djcos25 Posted November 19, 2013 Posted November 19, 2013 Anyone ever use this app? Its a social networking service founded in 2005 and provides the opportunity to interact and meet new people. It's like Facebook in a way, you can post status updates, photos, send friend requests, etc. Anyway, I posted a status update about my job, then a few days later this girl comments on it, saying she used to work there. She then likes all my photos (I have like 4 up) so I sent her a friend request, and she accepted. I asked for her number, but she asked if I have kik, which is like a texting app without giving away your phone number. We have been texting non-stop since Sunday. I asked her for drinks for Thursday and as of now we're still on. There is obvious flirting going on, nothing sexual. We talk about if we hit the lottery, she asks if I can take her with her, talking about cuddle buddies (no idea lol) and I have told her I think she's pretty, she thinks I'm handsome and likes talking to me, I'm easy to talk to and I can keep a conversation going. The problem? I asked her last night what she's looking for. Her response: "No expectations, just to chat not really looking for anything I got out of a long relationship and I'm just focused on working and saving money so I can move out." What I was going to do was if Thursday goes well I was going to ask her to dinner. I asked one of my friends (whos a girl) and she said to ask her out anyway, go with the flow. Now that there's a potential speed bump, how do I proceed?
Author djcos25 Posted November 19, 2013 Author Posted November 19, 2013 Just a bump, thread almost got to the second page.
Author djcos25 Posted November 20, 2013 Author Posted November 20, 2013 Last time, anyone? I'm meeting her for drinks tomorrow, I'd appreciate some advice.
deathandtaxes Posted November 20, 2013 Posted November 20, 2013 Enjoy the drinks. Leave your expectations at the door. Have fun.
acrosstheuniverse Posted November 20, 2013 Posted November 20, 2013 Go and have fun. Some people don't think they're looking for anything too heavy until they meet the right person, and then that can sometimes change. Just proceed as though you'd never had that discussion. Personally if a guy asks me what I'm looking for, even if I'm in a place where I could have a relationship I'm not exactly going to say that to him. It puts too much pressure on something too soon and could make him think that I want one with him. I'm more likely to just say that I'm not looking for anything specific but I'm open to seeing where things head.
Author djcos25 Posted November 20, 2013 Author Posted November 20, 2013 (edited) Ok thank you. Sorry for the thread bumping lol. It's Wednesday evening and we're still texting back and forth. Should I have not asked what she was looking for? I only asked because its not exactly a dating site. The tagline is "Where new friends meet." Also she asked me and I said dating. If it goes well should I ask her to dinner? Edited November 20, 2013 by djcos25
phineas Posted November 21, 2013 Posted November 21, 2013 I get a lot of married women off that site looking for some fun contacting me. I've also had a few women contact me just to hook up.
Author djcos25 Posted November 21, 2013 Author Posted November 21, 2013 Had a girl contact me, we started texting and I asked to meet for lunch. She told me she lost her license due to a DUI and won't get it back until next June when she turns 18. I don't think I ever deleted a number as fast as I did right there. She looked 22. Any advice for my previous questions? We're texting so much we might run out of things to talk about come Thursday night haha.
Author djcos25 Posted November 21, 2013 Author Posted November 21, 2013 (edited) How did it go? I'm meeting her tonight, we're still on. We're still texting non-stop. However she had a doctor's appointment today, she was there for 2 hours and they didn't take her so she has to go back next Wednesday. She was annoyed so I backed off a bit for now. Edit: She just texted me and cancelled on me. Edited November 21, 2013 by djcos25
Author djcos25 Posted November 21, 2013 Author Posted November 21, 2013 (edited) She didn't give a reason, all she said was "Not going to be able to meet up tonight I'm sorry." No reason yet so I asked if everything was ok. Thoughts? Edit: She told me the other day that she put in for a new job where she would be working second shift. She told me now its a job interview for that, so nothing bad happened. We rescheduled for Saturday night, and then she sent me a pic. Edited November 21, 2013 by djcos25
Shepp Posted November 21, 2013 Posted November 21, 2013 I think you asked her a hard question buddy... how was she meant to answer: "Im looking for someone to spend the rest of my life with" = Psycho desperate stalker "Im looking for a relationship" = Moving wayyy fast "To have fun ;)" = blimey how many guys is she saying that too.
Author djcos25 Posted November 21, 2013 Author Posted November 21, 2013 What was wrong with what I asked? I only asked because its not exactly a dating site. Forgot to mention, after she cancelled and tried to reschedule, I asked for Friday. Originally she said she couldn't as she's seeing a movie with her friends. She's working 7-3, I got 3-8. So I asked for Saturday and she said ok.
acrosstheuniverse Posted November 21, 2013 Posted November 21, 2013 I would personally wait until you've met at least once or twice before asking something like that. Like Shepp said, it's difficult to answer. Just treat it as though you're meeting up with a potential new friend and go have fun. Once you've been out a couple of times you can both assess how you feel about one another and state what you're looking for from your own personal friendship/potential relationship.
Shepp Posted November 21, 2013 Posted November 21, 2013 What was wrong with what I asked? I only asked because its not exactly a dating site. Right, but she's never even met you and your putting her on the spot. I mean if its a case that you don't want to meet up if its just a friends thing then it should of been for you to say "I need to let you know that i'm looking for xyz" (even thou personally I still think that's a bit much when you haven't met) but at least your putting yourself out there rather than making her. Don't get me wrong I don't think it was a terrible or a massive deal I just think she was...cagey because she was backed into a corner a bit - she had to second guess what you wanted her to say to avoid coming on to strong (if she likes you) or hurting you (if she doesn't) Just chill brother - see where it takes you.
todreaminblue Posted November 21, 2013 Posted November 21, 2013 Ok thank you. Sorry for the thread bumping lol. It's Wednesday evening and we're still texting back and forth. Should I have not asked what she was looking for? I only asked because its not exactly a dating site. The tagline is "Where new friends meet." Also she asked me and I said dating. If it goes well should I ask her to dinner? i dotn think its wrong to ask what you are looking for i do it all the time.......if a guy says yeah looking fro some fun i just say we dont match then and i wish them well...its always polite and i am lucky i guess guys are straight up with me......they could try and play me and that would waste a lot of time effort.....she has told you no expectations .....she just got out of a break up the only way you should go into it is the same way, if you dont feel you can, it isnt right for you ...dont worry about what you have said...own it...you said nothing wrong.......best of luck....deb
jphcbpa Posted November 21, 2013 Posted November 21, 2013 I get a lot of married women off that site looking for some fun contacting me. I've also had a few women contact me just to hook up. is this primarily a hook up site or can you meet for networking, friends ect??
phineas Posted November 22, 2013 Posted November 22, 2013 is this primarily a hook up site or can you meet for networking, friends ect?? I think it used to be yearbook.com or something like that. It's a cross between facebook & okcupid. The only guys who tried to friend me were gay & there can be a lot of dude's getting heated over a chick who posts "who want to take me out tonight" Normally I just add a ton of hot women then post interesting pics or stuff i'm doing and let them come to me.
phineas Posted November 22, 2013 Posted November 22, 2013 Edit: She just texted me and cancelled on me. No reason without a reschedule doesn't deserve a response. If they give me an obvious BS reason I just respond with "lame".
Author djcos25 Posted November 22, 2013 Author Posted November 22, 2013 (edited) Yeah I was all excited to meet her tonight too. Sunday-Wednesday we texted non-stop. Now today she cancelled and we haven't texted like we have been. She didn't give a reason, which I found odd. When she said "I can't make it tonight I'm sorry" I took it as something happened. I asked if she was ok and she said she had that job interview tonight. I found it odd - a job interview, at night, when we were supposed to meet up? Hmm.. Granted the job was for second shift, and she did tell me she applied for this a few days ago.. but still. I asked to reschedule for Friday, she agreed but then said she was seeing a movie with her friends (short notice I know). Then I asked for Saturday, she told me she thinks Saturday will work, she gets out at 5. I made it for 7:30. She then sent me a pic of her. Earlier in the week we texted about our past dating experiences, she told me she almost died at one point. She met one guy over his house, which she admitted was stupid on her part. She walks in and the guy puts a bag over her head and tries to rape her. She reached into her purse and stabbed the guy, ran out, called 911 and now the guy is in jail. Do you think she's maybe hesitant to meet me? I am FAR, FAR from that. Edited November 22, 2013 by djcos25
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