cocoaraisinsx Posted November 17, 2013 Posted November 17, 2013 Met a guy at a bar last month and chatted with him for a while. We really hit it off and had a great time. He asked for my number and if I could have dinner the next night. I said no because I already had plans but tried to reschedule with him for the following night. He had a 2 week trip for business which meant that he wasn't gonna be able to make it. He left with my number but I didn't expect to hear back from him since he was gonna be on this trip for 2 weeks. The next day, I get a text from him asking if I really can't make it that night. I told him no. He told me that he would contact me when he got back. I texted him the next day (the day he had the trip) to let him know that I hope he had a good trip. No reply. During those days he was gone I texted him again just to say hi. No reply again. At this point, I figured that he had forgotten all about me and even though I really enjoyed his company, I decided that it was a fun night and that was all there was to it. I had set my mind to forget him completely. Fast foward two weeks, I get a text from him asking me out for drinks. At this point I was really ready to move on and I wasn't expecting this at all since he didn't reply any of my texts earlier. Again, my hopes are sparked up and I decide to go out with him. We had a lot of fun, and made out at several places. No contact from him again. I decided I'd ask him out five days later. He blew me off saying that he was gonna be busy. Feeling deflated and rejected, I called out some friends to go out to meet other people so I could forget about him. Lo and behold who do I bump into. He ditches his friends to hang out with me and we had another great night. Made out and he invites me over. I decline because I had early plans the next morning but asked him if he'd invite me over again. He contacts me asking if I got home safely that night. Two days later, still no contact from him. And all I can think about is him. I can't get him out of my mind, I'm checking my phone every couple of minutes throughout the day and frankly, I'm so exhausted. He's clearly not into me but I fell for him so fast, I don't even know how. Each time we hung out, I felt so much connection, but he clearly doesn't feel the same way if he never texts me. I feel like such a sucker and I can't stop feeling sad about being so rejected. I know I should forget about him but for some reason, I am just so infatuated
Ruby Slippers Posted November 17, 2013 Posted November 17, 2013 Delete his number. He's clearly not into you, and could easily take advantage of your feelings if you keep chasing him as you are. If you have sex with him and he ignores you, it will hurt much worse. 1
Leigh 87 Posted November 17, 2013 Posted November 17, 2013 The important thing is that you spot a guy that is not into you sooner rather than later. When a guy is truly moved by you to put forth the effort, it generally goes like this: - guy meets girl in bar. - guy gets girls number and texts her the next day, if not later that night. - guy texts her daily until he arranged a date again, within a week or two max Anything else, that is not this ^^^^ means he is just not that into you. ....................................... It really is that simply, however, it can be hard when there is sexual chemistry involved. Often times, a man can find you really attractive, yet he doesn't feel moved by you; you do not light his fire. Guys are really good at using sexual chemistry to make you feel special to them; the making out, talking, the good connection... To him you are a pretty girl he enjoys being around, but that is it. A guy can really like hanging with you, yet without being all that into you in a romantic sense. 1
d0nnivain Posted November 17, 2013 Posted November 17, 2013 Infatuated is not a terrible thing although here you feel bad because it's not mutual. Give yourself a break. You did things you wanted to do -- make out with him -- & you enjoyed them. It's good to know that you still have the ability for the spark & that you can attract men who give it to you. Even if he's not the one, perhaps the next guy or the guy after that will be better. For now, find ways to keep yourself busy so you aren't always looking at your phone.
Author cocoaraisinsx Posted November 18, 2013 Author Posted November 18, 2013 Do you think that it would be possible that he is just not a texter? I asked him that night why he doesn't ever text me and he was like Huh I do text you. Then he laughed and said I was such a girl and then kissed me. What does that mean?! Duh I'm a girl!
MidwestUSA Posted November 18, 2013 Posted November 18, 2013 Do you think that it would be possible that he is just not a texter? I asked him that night why he doesn't ever text me and he was like Huh I do text you. Then he laughed and said I was such a girl and then kissed me. What does that mean?! Duh I'm a girl! It means he knows that kissing you will make you temporarily forget your doubts about him, and you'll make out with him. What a player!
Zahara Posted November 18, 2013 Posted November 18, 2013 Do you think that it would be possible that he is just not a texter? I asked him that night why he doesn't ever text me and he was like Huh I do text you. Then he laughed and said I was such a girl and then kissed me. What does that mean?! Duh I'm a girl! If a guy/girl likes you and texting is their only way to keep communication going with you, they'll deal with it. Besides, if he hates texting, how else would he expect to communicate with you. Doesn't seem like he would be calling either. The only reason he went silent for those two weeks is because he knew he would just get home and resume communication because by then he'll want something from you. What does it mean? It's because he wanted to avoid your questioning because he knows his true motives for not texting you back, so he gave you some lame ass excuse, kisses you and all is well again.
d0nnivain Posted November 18, 2013 Posted November 18, 2013 Do you think that it would be possible that he is just not a texter? I asked him that night why he doesn't ever text me and he was like Huh I do text you. Then he laughed and said I was such a girl and then kissed me. What does that mean?! Duh I'm a girl! He thinks he texts you enough. When he called you a "girl" he was gently teasing you about being needy & clingy for wanting more. If he's still around & kissing you that should be a good sign. However you seem to want / need more contact than he's willing to give you. He doesn't see it as a problem but it may become a bigger issue for you if your needs aren't getting met. Why don't you ask him if he prefers calls over texts. It took me 5 hours to respond to the last text I got from my husband because I was busy & didn't see / hear the text, then it took me a while to get the answer he needed. My delay in responding to him had nothing to do with how much I love him but I didn't see the need to acknowledge the text with an "I'll get back to you" or wait for him to text back "OK". Both were implied by the silence.
nomadic_butterfly Posted November 19, 2013 Posted November 19, 2013 Met a guy at a bar last month and chatted with him for a while. We really hit it off and had a great time. He asked for my number and if I could have dinner the next night. I said no because I already had plans but tried to reschedule with him for the following night. He had a 2 week trip for business which meant that he wasn't gonna be able to make it. He left with my number but I didn't expect to hear back from him since he was gonna be on this trip for 2 weeks. The next day, I get a text from him asking if I really can't make it that night. I told him no. He told me that he would contact me when he got back. I texted him the next day (the day he had the trip) to let him know that I hope he had a good trip. No reply. During those days he was gone I texted him again just to say hi. No reply again. At this point, I figured that he had forgotten all about me and even though I really enjoyed his company, I decided that it was a fun night and that was all there was to it. I had set my mind to forget him completely. Fast foward two weeks, I get a text from him asking me out for drinks. At this point I was really ready to move on and I wasn't expecting this at all since he didn't reply any of my texts earlier. Again, my hopes are sparked up and I decide to go out with him. We had a lot of fun, and made out at several places. No contact from him again. I decided I'd ask him out five days later. He blew me off saying that he was gonna be busy. Feeling deflated and rejected, I called out some friends to go out to meet other people so I could forget about him. Lo and behold who do I bump into. He ditches his friends to hang out with me and we had another great night. Made out and he invites me over. I decline because I had early plans the next morning but asked him if he'd invite me over again. He contacts me asking if I got home safely that night. Two days later, still no contact from him. And all I can think about is him. I can't get him out of my mind, I'm checking my phone every couple of minutes throughout the day and frankly, I'm so exhausted. He's clearly not into me but I fell for him so fast, I don't even know how. Each time we hung out, I felt so much connection, but he clearly doesn't feel the same way if he never texts me. I feel like such a sucker and I can't stop feeling sad about being so rejected. I know I should forget about him but for some reason, I am just so infatuated Go back to the bar, rinse and repeat until desired results are achieved :bunny:
Author cocoaraisinsx Posted November 19, 2013 Author Posted November 19, 2013 I deleted his number. It hurts a lot to be honest, I didn't realize how much I fell for him until I started crying today. I've never been depressed or a sad person but I feel like this is what depression feels like.
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