Give me some input. Unique situation here.

[Crushedjustcrushed]

Ok, here’s a new wrinkle to my story (if you caught it months ago).

 

We are both in our early forties. We dated for about 5-6 months. Talked about being in love and everything. Texting all the time, sleeping over, etc. The full nine yards.

 

Then, after about 6 months, she ghosted me. Just flat disappeared. No texts, no calls, when I’d ask her out, she’d make excuses, all by text. She refused to talk to me on the phone or in person. One day we are fine, the next, nothing.

 

This went on for about a month, then finally I confronted her after I caught her in a big lie one evening (of course, by text, as she refused to talk on the phone or meet in person), she basically said (by text) we are done. NO reason, other than she said “I just don’t want to be in a relationship right now.” I took that to mean, she found someone else, which was imo, ok, if she had just been honest with me about it. I had showed some of her texts over the months we dated, to a girl I work with (who I kind of bounce relationship stuff off of – she’s married) and she said to me, “This girl is just being plain mean to you.”

 

So, here’s the wrinkle. I work for a state taxing agency. This chick told me when we started dating, that she hated to pay taxes (who doesn’t?), and that when she got divorced about 10 years ago, her ex husband stuck her with a bunch of unpaid back taxes from his business. But, she said she finally paid them off (to my taxing agency), in the last few years. I never questioned it, or looked it up. I had no reason to think she was lying. She was very adamant about hating the taxing agencies, and was very right wing/fox news/obama sucks, etc.

 

So, anyway, after we broke up, I had to go to the courthouse one day for work about a month ago, and I just decided to look up her name in the public lien records to see if we ever filed liens against her. And blammo, there’s about 10 grand worth of tax liens from my agency against her, still active and not released. And some from just as recently as a little over a year ago, and most of them, were from after she was divorced (maybe all of them were from after he divorce, I’m not sure, but I’d say 90% of them are). So, she lied about 1) paying it off, and 2) it being from her ex husband. Most of the taxes were from years after they divorced, so it wasn’t her ex husband’s fault. This was money she clearly owed from her income.

 

So, she still owes this money. The kicker is this, she’s a government employee too. I know, the hypocrisy is pretty staggering. A government employee, but hates to (and refuses to) pay taxes that actually funds her paycheck. She works for another agency, but her paycheck is funded directly from the money my agency collects. But, my taxing agency doesn’t know this. If I told someone who I work with every day, that she works for the government, they’d garnish her paycheck to get that money. They’d take all of it except about 250 bucks a week, and she’d be powerless to stop it, until its all paid off. She makes pretty good money (probably takes home 3500 a month). That'd be like 3 months with basically no paycheck. Because she works for the government, it would be basically no trouble at all for them to garnish her paycheck. The biggest problem in garnishing a paycheck, is finding the employer, and getting the employer to go along with it. In this case, that’s not a problem. We just didn’t know (and still don’t, technically, except for me), that she works for the same level of government as my agency.

 

Do I drop the dime on her? I’m certain we are done, I haven't seen her in months, and haven't talked to her months, and after the way it ended and how she treated me, I have no illusions of getting back together. In short, she doesn't deserve someone as good as me (plus I'm seeing someone else now anyway). Give me your thoughts.

[OpheliaSong]

Why would you do that? For revenge? For your government? Are you doing this as part of your job, being a good citizen or because she dumped you?

[headinthecloud]

Sounds a tad vindictive to me. I would let her situation play out without your intervention. She did you a favor by ending things with you. Try to move on. She obviously has a lot of issues - be glad you're free of her lies. You deserve someone who's honest and loves you for you. Let it go and move on. NC.

[bubbaganoosh]

Let them find out on their own. To turn her in is really childish and I think it would make you feel really guilty down the road and honestly it will do you no good anyhow.