precious13itch Posted December 26, 2004 Posted December 26, 2004 [color=violet][font=arial][font=times new roman][font=courier new][font=times new roman]well im here b-cuz i need sum advise....i fell inlove online...itz been a little over 3 years and me and that other person have been single...but then i didn't want 2 make him feel like i was holding him back from doing anything...so i told him that he should start dating...so like a month ago he started avoiding me...and one day i jus went of on him...and he told me that another girl is having his baby and that he doesn't know how it happened...i asked him if he loved her and he said yea...but he also said he loves me...and after that he blocked me...and i dont know what 2 do b-cuz i really do love him and i do wanna b there for him..and i tol him that...what should i do? should i make another s/n..and if so what should i tell him?[/font][/font][/font][/font][/color]
sean001 Posted December 26, 2004 Posted December 26, 2004 Hey I'm sorry about your situation, have u 2 ever met? U may want to move on -- him having a baby with another gurl is a big thing...
Author precious13itch Posted December 26, 2004 Author Posted December 26, 2004 thats the thing...we haven't met....but we were ganna...i really wanted 2....n he also did....idk but i even sliced muhself..cuz he hurt me so much..
sean001 Posted December 26, 2004 Posted December 26, 2004 SLICED YOURSELF !!!!! my goddd YOU NEED TO GET HELP RIGHT NOW!!!! WHERE DID YOU CUT YOURSELF?
Author precious13itch Posted December 26, 2004 Author Posted December 26, 2004 we were chattin 4 a lil over 3 years...nd i sliced myself on muh forearm
Naive Posted December 26, 2004 Posted December 26, 2004 You guys chatted for 3 years and you never met him??? This is ridiculous. How do you know that anything he told you was real? You have to learn from this and not let someone you do not even know in person fool you so bad. I don't think that cutting yourself is the answer, what is that going to do? How long ago did you do that?
alphamale Posted December 26, 2004 Posted December 26, 2004 Originally posted by precious13itch [color=violet][font=arial][font=times new roman][font=courier new][font=times new roman]...and he told me that another girl is having his baby and that he doesn't know how it happened...[/font][/font][/font][/font][/color] hmmm...so he knocked some chick up and does not know how it happened?!? was he paying attention in health class? I have some nice documentation he could look at...
indigo_moon Posted December 26, 2004 Posted December 26, 2004 It is NOT a real relationship if you've only "chatted" with someone for any significant period of time (which 3 yrs surely is) and have never even met them in person. Real relationships involve face to face contact.....soon after you begin chatting.......it involve spending time together "in real life"....going for dinner, going to movies, talking in person, etc. And you surely cannot fall in love with someone you've never spent "real life" time with. Maybe you're just young?
RecordProducer Posted March 16, 2005 Posted March 16, 2005 My favorite part of this post was: "He told me that another girl is having his baby and that he doesn't know how it happened..." Anyone any ideas how it might have happened? If you think that he was masturbating thinking of you and some of his sperm ended up on the sheets...then this girl came to his house and stole it from the sheet... then... whatever... Usually when I read the posts I feel sorry for the people who cope or hope...but this one almost made me laugh. Three years of chatting and never met in person? That sounds like you never would and now you never will. You love what you think he is, but he must be very different in person if he never made the effort to meet you. I talked to a guy for 4 months and we were both very much "in love" until the moment I met him. It's not that he looked uglier in person than on webcam (he didn't and I am not so shallow anyway), it's just that he was a completely different person. My smart, self-confident, sweet, and kind, super fun hero turned out to be a boring, over-demanding, hypochondrious a**. On the other hand, I met my current boyfriend after two weeks of doing online "dating" and he was even better than I expected. He is absolutely great. Buy the fact is, you don't really know what he is like until you meet him. For some reason they say "it's better to see once than hear a 1,000 times."
JazzyFox Posted March 17, 2005 Posted March 17, 2005 Originally posted by RecordProducer For some reason they say "it's better to see once than hear a 1,000 times." RP, I'm becoming your biggest fan! I love that quote. Especially when it comes to online dating. I tried it out a few years ago, and was in a similar situation to precious ... chatted over 2 years on and off with someone I was absolutely smitten with. And then, all of a sudden, I started seeing through his lies and started asking specific questions ... he didn't like it, said I didn't trust him, and took a hike. But leading up to that point, the emotions he was able to muster in me were pretty in incredible. I would get goosebumps at every email, chat, phone call. And while at the very beginning, he was open to meeting me ... I wasn't ready. But towards the end, he was the one that wasn't ready. Moral of the story is, meet them asap. Don't let it go on for weeks and weeks, even less for months and months. Online dating must be counted in days. End of story. Anyways, I've stopped online dating, cuz it's just too hard emotionally. You get attached, then meet them and it's like "ugh!" It's such a disappointment. I had one good experience, and 20 duds. Not a good ratio ... and that's probably the norm. So precious, you need to cut him off, cold turkey ... and get out into the real world and meet the nice guys in your neighbourhood or at your school. Good luck!
RecordProducer Posted March 17, 2005 Posted March 17, 2005 Thank you, Jazzy Fox. I agree that online communication prior to meeting in person should last as short as possible. There are also signs that can tell you a lot about the person. Phone calls and meeting plans should start right away and you're eyes should be wide open about everything (s)he says or does. However online dating is real life too and limiting yourself to the local people can prevent you from meeting someone really great. We don't give up in advance just because the ratio of success is pretty low. Then we shouldn't fall in love or get married at all either. This world is a better place to live because so many people stepped beyond their limits and explored the maximum of their abilities. The Internet put the whole world in our hands, shouldn't we take advantage of it?
bluetuesday Posted March 17, 2005 Posted March 17, 2005 i may as well throw my hat into the ring. online love is utter lunacy. i should know. i'm experiencing it. well, love or something like it. we live 5,600 miles apart. it's not at easy as hopping on a bus.
JazzyFox Posted March 18, 2005 Posted March 18, 2005 Originally posted by RecordProducer However online dating is real life too and limiting yourself to the local people can prevent you from meeting someone really great. We don't give up in advance just because the ratio of success is pretty low. Then we shouldn't fall in love or get married at all either. This world is a better place to live because so many people stepped beyond their limits and explored the maximum of their abilities. The Internet put the whole world in our hands, shouldn't we take advantage of it? Hmmm you might just have a point there RP. Perhaps I'm a bit too jaded for my own good. I guess I just hate the social stigma attached to online dating, and the potential for falling in a trap of "loving the image we create" Which is why it is soooo important to meet them asap. Of course that is always a bit difficult when it is not only online, but LDR as well.
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted March 18, 2005 Posted March 18, 2005 Originally posted by precious13itch he doesn't know how it happened... seriously!!!!!!!! Sorry, yes you need to move on. find someone you can be with physically.
nzchick Posted March 28, 2005 Posted March 28, 2005 Seriously, cant you see he doesnt care. I'm sorry I'm so straightforward but thats the truth. He doesnt care about what you guys have! He cant say "I DONT KNOW HOW I HAD THE BABY" what the hell? If I know he really doesnt have a baby or whatever he's just using that stupid excuse! LEt go of that freak. Find someone else im sure someone will value you more!
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