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Convince me to unfriend from FB - I need have to let go but cant

xUnknown

By xUnknown
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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xUnknown Established Member

xUnknown

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You all can read my prior threads, here mainly the last page since thats where my most recent mindset was... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/437622-6-week-mark-progress-slowed-leave-forums-what-your-thoughts

 

She left me at my absolute worst. She wasn't willing to try to work on things, she's selfish, expected me to always pay for things, always complained about her weight (not that she was fat, but put on a few pounds) and would put me into "catch 22" situations, ZERO sex life <15 times I would guess from January-September (see below)...

 

I want to believe she is self conscious about herself and weight is the root of the breakup. She mentioned she isn't happy with herself at the BU. A friend said she feels fat with she is with me (and when we would have sex). I want to believe this is the issue, she sees me as a negative because I'm bettering myself by loosing weight and getting more in shape.

 

I need to cut loose. I just can't bring myself to do it. I know all these things that I stated - and more...but I keep looking at the good in her, and the good times we had, and trying to ignore everything else. She unfollowed me on instagram as I noticed today (I'm sure she did a while ago) as well as SnapChat.

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2fargone Established Member

2fargone

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Gimme your account info. I'll do it for you :)

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mtnbiker3000 Established Member

mtnbiker3000

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ZERO sex life <15 times I would guess from January-September (see below)...

 

Ha!!! That was better than I was getting at the end... :p

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greenfairie Established Member

greenfairie

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Think of this as homework for your healing process. Do it. Its beneficial more than you think now.

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xUnknown Established Member

xUnknown

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Gimme your account info. I'll do it for you :)

 

I think I'm going to have a friend do it for me. I don't wanna break NC by going to her page and seeing **** before I defriend.

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xUnknown Established Member

xUnknown

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How does someone convince you to do it? You have to want to unfriend someone, you have to want to leave them behind, you have to want to move forward.

 

In short - YOU have to do the heavy lifting. No one will do it for you.

 

I know...I do...but there is something holding me back from doing it. That four letter word...hope. I gotta let that **** go.

 

 

Mtnbiker - that's giving it the benefit of the doubt. We were prob once a month.

 

Greenfaire - I agree. I've done my homework on ever other subject...Just have to finish this one.

 

This would be so much easier if I had known I was an ******* boyfriend...I wasn't. I've been a great guy that always treated her right. No bullspit either, I know I was, everyone thought so...regardless of what they thought, I KNOW so. Like if she gave me a legitimate reason, that'd be one thing, but the BS just makes no sense.

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xUnknown Established Member

xUnknown

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I think I'm going to have a friend or my good cousin do it for me tonight.

 

Block her and the her friends that I'm also friends with. Not sure about blocking her parents yet...They still care and love me, I think ultimately I will block them, but I want them to know why I did. I know they still check up on me, because they care about me. Still not sure if I'm gonna send them a message or text about it (only the mom/dad, not the ex - obviously...screw her.)

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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Get up from your computer, walk over to the nearest wall & bang your head on it as hard as you can for 5 minutes. After you stop, take a moment to appreciate how much better you feel now that the pain has ceased.

 

It's the same thing.

 

Keeping an EX as a contact on social media is like banging your head against a wall. It feels sooooo much better when you stop.

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xUnknown Established Member

xUnknown

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Get up from your computer, walk over to the nearest wall & bang your head on it as hard as you can for 5 minutes. After you stop, take a moment to appreciate how much better you feel now that the pain has ceased.

 

It's the same thing.

 

Keeping an EX as a contact on social media is like banging your head against a wall. It feels sooooo much better when you stop.

 

I hear ya...Its not like I check up on her, but knowing i have that ability to, i think in the back of my head is just killing me. I know I can, so I want to, but I don't because I shouldn't. The mental strain it has on me is killing me.

reddragon588 Established Member

reddragon588

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Hey man, just wanted you to know your note the other day really picked me up. I know it's hard but you have to do this. It will be one of the biggest steps you can take, trust me on this. Just do it, and once it's done you'll literally feel a weight off your shoulders.

Winherback Established Member

Winherback

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I hear ya...Its not like I check up on her, but knowing i have that ability to, i think in the back of my head is just killing me. I know I can, so I want to, but I don't because I shouldn't. The mental strain it has on me is killing me.

 

Its just a click of the button dude. Either way, and its not like it cant be undone with another "click of the button". Furthermore, time is not going to stop moving even tho it feels like it has. 2 years from now will happen, you will be there before you know it... And whether she is your facebook friend at that point or not wont really matter.

 

The question is, are you strong enough to keep her as a friend yet never EVER check her page? If you think you are, then remove her and all her friends/family from showing up on your news feed.

 

Do whats best for YOU as a man to be the man. And ultimately that comes from within. Be strong dude, you can do it.

  • Like 1
greenfairie Established Member

greenfairie

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I think I'm going to have a friend do it for me. I don't wanna break NC by going to her page and seeing **** before I defriend.

 

 

 

Click that button! Just go on your friends list and uncheck the box.

All you will see is her profile picture thumbnail and name, nothing else.

If you want, you can always block her picture/name with your hand while squinting your eyes… Lol thats what I do when I don't really wanna delete somebody but I have to

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Ftheeastcoast Member

Ftheeastcoast

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Just do it.

 

You won't feel any different when it happens. A real break up shouldn't have some window you can look into their lives without them knowing.

 

People who think it's immature to delete digital ties after a break up are idiots. Let's keep a photo album of not just you and her relationship but lets also have photos her and her new life on your coffee table. That's ridiculous.

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