helena abadi Posted December 20, 2004 Posted December 20, 2004 told him to stay the f**k out of my life, acknowledged what mistakes i made in the relationship, got real about what the relationship really was about and how bad it got in the two months prior to his calling it all off. No Contact helped a lot. No Contact was a necessary transition which gave space for the death of expectations that were not being met on both sides. guess what, reconciliation is happening. slowly. one step at a time. it is possible. i have learned a hard lesson, and part of that is taking responsibility for my half of all the crap. and i stopped acting like a victim. how many other people get a second chance and make it work??
MassiveAtom Posted December 21, 2004 Posted December 21, 2004 I had a second chance. It still didn't work.
VivianLee Posted December 21, 2004 Posted December 21, 2004 I'm to find out if I get one possibly next week....not in time for Christmas but maybe for New Year's...
Barby Posted December 21, 2004 Posted December 21, 2004 Originally posted by VivianLee I'm to find out if I get one possibly next week....not in time for Christmas but maybe for New Year's... Seriously? WOW Vivian I'm happy for you, please let us know how it turns out. I've been off and on about 3 times with my now ex..I gave him another chance but ended up realizing I wasn't happy enough (not his fault or mine) so I ended it and parted ways for good, the reconciliation gave me closure and made me realize I was right about the initial break-up!
MassiveAtom Posted December 21, 2004 Posted December 21, 2004 Viv, How's the snake tasting? I'm wishing for you, everything you're praying for. Let us know what happens. mA
K.J Posted December 21, 2004 Posted December 21, 2004 Had a second chance after the NC rule ( NC for about 4 years ) lasted another 7 years and then ended.... about to have another one but this time really scared about it not excited as I was the first time, (no not with the same guy) Good Luck
Author helena abadi Posted December 24, 2004 Author Posted December 24, 2004 Thanks, I'll need it. Reconciliation is slow, but some lovely moments, and the jury is still out on whether it can work. At one stage I was desperate for it to work. But now I'm not. The core goodness of the relationship is still very much alive. The problems that led to the break up have to be resolved. Some of them have been. I'm still not sure if most of them can be resolved.
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