lewgreen Posted November 17, 2013 Posted November 17, 2013 So my ex of 3 1/2 years broke up with me 5 months ago. i found out a day after we broke up that she has been talking to her coworker romantically and ended up sleeping with him immediately once we were apart. I sent her several hate messages about how she was a liar and never cared about me for a month after we split always followed by an apology message. I was emotionally distraught to say the least. She told me two weeks after the breakup that she wasn't with this guy anymore even though they still worked together. Even though i was so angry at her for what she did i still loved her and missed her immensely. I was completely full of mixed emotions and when i found out she was no longer seeing this guy i started trying to get her back. So to make a long story she started to come over to my house and stay the night to cuddle. We even had sex twice. My mistrust for her never faded yet i was completely addicted to her. i loved this girl so much i couldn't stand to let her go. So we continued to sleep together under the condition that we weren't seeing other people. I would pretty much start hanging out for a week straight then would get too emotionally attached again and ask for her to give us another try to which she would respond that we weren't fit to be in a relationship with anybody right now. i would tell her i loved her and she would say that she loved me but wasn't in love with me. This happened on three separate occasions. After she would deny me i would wait a few days and then ask if she wanted to come over or hang out and then we would end up sleeping together without having sex. after about 3 months of doing this i realized how much i was being used or at least felt like it. One night i was sleeping with her at her house and left while she was still asleep without saying a word. The next morning she ends up texting me four times saying that she was worried about what happened to me and even drove by my house which was thirty minutes away. I eventually talked to her and told her that we should see each other anymore and told her not to contact me unless she wanted to give us another shot. I texted her that night and basically told her to remember the good times. so as the weeks progress i still cant stop thinking about her. Then in exactly a months time she contacts me. She tells me that she just quit her job so i get excited because now she wont have any involvement with her coworker. we arrange to hang out because im weak and couldn't resist. During that entire month apart not a day went by where i didn't think about her. So we hang out and like clockwork we end up in the same bed together that night after driving to the coast. So during the next week we end up having sex 3 times and even went to a concert together. she invited me to go to her moms for thanksgiving and tells me to buy concert tickets for a band playing next month. On the 5th day hanging out i had to work late and didn't have service. she admits to me later that she tried calling me 15 times which i thought was really strange. On the last night we were together, two days after going to the concert, i decided to check her phone in the morning because i had the suspicion that she still wasn't telling the truth. I see a text to the coworker saying that she doesn't want to lose him and another from a couple weeks ago while we weren't talking asking him to come over but not to have sex, that she just wanted to cuddle. I flipped and asked her to immediately drive me home. The whole rest of the day was a mess. I admit to her that i went through her phone and tell her i cant believe she's lied to me the whole time. She tells me she did it to protect me and that the reason she didn't respect me is because she doesn't respect herself. I'm devastated right now and the worst part of it all is that i still love her. What i really want to know and hopefully someone could give me insight is why she was leading me on so much. why did she call me so many times when she thought i was ignoring her. I know i led myself on a bit but i really had hope that maybe this time it would work out. She also has my cat in her possession and im about to move and would like to take it with me. I tried calling her this morning and left her a text telling her that i could take it. She never responded. She's never ignored my text before but now she is. She wanted to be my friend so badly before but after that day she told me that we cant be friends because it just doesn't work. Despite all she's done im still afraid of losing her and i think i just did.
Philosoraptor Posted November 18, 2013 Posted November 18, 2013 She's a pretty good manipulator. She rebounded right away and now is using you to get over you... and to hold her together while she emotionally fights the battle for this other man. Collect your items and start to move on. She's not worth missing and you certainly didn't lose anything. 2
Chi townD Posted November 18, 2013 Posted November 18, 2013 Dude, move on. She actively still seeing this other dude. The moment the two of you became three is the moment this relationship ended. The is no you and her. It hasn't been that way in a long time. Move on dude. Get another cat. let her keep it. Let that cat be a reminder of what she threw away.
Jmk21 Posted November 18, 2013 Posted November 18, 2013 That really sucks man. Really.. You can overcome this. It's her that doesnt deserve you, not the other way around. It's her loss and honestly. If shes that attached to her coworker she probably had something going on with him before your breakup even happened. Sometimes you think you know somebody. But in the end you had no idea who the F they were and if everything was just fake 1
mrlost Posted November 18, 2013 Posted November 18, 2013 Remember you are better than this and you are the prize. Before me and my ex broke up she worked with this guy all summer and ended up kissing him, she then broke up with me the next day and then ****ed him after 2 weeks (that was 3 months ago). I asked if she wanted to work on us again a couple of weeks ago after seeing her again cus of mutual friends. she said no and i never begged or pleaded because you know what it's her lost. It's the same with you, if she doesn't treat you right and chose another guy over you.. then **** her she made the wrong choice, show her that by moving on and being the best version of yourself because always remember you are the prize!
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