kumar123 Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 Alright guys, I was dating a guy for 3 months. My last post was about how this guy has said rude things to me and was hurting my feelings with his words. This was a few weeks ago. I took everyone's advice and left him alone, ended it, etc. Well shortly after doing that he was super apologetic. We had a conversation where he told me he was scared of being in a relationship, was trying to sabotage it, and how he wanted to treat me the way I deserved. Here's the thing. I told him a few details he was unaware of about our situation involving long distance (we are not long distance now but will be for a short time in about 3 months). After hearing these details he said "Knowing that I'm now open to falling in love with you. Let's do this. Let's give a relationship a try. Let's go for it!" He definitely, 100% said those words which to me means he wants to try for a relationship. We had a big discussion about disrespect and so on. After that I was cautious but the next couple of weeks were pretty good. He went out of his way to spend time with me, I slept over as usual and the rude remarks came to a full stop. Then while we are cuddling in bed he tells me he still sees me as a friend. The next day I leave and we don't see each other for 5 days. We text a bit but we are both being distant. Then we have an argument over texting (lame, I know) because of what he told me that night and he refused to see me to discuss this in person because he was "frightened". I go over to his place and tell him I don't want to be anymore than friends. No kissing, sexual stuff, NOTHING! Then, the next day he apologizes, says he really wants to be around me and wants me to have Thanksgiving with his family. We hang out and it's good then the next day he's just a total jerk, ignoring me the whole time. I leave early and he tries to hug me from behind (total more than friendly move) and then I send him a text (since he refuses to have a conversation on the phone or in person) saying this isn't working for me. I'm confused and deserve to be treated better and that I care for him and appreciate knowing him but this situation and his actions have been hurting me. His response is totally bad. He says that I am f****d up, acting like an a*****e, he's done nothing wrong, that I'm scary and must be lonely, and how ridiculous I am acting! This was last night and I am still very upset by his response. Did I handle this appropriately? I re-read my texts and they were very kind. I didn't insult him. Just said that we clearly want different things and why his behavior has been confusing. I've never dated someone who has said such cruel remarks to me before like that.
befriendlyplease Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 Alright guys, I was dating a guy for 3 months. My last post was about how this guy has said rude things to me and was hurting my feelings with his words. This was a few weeks ago. I took everyone's advice and left him alone, ended it, etc. Well shortly after doing that he was super apologetic. We had a conversation where he told me he was scared of being in a relationship, was trying to sabotage it, and how he wanted to treat me the way I deserved. Here's the thing. I told him a few details he was unaware of about our situation involving long distance (we are not long distance now but will be for a short time in about 3 months). After hearing these details he said "Knowing that I'm now open to falling in love with you. Let's do this. Let's give a relationship a try. Let's go for it!" He definitely, 100% said those words which to me means he wants to try for a relationship. We had a big discussion about disrespect and so on. After that I was cautious but the next couple of weeks were pretty good. He went out of his way to spend time with me, I slept over as usual and the rude remarks came to a full stop. Then while we are cuddling in bed he tells me he still sees me as a friend. The next day I leave and we don't see each other for 5 days. We text a bit but we are both being distant. Then we have an argument over texting (lame, I know) because of what he told me that night and he refused to see me to discuss this in person because he was "frightened". I go over to his place and tell him I don't want to be anymore than friends. No kissing, sexual stuff, NOTHING! Then, the next day he apologizes, says he really wants to be around me and wants me to have Thanksgiving with his family. We hang out and it's good then the next day he's just a total jerk, ignoring me the whole time. I leave early and he tries to hug me from behind (total more than friendly move) and then I send him a text (since he refuses to have a conversation on the phone or in person) saying this isn't working for me. I'm confused and deserve to be treated better and that I care for him and appreciate knowing him but this situation and his actions have been hurting me. His response is totally bad. He says that I am f****d up, acting like an a*****e, he's done nothing wrong, that I'm scary and must be lonely, and how ridiculous I am acting! This was last night and I am still very upset by his response. Did I handle this appropriately? I re-read my texts and they were very kind. I didn't insult him. Just said that we clearly want different things and why his behavior has been confusing. I've never dated someone who has said such cruel remarks to me before like that. It sounds like it's his problem not yours. I think you should distance yourself from him and try to move on.
BlametheIrish Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 You dodged a bullet there. The guy sounds emotionally unstable. Consider yourself lucky and move on. 2
soccerrprp Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 He's using you like a yo-yo. Get out as you know this is all unhealthy.
Author kumar123 Posted November 24, 2013 Author Posted November 24, 2013 Thanks all! Egh and to make it more annoying he just texted me saying that I'm messed up and twist everything around. He said I need to grow up and how I'm the one making things confusing and how he's acting completely normal and I'm the one who's being manipulative and crazy. And then he ended the text with... "so you're still coming for Thanksgiving right?"... I mean seriously. And no, I haven't responded.
Yookie Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 Thanks all! Egh and to make it more annoying he just texted me saying that I'm messed up and twist everything around. He said I need to grow up and how I'm the one making things confusing and how he's acting completely normal and I'm the one who's being manipulative and crazy. And then he ended the text with... "so you're still coming for Thanksgiving right?"... I mean seriously. And no, I haven't responded. Please please pleeeeease stay away from that psycho!!! :(
NJtoDC Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 He runs hot and cold. He sounds immature and unstable. Good for you on not responding. Defending yourself won't benefit anything and will just prolong this craziness and encourage him to keep it up. You can do better than this guy. Good luck!
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