Winterfish Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 My boyfriend and I seemed to have the perfect relationship. Before we started dating we were already really good friends. We had so much in common, and could talk to each other about anything. When we finally started dating, this didn't change. We never argued. And it seemed we both always wanted the same things. Everything was perfect, until he told me he was moving. He only would live 15 minutes away, but he'd have to go to a new school, meaning we'd only get to see each other on weekends. I knew how hard it would be to keep a relationship going if we only ever saw each other once a week, maybe twice. For the most part I was okay with it. He would text me good morning every day, and we'd be able to talk the rest of the day. We'd talk on the phone almost every day. No problems ever really occurred, other than us missing each other like crazy. When we finally got to be together on the weekends, everything would go great. We'd just relax, cuddle, kiss, and just do everything normal couples would. We're both laid back people so we never really did a whole lot. I told him pretty much everything about me, and he did almost the same. I trusted him completely, but I feel like he never really trusted me very much. I should mention however, he had a history of depression, and was still depressed a whole lot while we were together. He told me I was the only thing making him happy, and I could always make him feel better. Him being depressed always seemed to put a lot of stress and pressure on me. I always made sure to focus on him and his problems, and none of mine. As far as he knew I was happy, and never had any problems. Finally, things started changing. He stopped texting me as much, never really called me anymore, and just over all seemed to not want to talk to me anymore. He would still tell me I meant everything to him, and that he missed me. But one day he just got mad at me for no reason at all. I let him cool off and things were okay. But a few days later he started asking me questions that he would never ask me. He wanted to take our relationship further. He asked me where my boundaries were. And how far I wanted to go. We still hadn't been together very long so I was getting uncomfortable. He told me he didn't want to have sex, but he wanted do basically everything else. Not wanting to get him mad, I kind of went along with it to see how far he would actually go. The first thing that happened was he wanted to try sexting. He wanted pictures, and everything else that went a long with it. I told him no, and he seemed to be okay with it. But he still tried sending me uncomfortable messages. Like what he would do to me if we were completely alone together right now. After a while I stopped him, because things were going too far. Again, he seemed okay with it and told me he too was getting uncomfortable. We both agreed to forget it, and delete all the messages. But a short while later he broke up with me. We had plans to hang out on saturday, and were both excited to see each other. But a few days before, he seemed a little off. I called him and we talked on the phone for 15 minutes before things started getting weird. He just kept repeating himself over and over, and seemed to be ignoring me. After a while he asked me if he was annoying me, I told him he was slightly. But he continued doing it. After a while later he asked me if I was mad, and if he should just hang up. I told him no I was fine and that I wanted to talk to him. But nothing happened, and shortly after he hung up saying he had to take a shower, he said goodbye and I love you before hanging up. But literally a few minutes later he was texting me saying he needed to tell me something. He told me he didn't feel the same about us, and that he didn't have feelings for me anymore. He refused to call me again, and he wouldn't give me any reasons why. I asked him about 3 times to call me so we could talk about it. But he said it would only make things worse. I asked him if he was just going to stop talking to me now, and he told me "yea". I am completely confused about this whole thing. It came out of no where. Everything seemed good. I know your feelings don't just change within 5 minutes. I have many suspicious about why he broke up with me, but none of them really seem like good reasons. I just want to know why this all happened..
ponchsox Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 Nobody ever dumps someone without a reason.
Author Winterfish Posted November 13, 2013 Author Posted November 13, 2013 Which is why I wanted to know the reason.
Philosoraptor Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 As much as it sucks, the reason won't change the facts. He's going to keep avoiding it as many dumpers feel like they can limit your pain by saying very little. You're better off going NC and just working on accepting the breakup. You'd do nothing but waste your own precious time by pressing for answers. Start taking care of yourself and fill your time with things you enjoy. Hobbies, friends, family, and anything that will keep you busy and help you find enjoyment while going through the healing process. 1
mammasita Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 There's always a reason - and you may or may not ever know what it is. The best thing you can do is woman up and move forward. You're better off without and can do much better than this "boy" who just decided that he can disappear without an explanantion anyway.
d0nnivain Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 You mentioned he moved & is at a new school. That means he's meeting all sorts of new people. My best guess is that one of those new people has something to do with this break up. He may never tell you that. You may never know the reason but there is one.
kansub Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 Yes, almost similar to my situation though mine is short term relship. I was away for work and initially he was missing me, we were texting etc but 3 days before my travel back, he told me he wanna break-up. I told him, lets wait for 3 days and discuss in person. Can you believe, he broke up with me over skype video call. He told me its not good to fake for 3 days. The reason he told me is he just wanna be single etc. But I came to know of a girl contact he got into during the time when I was away. But he didn't mention it till date So my best guess is, your guy met someone who might be the reason for break-up. May be they have not started relship yet, but that person's contact might have made him to initiate the break-up. I am trying my best to go on NC and ignore him completely but till date its not possible since we work together and see each other a lot at work.
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