30andsad Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 Depends on the relationship and the person. No set times unfortunately.
reddragon588 Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 Exactly 43 days, 5 hours and 13 minutes. 5
Author Socalidude20 Posted November 14, 2013 Author Posted November 14, 2013 It tends to be around 2 weeks it seems but I always feel like I'm holding on to something that's gone too long.
Author Socalidude20 Posted November 14, 2013 Author Posted November 14, 2013 Yeah I always prefer it to find someone fast. Because I would rather not be the one single while my ex is not. It makes me feel I lost in some way.
Mz_sassy_77 Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 Yeah I always prefer it to find someone fast. Because I would rather not be the one single while my ex is not. It makes me feel I lost in some way. Who cares if she's involved and you're not? I don't understand what your saying here. Like you lost a game? Or you lost something special because someone else wants them? can you elaborate... 1
skydiveaddict Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 (edited) I thought I was done with it; and although I don't cry and bitch about it anymore, I must admit I've never really gotten over her completely. Edited November 14, 2013 by skydiveaddict 2
drallafi Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 A year. Every time it's been someone I really cared about, it's taken at least a year. It's happened 3 times in my life. 1
Author Socalidude20 Posted November 14, 2013 Author Posted November 14, 2013 (edited) Who cares if she's involved and you're not? I don't understand what your saying here. Like you lost a game? Or you lost something special because someone else wants them? can you elaborate... No because it's like I guess I want to validate I got over them easily. Basically. Like I don't need you because I can always get someone to replace you. Right now though idk if I even really want a relationship this time around I tend to prefer just being single it's a lot more freedom. I do like having a bf. but I fm honestly get bored of the same guy quite easily. But that wasn't the case this time. Which a small part of me worries if I'll find that. Edited November 14, 2013 by Socalidude20
tooslowatlove Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 It's been 7 months and I'm still not over her.
radiodarcy Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 It depends on the nature/intensity of the relationship. The last one I was in took 10 months and were were together for 2.5 years. But I had a friend of mine who told me it took her a year to get over a relationship that lasted a week.
aybc123 Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 well the two serious relationships id had prior both took about a year to be fully over them. This third one looks to be going the same way. I follow a pretty standard progression as far as i can tell, i've never had a rebound so i dont know how that would change things: 0-2 months grief, want them back desperately etc etc 3-5 months depression, still love them but know i cant fix it 6-8 months sadness/emptiness, want to just be happy again with them or someone else 9-11 months just kind of meh and disillusioned, moved on and ready to meet someone new but not happy on my own yet 12+ months happy on my own again and satisfaction/fulfilment/happiness levels once again depend on life situation rather than relationship stuff. Think im probably just into stage 3 at the moment Basically just transference of grief from losing a specific person to sadness about not being loved by anyone and then to being ok without being needed to be loved by anyone again. 2
2fargone Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 Yeah I always prefer it to find someone fast. Because I would rather not be the one single while my ex is not. It makes me feel I lost in some way. For me it's not about winning or losing. I think my entire life I've been focussed on someone other than myself. Because I'm a caretaker. Having someone else shifts my focus 100%. Her having someone else is a hard line for me, a boundary. In both cases I consider it a final choice. 1
d0nnivain Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 There were times when I was done & over it before I even managed to say the words & end the relationship. Everybody heals at a different pace. I once heard that it generally takes about 1/2 the length of the relationship to get over it. That's as good of an estimate as anything else.
reddragon588 Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 There were times when I was done & over it before I even managed to say the words & end the relationship. Everybody heals at a different pace. I once heard that it generally takes about 1/2 the length of the relationship to get over it. That's as good of an estimate as anything else. I certainly hope not. I don't have another year to dedicate to this crap.
aybc123 Posted November 14, 2013 Posted November 14, 2013 I certainly hope not. I don't have another year to dedicate to this crap. I wouldn't worry about that, i'd say it's probably a good rule of thumb upto a couple of years or so. Assuming you get dumped blindsided (so from a position of fully in love, full commitment) healing time, detachment grieving moving on etc is going to depend on the seriousness of the relationship, this is usually dependant on time (though not always), however, i dont think it's linear. Is a 10 year relationship 10 times as significant as a 1 year relationship? I don't think so. It's maybe twice as significant so the healing time probably goes as some form of a log of relationship time like such: 1 month = 2 months 3 months = 3 months 2 years = 1 years 10 years = 2 years etc..
newmoon Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 I don't think I ever completely get over the situation itself. I'll always remember someone who hurt me and the circumstances surrounding it. How long before I'm over the person involved? About 6 months average.
aybc123 Posted November 15, 2013 Posted November 15, 2013 I don't think I ever completely get over the situation itself. I'll always remember someone who hurt me and the circumstances surrounding it. How long before I'm over the person involved? About 6 months average. Right, you dont forget about it obviously, but at some point any pain associated with those thoughts should go away. I very clearly remember my last two breakups but years later frankly now i couldn't care less, they're just things that happened and it feels like they happened to someone else.
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