how to deal with heartbreak, depression, and having no friends?

[jessiej]

im 18 and i have absolutely no friends.

i use to be popular and social and had a lot of friends, and 3 really good best friends, but then I got into a really abusive relationship and went into a deep depression and isolated myself from everyone and was being abused all the time by my boyfriend, so all my "best friends" left me.

 

I went through the last two years of highschool with no friends because I was depressed and in a abusive relationship and spent all of my time with my boyfriend.

 

He broke up with me about a month ago. He was the only person I had and now I have absolutely no one. He didn't treat me right, but I was so in love with him, and always thought he would change and things would get better. I gave him my all and I don't understand how he could just walk away after everything i did for him?

 

I'm so alone and have no one to talk to and cheer me up and I'm going through so much. How do you cope when you have absolutely no one to talk to and hangout with and you're all alone?

[xUnknown]

How do you cope when you have absolutely no one to talk to and hangout with and you're all alone?

 

You post here. Everyone is here to help eachother. We all know what heartbreak feels like. Its tough. I'm going through it myself, as are many many people on these forums. Just post your feelings and we'll be here for you. I have done the same in my relationship. I pushed friends away because I was with my ex so often. Now is the time to rekindle those friendships, like I have done. Reach out to them, apologize about why the friendship faded away. I did just that. Its helped me a lot, especially with feeling better in such a ****ty situation.

[forgetmenot75]

Do your grieving. It's a natural process, and you cannot skip it. At the end you'll realize you're so much better without him. You already are pointing out how abusive he was and how depressed you were because of this. Nothing could go worse now. Heal and move on. You'll be fine, just don;t contact the jerk anymore. Be strong.

[KatZee]

Swallow your pride and reach out to your old friends. I guarantee they don't hate you, they just didn't want to be involved in your drama.

 

One of my "best friends" is back in her abusive relationship. She was with this guy over a year ago and he's cheated on her up and down. He's verbally abused her, emotionally abused her, not sure if he's ever put his hands on her but with how scummy he is, I wouldn't be surprised.

 

Anyway, I quoted "best friends" because we used to be really close but the second she started dating him he isolated her from her family, and he was bad mouthing me to her, he was telling her that I wasn't any good for her.

 

I was close with her, but she's one of those girls that chose a guy over her girl friends. He gave her the attention she was so desperate for and even though he mistreated her, isolated her, abused her, she stayed with him.

 

I got really tired of hearing her complain about him, how he was always cheating, disrespecting her, how she would find him on dating sites with new profiles. She would use me as a crutch when they were in a fight, and always would say they were done and we'd get together, and then she'd blow me off for him and get back together with him AGAIN.

 

Well, we got together last month and had a great time, but lo and behold, she's back with him. I haven't spoken to her since. I'm done. I'm really done being some second place person, I'm done with her back and forth drama. I just don't need it in my life. I feel sorry for her, but if she can't wake up and realize she's with garbage, then that's her problem.

 

If you and this guy are done and done for good, then reach out. They probably have missed you and would welcome a friendship again.

[reddragon588]

Join Meetup! Great way to meet new people!

[Haydn]

Hi Jessie,

 

Look you are so so young! You have the world at your feet still. Dont get cynical with the world just yet! (Save that for later) A lot of us here have been in one sided relationships that have cut us off from friends etc..Some of us learn later than others, being 18 you have a great chance to not walk into another relationship like this again. Read the posts here on many different topics. As for meeting new people. Have you thought of Meetup as Reddragon suggested. Its very very good and caters for all tastes. Also try to reconnect with your old friends. I am sure they would understand. But dont ever let this guy back in your life! Take care.

 

 

 

im 18 and i have absolutely no friends.

i use to be popular and social and had a lot of friends, and 3 really good best friends, but then I got into a really abusive relationship and went into a deep depression and isolated myself from everyone and was being abused all the time by my boyfriend, so all my "best friends" left me.

 

I went through the last two years of highschool with no friends because I was depressed and in a abusive relationship and spent all of my time with my boyfriend.

 

He broke up with me about a month ago. He was the only person I had and now I have absolutely no one. He didn't treat me right, but I was so in love with him, and always thought he would change and things would get better. I gave him my all and I don't understand how he could just walk away after everything i did for him?

 

I'm so alone and have no one to talk to and cheer me up and I'm going through so much. How do you cope when you have absolutely no one to talk to and hangout with and you're all alone?

[jessiej]

Thank you so much everyone for your kind words! I really appreciate it

A lot of you mentioned to try and reach out to my old friends to reconnect, and I did, but they didn't understand. I tried to explain that I never tried to push them away or chose him over them, I was so depressed I didn't even want to leave my house. They didn't understand and want nothing to do with me, so that idea is shot.

 

As for Meetup I've never heard of it? But i'll look into it!

 

And don't worry I will NOT be going back to this guy, he is a complete liar, cheater, and abuser. It just really sucks that I've lost everyone who was so close to me. And i'm still battling with depression, and I have social anxiety so it's hard to go out and meet new friends.

 

I am trying to go through the healing process, but it is so hard. It has been over a month since we broke up, and I still cry everyday. Him on the other hand, he was sleeping with someone the day after we broke up.

 

Thanks again everyone for taking the time to read, and help me!

[d0nnivain]

Good for you for finally recognizing that the relationship was toxic. I'm also glad that your last post was positive.

 

If you are still in school join a club that interests you.

 

If you are out of school consider volunteering for some cause that you care about.

 

Both will keep you busy & put you in contact with people who share your interests

[jessiej]

thank you, I know the relationship was toxic and unhealthy but I still love him.

I'm not in school right now, im taking the year off before starting college, and also thinking about volunteering at a local hospital to get out and do something.

 

it's just so had, i don't know what I did or why i'm not good enough

[regine_phalange]

I was in a very similar situation as you. Be strong. You are very lucky he walked away. You will realize in some months. Everything will be fine. Maybe not immediately, but it will. It took me about two years to start making new friends. Volunteering is a great idea! You will meet many new people there. Working helped me as well. Don't allow yourself to go back to the ****, even if he comes back (it is very possible he will). You can come here and update us with your news!