EX isn't interested anymore?

[CMPUNK]

My partner and I, both 21, recently (6 weeks ago) mutually agreed to split up.

She has family abroad in Australia and I know she wants to go back over there for a year or two. So I instigated the conversation (the biggest mistake of my life).

 

30 months together, the first 24 were brilliant, we did everything. The last 6 were made difficult, we were forced to move in together due to her having nowhere to live. At the time we were really excited, like anybody would be. As time went on, the financial strain took full effect. We had no money to do the things we did, the things that made our relationship. We would go all over the country, see shows stay in hotels, go for drinks. It was awesome. Another contributing factor, her past. I had issues with it and although I almost got over it I would mention it. Not all the time, but occasionally. I've now grown that that, I've realised the mistakes I made.

 

So yeah, we split six weeks ago. About 2/3 weeks after the split I asked how she felt about getting back together, I honestly thought she would jump at the chance. She said no. I couldn't understand, It completely broke me. I then made a massive mistake, I hounded her for the next two weeks or so, crying, begging and I just hope this hasn't damaged that chance of reconciling in the future.

 

She gave me that cliche answer as an excuse for the no, it's not you it's me?!! Whats that supposed to mean? Anyhow, she said her feelings have changed?! What in three weeks? I myself can't see it, we had some brilliant memories, the last six months killed it a little but now we've moved back home so I thought it be worth giving it a go. It's still a no, after 30 strong months, all I get is a no, not a second chance. I feel robbed. We have always been honest with each other, never cheated. She tells me theres nobody else and I believe her.

 

We have a few shows booked in March/April. Both will require us to stay at an hotel. Hopefully by that time, I'm in a position to make the transition from friendship back to our strong relationship.

 

I've had previous girlfriends, 8 months, 2 years etc but when they all split I never really felt any pain. This one though, it's hit me for 6. You never no what you've got until it's gone. Any advice on how to stem the pain, every time I go out it reminds me of us. All the silly little things. I'm prepared to go to Aus with her, prior to the split I wasn't keen, and thats because in the 6 months i turned into a boring man, who thought about mortgages and not enjoying my life. It's give me a sense of realisation, hopefully she soon comes round.

 

It's been 6 weeks, next Friday we are off for drinks/bowling. Arranged a while ago, can I make this work. I am once again the guy she fell in love with, not the guy she broke up with.

[Milad]

My partner and I, both 21, recently (6 weeks ago) mutually agreed to split up.

She has family abroad in Australia and I know she wants to go back over there for a year or two. So I instigated the conversation (the biggest mistake of my life).

 

30 months together, the first 24 were brilliant, we did everything. The last 6 were made difficult, we were forced to move in together due to her having nowhere to live. At the time we were really excited, like anybody would be. As time went on, the financial strain took full effect. We had no money to do the things we did, the things that made our relationship. We would go all over the country, see shows stay in hotels, go for drinks. It was awesome. Another contributing factor, her past. I had issues with it and although I almost got over it I would mention it. Not all the time, but occasionally. I've now grown that that, I've realised the mistakes I made.

 

So yeah, we split six weeks ago. About 2/3 weeks after the split I asked how she felt about getting back together, I honestly thought she would jump at the chance. She said no. I couldn't understand, It completely broke me. I then made a massive mistake, I hounded her for the next two weeks or so, crying, begging and I just hope this hasn't damaged that chance of reconciling in the future.

 

She gave me that cliche answer as an excuse for the no, it's not you it's me?!! Whats that supposed to mean? Anyhow, she said her feelings have changed?! What in three weeks? I myself can't see it, we had some brilliant memories, the last six months killed it a little but now we've moved back home so I thought it be worth giving it a go. It's still a no, after 30 strong months, all I get is a no, not a second chance. I feel robbed. We have always been honest with each other, never cheated. She tells me theres nobody else and I believe her.

 

We have a few shows booked in March/April. Both will require us to stay at an hotel. Hopefully by that time, I'm in a position to make the transition from friendship back to our strong relationship.

 

I've had previous girlfriends, 8 months, 2 years etc but when they all split I never really felt any pain. This one though, it's hit me for 6. You never no what you've got until it's gone. Any advice on how to stem the pain, every time I go out it reminds me of us. All the silly little things. I'm prepared to go to Aus with her, prior to the split I wasn't keen, and thats because in the 6 months i turned into a boring man, who thought about mortgages and not enjoying my life. It's give me a sense of realisation, hopefully she soon comes round.

 

It's been 6 weeks, next Friday we are off for drinks/bowling. Arranged a while ago, can I make this work. I am once again the guy she fell in love with, not the guy she broke up with.

 

Try mate, try, but dont give yourself too much hope. get ready for a "no". the more hopeful you are, the more you will be hurt when she deny you.

 

Good luck

[elbe]

I'm not sure I would recommend moving to AUS chasing your lost lover who doesn't seem at all interested in the reconciliation that you seek. Imagine the same breakup after you moved to another country for her and she wouldn't feel bad for one second.