SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Ok so here goes, I was in a relationship with a girl for a year, from last october to this october. Now I know you guys are probably gonna hate me and think im a creep for saying this but the only reason I was in the relationship with her was because I wanted easy booty, and I knew I could get it from her when after going out the first date she wanted to jump my bones, I stood back though and pretended to be a suave guy and said that I am not ready, haha imagine a male saying that. I waited two weeks to prolong the experience we would make out every night, and finally we had it out. We would have sex 4-5 times a day, as you can see this was my main reason for being with her, I had a panic attack one day at work and I was in another world of my own I did not know what was going on I had never been through one, and I ended up saying that I was in love with her a month after us dating. I never really loved her but she thought I did and she loved me. The whole time I really did not want to be with her and almost every night I wanted to leave her, the only reason I stood around was for the sex mainly, and also her saying that if I wasnt in her life she didnt know what she would do, and that she might kill herself, i forgot where this conversation came from but she said it. So I get her pregnant and I tell her I don't want the kid and say some other things like she will **** my life up if she has the kid and that she was using me just to have a baby , she gets very depressed and she goes out and drinks herself until she is totally hammered 2 days ina row and I found out she does coke. On the monday thereafter she goes to the doctor to see how the baby is coming along and she finds out she is having a miscarriage once again I am relieved I know this sounds evil but I did not want a kid, I think I am too young 22 years old and I didnt plan on staying with this girl. So then I keep dragging on with her being emotional toward her feelings because one night she attempted to slit her wrist, I found a knife on the ground in the bathroom one night after going otu and partying, she had pissed me off so I left her to do her own thing at her own party. I found out that she had started talking to this marine that she dated before me for 2 weeks and he left to Iraq. Well she breaksup with me in October and starts dating this dude. The main thing that I am trying to relate to right now is why do I miss her?? If I never loved her and used her just for the sex, why have I been so miserable the last 2 months, I have felt like a total loser too, the fact that I got dumped to be with this dorky marine. I know that she found out that things werent working out and I wasnt saying I love her anymore so she caught on, but why would I feel so affected I don't understand, maybe there is a psychology major in here that can help me out???? Sorry for the long story Lol.
mehim Posted December 28, 2004 Posted December 28, 2004 well u got used to her being there in ur life for a whole year, and the biggest thing is that she dumped u, and that hurts, the rejection sux. u might had more feelings for her than u thought u did. u may not have aknolwedeged it to urself, or u dont want to admit it. the fact that she is with someone else is hurting u even more, cuz of the competetion, u feel like a loser cuz another guy got her now. im sure u shared something more than just sex with her, so u miss her.
Author SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Author Posted December 28, 2004 What I cant understand though is if I wanted to leave her almost every day while I was with her why would I be upset that she left me lol. Maybe its just the fact that I wanted to dump her so many times and finally she dumped me.
moon Posted December 28, 2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Sorry, I don't know what to tell you, but that was funny when you said you were mad (but didn't know why) because she went off with the dorky marine. Maybe you should start thinking about what love is to you. Have you ever been in love? Maybe you did love this girl, but you were too blinded by sex to notice. What I know from the only easy break up I've ever had is that when break ups don't hurt much it's because you weren't in love with them anymore (or at all). They hurt like crazy when you loved them. They can also hurt like hell when you loved them and they went off with somebody else. I think you might feel disappointed, embarrased or angry if somebody leaves you for somebody else when you weren't in love. But two months of misery says to me that you were probably in love. How do you know you were not in love? Would you really stay with somebody just for the sex? There must have been a lot of attraction there no matter what to be loving the sex so much. Your ex sounds pretty needy and you probably also got really used to her needing you. You probably don't know what to do with yourself anymore. She probably made you feel important. Next time don't use somebody for sex and lie and say you love them. What were you hoping to get out of that??? But it sounds like you probably loved her. Face it.
johan Posted December 28, 2004 Posted December 28, 2004 You had her. You thought you owned her and could do whatever you wanted. You didn't respect her at all. Then this preson you didn't respect at all turned the tables on you and ran off with someone else. You have no influence over her. Big shock to the system considering you built your self image on being able to have her any time you wanted. Before you can get over her, you'll have to get over yourself. Or maybe you can just fill the empty spot with some other girl.
indigo_moon Posted December 28, 2004 Posted December 28, 2004 You had no respect for this girl. She was nothing to you but an easy lay and something to use. I don't buy your lame story about you not being "with it" when you professed your love to her....you were likely just telling her this BS to keep her hanging on. You treated her like a hooker and then when you got her pregnant (what, never heard of condoms?) you wanted her to get rid of the baby...and you were actually "glad" when she went through a miscarriage...citing you weren't old enough....well butthead, if you were old enough to use this girl as a sperm receptacle, you should have been old enough to be responsible. And you have the AUDACITY to call this new guy a "dorky Marine"? Son, he is more of a man than you'll ever be. He has better things to do than use women..........he's taking the initiative to put his ass on the line and serve his country. His biggest concern won't be how to get into a chick's pants, it will be how to avoid getting his head blown off from an Improvised Explosive Device, while fighting for his country and the betterment of the free world. You could surely learn a lesson from this courageous young man. Grow the hell up!
Author SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Author Posted December 28, 2004 I knew someone would try to flame me, she got pregnant because she lied to me, she said she was on birth control and she really wasnt, so she was trying to get me caught in a snare. You can talk all the **** you want to me but I really am not that bad of a guy, obviously if I was then I would have just broke up with her, I must have some sort of concious if I was worried about her killing herself. You need to get the whole story, and you clearly didnt, you just chose to flame. =)
Author SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Author Posted December 28, 2004 I knew someone would try to flame me, she got pregnant because she lied to me, she said she was on birth control and she really wasnt, so she was trying to get me caught in a snare. You can talk all the **** you want to me but I really am not that bad of a guy, obviously if I was then I would have just broke up with her, I must have some sort of concious if I was worried about her killing herself. You need to get the whole story, and you clearly didnt, you just chose to flame. Also I was in the army so suck a fat one =) I was calling him dorky because he is a toothless backwoods yokel from texas, probably just like you =)
indigo_moon Posted December 28, 2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Don't know the whole story? Well sorry junior, none of us here are psychic, we can only go by the details you posted.....and believe me, there was plenty in there that indicated you didn't give a rat's arse about her. And you were in the Army? Well apparently you're not now, and Mr Toothless Yokel is the one who's over there in Iraq, putting his butt on the line - so that player chumps such as yourself can have freedom. And don't say you cared that she'd tried to kill herself....you wrote that you found a knife and you left her to "do her own thing." Here, let me copy your exact words: "one night she attempted to slit her wrist, I found a knife on the ground in the bathroom one night after going otu and partying, she had pissed me off so I left her to do her own thing at her own party." Not once did you indicate giving a sh*t about her, in fact, you were quite arrogant in your assertion that from the very start you were manipulating her and with her only because you wanted to use her. The poor girl gets pregnant and you tell her she'll "f*ck" up your life if she has a kid....what about her life? And she said she was on birth control? Well maybe she was......the Pill isn't 100% effective..............where were your CONDOMS or don't you take any responsibility when it comes to birth control?? You string this girl along, she's obviously got not much self esteem......you tell her you LOVE HER for crying out loud.....what girl doesn't want to hear that? What a player. You knock her up then you tell her to get rid of the baby because she'll f-ck up your life......and you wonder why she was depressed? such that she drank for 2 days and got all coked up? Hell, she was just doing what you told her, getting rid of the baby..surely knowing doing this would cause a miscarriage. Not ONCE have you said you were sorry..............you're just sorry she finally mustered up the courage and intelligence to dump your user ass. You're just ego-smacked because she chose a real man over you. I hope and pray for her sake that things with the Marine work out.........and that she learns to love herself and not let little punks like you use her and abuse her. I hope she recovers from being so young and having to deal with the loss of a baby........and should she ever lose a baby again, I pray she has a real man in her life who will support her and comfort her, not be glad the baby died.
Author SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Author Posted December 28, 2004 Once again, I let her do her own thing as in she went to a party that I was not invited to so I went to my own party and she thought I was cheating on her so she slashed her wrist, you can't seem to interperet what you are reading.
Author SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Author Posted December 28, 2004 I honestly could give a rats ass what you think about me, I've noticed that you can't interpret what people are writing because I said I left her to do her own thing as in going to her own party without inviting me so I went to my boys party, she slit her wrist because she thought I was cheating on her which I was not. Read everything twice before you make yourself look like a jackass. She was not an angel so you can think what you will, she had a lot of baggage.
Author SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Author Posted December 28, 2004 And she even admitted to me that she wasnt using birth control when she got pregant, she said she was while we were having sex, and she denied it afterwards but finally admitted it to me. She wanted to keep me with her forever by getting her pregnant but it didnt work out like she had planned. And I would like to have a baby with the right girl, there is nothing that I said that would indicate that I hate babies or wish they would die I just said I was not ready to be locked down to a girl that I did not love. She did not have to go on a drinking binge and snort coke, I told her if she wanted to keep the baby thats fine, I just told her I didnt want it.
indigo_moon Posted December 28, 2004 Posted December 28, 2004 You rag on me for my apparent misinterpretation of what you've written? Well junior, you obviously LEFT OUT THE PART about her thinking you were cheating ---- that was nowhere in your original post. Funny how all these "new facts" are coming to light. So what she wasn't an angel? That obviously didn't bother you when you were using her for sex 4-5 times a day so why bring that up now? And shame on you for telling a girl you love her when you really don't. That's cruel - and you can make up some lame-assed story about having had a panic attack and not being coherent enough to know what you were saying, but I'm not buying it. And wow, what a man you are for telling her it was okay for her to have the baby BUT that you didn't "want it"........how do you think that was going to make her feel? Imagine how you felt, not wanting to be 22 yrs old and tied down with the responsibility of a child..........well how do you think she'd have felt, being young also and having to go through a pregnancy all alone, without a real man to support her and be a father for THEIR child? You have a lot of growing up to do. Is this how your Mother raised you to treat girls? Is this how you'd like someone to treat your sister? It's guys like yourself who treat young women like scum........you play them and con them and use them like they're an old pair of shoes........and these poor girls take this crap and end up with no self esteem and start to really believe that they're good for nothing more than to have sex with...........and that's why they become "easy"....because they don't know what it's like to have a young man respect them or be honest with them.........they feel the only way they can get a guy's attention is to offer sex. I will not waste anymore of my time responding to your crap. Again, I wish her the very best ,wherever she is..........I pray she learns to love herself and realizes she's worthy of a good man who will REALLY love her............that she's more than just a piece of ass.
Author SadFellow2004 Posted December 28, 2004 Author Posted December 28, 2004 Ha ha, i really did have a panic attack I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder it was unlike anything I had ever been through at the time. And by the way the guy thats with her is treating her even worse hahaha, so shes gonna need a lot of praying to help her out, she is a balloon now, she gained 50 pounds in the last 2 months.
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