Feeling she was the best

[HeartBorken]

I don't know how to explain this. My girlfriend was incredibly sweet but she was also very irresponsible and immature so that would lead to most of the problems in our relationship. Still she wasn't a bad person but she did run away from responsibility (She moved away two months ago and i was suppose to move this month to be with her but she decided to break up because she felt like i abandoned her after i fell into a depression after she left. So we broke up and she left me in $2000 debt. I also sold $3000 of my stuff to clear her debt but i know for a fact she isn't paying that back as well lol.... Stupid me =/ )

 

Anyway it was during the breakup she started acting cruel towards me and i began to see her in a complete different light.

 

My friends and family... even her family.... told me that she is very immature and she needs to get her life together...... (When she broke up with me she said she deserves better and wants to live life and consider her options.......Even though i sold my stuff for her and gave her a place to live when she needed one... I guess that wasn't good enough)

 

I feel like she took me looking our for her as just being boring. I cared about this girl a lot and certain things she wanted to do i did not approve because it wasn't safe. Still i guess she felt i was just making her life boring i guess =/

 

 

So now here i am even though people tell me she was horrible.......... I feel like she was the best thing that could ever have happened to me. I'm overweight so i do lack confidence and i was overweight when i met her..... She was very attractive so kinda shocked me she would be interested in me. We were together for 2 years (Im 20, shes 19).

 

I know she loved me because of how she acted towards me and the amount of trust she had in me. But after she moved its like everything started to crumble......... been broken up for 3 months now. She blames me for the break up and said i made her leave i should just accept responsibility for that.....This hurts so much..

 

 

Still after all this i feel like i won't meet anyway better.... isn't that a shame right =/

[d0nnivain]

Since you mentioned your weight, I suspect it is a factor in your self esteem / lack of self confidence. Everybody's self esteem takes a hit after a break up so you are facing a double whammy.

 

If your weight is an issue take some of the free time you have now & exercise. You don't have to join a gym & become a fitness nut but do something that causes you to move. Exercise releases endorphins which chemically elevate your mood so you should feel better physically & mentally.

 

You will find love again, even if you can't see that now.

[theonlyjuan]

I thought my ex was the greatest girl ever and thought I would never do better, I was wrong!!!!

 

d0nnivain is right, it's your self esteem that is making you think that way. When I met my ex I was way out of my best shape, I was drinking all the time and up to stupid things. As soon as I got dumped I threw myself back into training and look 10x better than when I was with her.

 

I get a lot of girls looking at me and have them start conversations on a night out. More importantly I feel really good about myself, health and looks wise. I no longer see my ex in that way, I have had better looking girls show interest in me since.

 

My ex looks so annoyed when she sees how I look now, she even once said " You look really good " in a text.

 

 

Get a healthy diet and exercise program, you will not regret it! It is probably the best thing you can do for yourself. I let out so much anger during my workouts and felt much better about everything.

 

It was the best thing I ever did

 

I work in a gym, if you want any advice or tips then just ask.

[HeartBorken]

Thanks for the advice. I just started the gym and i have been going well for a bit but suddenly i have this feeling that i won't meet anyone that i will love again (Even though i know she treated me bad. I feel like she was the best thing that happened in my life... I can't seem to shake the feeling off )

[Natasha94]

Well i sure do know the feeling.

But sometimes we need to pick ourselves back up, and hope that someone better will come along. I think all you need to do is go with the flow of things.

Love alone isn't enough you know?

Were you really ready to spend your life with someone imature and who would make you contantly worried? It would have eventually worn you out and made you miserable.

You loved her because she was kind of your opposite, you sound a lot more mature and realistic. To you she was the ideal of fun and adventure. Don't worry plenty of girls like her exist in the world. Just give it a chance!

And please don't make such a problem out of your weight! Sure it's better to feel great in your own skin, to be healthy and to exercise, but still that doesn't mean you should underestimate yourself in any way. Trust me, I'm a girl and I have dated big guys. It's no big deal.

Not all people are shallow.

[bubbaganoosh]

Your not thinking clear right now. Think about what she said to you.

 

She said she deserved better. Was cruel to you. Took advantage of your generosity and walked away from you without any kind of feelings and left you in debt.

 

Now ask yourself with a clear mind. Is that what you would call the best thing to ever happen to you? I think not and sooner or later you'll agree with me. She used you for her own selfishness and when she got what she needed, she dumped you like a bag of trash. That is not the best thing that happened to you. You deserve better then you got.

 

I hope that you get your self straightened out and gain some confidence in yourself. Someday the right girl will come along and treat you the way you deserve to be treated and THEN you'll see that she was NOT the best thing that ever happened to you.