all_cats_rgray Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 F.u.c.k iv wasted so much time. It's almost been two years, after a 7 year relationship. I don't know what to say to others, other then. It gets better. Time and NC. This will be my last post. How many posts have you wasted on your ex?
sam-confused Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 I would just like to say I am new one here and haven't posted that much yet. but no matter how much time or posts you have used to get over your ex I don't think you should stop posting if it helps you in some way. you said it gets better in time and 2 years is time but don't make that stop you posting if you still feel you need to. Sam.
MoooOinkBaaa Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 (edited) Two years? What happened in those years? Edited November 15, 2013 by MoooOinkBaaa
overandover1 Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 Two years? My RS was 7 too. Have you met any other women at all? I'm talking to one online but have no interest in them at all. Wooo for the next two years for me too *fist bump* Ha. This is how I feel too. Ok very early days for me since the break up (a week) and it was 18 months. But a very intense 18 months (though I guess everyone says that). I cannot envisage being interested in anyone again because before him I always lost interest in men. What terrifies me is how long it might take to get over him (some say half the time you were together, others say you never really do - oh gee great!) And then I remember what I always say to people who convince themselves they're dying or have some godawful disease when they look up an otherwise innocuous symptom on the internet: no one ever reports on the good stuff. So. although there are people like the OP (who has my sincere sympathy) there are plenty of people who grieved, assimilated, and moved on. Content and peaceful people don't post their stories online as much as those who are hurt, scared and lost. I hope.
Author all_cats_rgray Posted November 15, 2013 Author Posted November 15, 2013 Ha. This is how I feel too. Ok very early days for me since the break up (a week) and it was 18 months. But a very intense 18 months (though I guess everyone says that). I cannot envisage being interested in anyone again because before him I always lost interest in men. What terrifies me is how long it might take to get over him (some say half the time you were together, others say you never really do - oh gee great!) And then I remember what I always say to people who convince themselves they're dying or have some godawful disease when they look up an otherwise innocuous symptom on the internet: no one ever reports on the good stuff. So. although there are people like the OP (who has my sincere sympathy) there are plenty of people who grieved, assimilated, and moved on. Content and peaceful people don't post their stories online as much as those who are hurt, scared and lost. I hope. Okay fine second last post. Seems like you want stories of hope, and yeah, its needed on here. The biggest thing i'v learned, is, learning to be happy with yourself is really the main issue. Its a ONGOING process, but I'm happy with who I am then when I was in this "magical unsupportive relationship". I'v learned it is stages. Do you want to know the end stage. I'm not there yet.... But you do get to a stage that you never ever want to see that person again. And you would never ever take them back. Well and you know its pointless to think about that.. cause they aren't coming back. You get to the stage, where you see. They don't care for you. And never will. So, you stop waiting... start dating. Instead of investing time in the hole of the relationship you thought you had...and think you still have. Your the only one in this realtionship now..btw.. You just get tired, fed up. Your burnt out... OKAY...hope hope hope... The pain goes away. But comes back if you creep their facebook...lol. The thinking about, if...but...if only... goes away. I see a glimmer of hope cause I have a kind of crush on a guy. But I think I just really miss being with someone. IN the end you make it your mission, to become successful, it pushes you to be better, so you can be happy. I'm I happy, alot more then I was when I was with him. Even though I thought I was happy. Yeah I miss him and love him, but its one sided..**** happens. This is all fast thoughts got to go...study for a test.. no more time for the B.S. good luck peace.
Author all_cats_rgray Posted November 15, 2013 Author Posted November 15, 2013 That was a poor post. And I feel like I can give more hope.. You only have so much energy to invest in certain things in your life. I'v invested so much energy in thinking about, why did he leave me, what can I do to get him back, what is love, why i'm I so unhappy. It's like running on a treadmill. And in the end you just get so tired, so fed up, you put your hands in the air and say...f.u.c.k it. I know no one will believe me. I ran on that treadmill for a long, long, time. You think it will never end. What happened in these two year...really nothing. Went to school, came home, when to school, came home. Had a few flings 2/3 that never left the airport. THESE don't help. I just have made it my goal to worry about finishing school, getting a job. Hope i'll be independent soon. GL everyone.
Haydn Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 I dont know how old you are? But 2 years? Leave Facebook today. No temptation. Sounds like you have no trouble meeting other blokes, which is so good. It means you are attractive and guys want to be around you. But if you dont let this ex go it will hinder any future relationship. Mr right could be right around the corner but you would not notice. Good luck. Haydn
reddragon588 Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 I haven't wasted any posts. I find this website to be very therapeutic and helpful. 4
mtnbiker3000 Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 I haven't wasted any posts. I find this website to be very therapeutic and helpful. Me too. This has been the single most effective method of coping. I have basically no live support group, so LS is it. And it helps. A lot!! 3
Author all_cats_rgray Posted November 15, 2013 Author Posted November 15, 2013 (edited) im 26, can't leave facebook its how you trade, pick up shifts at work. I know lame excuses. It's also the whole. You are not going to effect me anymore, I'm not going to leave facebook because of you. It's just a matter of NCing facebook. Yep I don't have a problem getting guys. I don't think thats the point. If I have no problems getting guys, I guess I should be in a relationship. Or maybe I just decided to have high standards meet someone worth my time so I don't end up in another bad relationship. Why should I be in a relationship, would that really help. There are so many wrong reasons to be in a relationship. Being lonely, needing sex. Let's just say i'm looking for a right reason to be in a relationship. Edited November 15, 2013 by all_cats_rgray
jphcbpa Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 not wasted....your pain and sharing is your greatest asset. now it is time to give away what you have learned. time to help others.
Author all_cats_rgray Posted November 16, 2013 Author Posted November 16, 2013 What I have learn is a break up it is like a death to a dumpee. I was so in love. IT IS A DEATH. I figured out that i would never see that person again. and they where okay... with that.. They where/are dead. So after two year yeah...it still hurts. Imagine if your father, or sister passed away. And people where saying to you...well its over.. its time you moved on. They where almost family to me. Even more so cause, i picked them to be in my life. Okay someone close has died.... Don't be hard on your self... give in time.. and don't talk to someone that would rather not have you in their life. They killed the relationship. they are dead to you. loll, advice from the bitter. 1
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