for those who are hurting, you will be fine. read and learn

[faithfully]

I read the posts from so many people who spend their nights in agony, and find it hard just to get through the day. I felt something has to be said for those of us experiencing breakups in the present.

 

 

I hope others will realize that there are two-sides to a breakup, as I have. The dumper hurts too; but not always.

 

 

So many people cling to the hope that they will somehow convince the dumper to take them back. Very rarely will this happen. We're mostly terrified of the loneliness, and despise the rejection.

 

 

It depends on the reasons you were dumped, and whether you really need them back. Are they worth it? What about your pride and dignity as a person? Why was it only in their power to decide it should just end? Let them go. Get over them. Take back your power and freedom.

 

 

If the reason you broke up has not been totally resolved to the very last detail, the desperate attempt of a second chance will die a slow and miserable death. You will breakup again, and you're back to square one. All the pain comes back full force. You can't pick up where you left off.

 

 

If someone asks for their space, give it to them. Then prepare for a breakup. Leave them alone, to allow you both to think. NO CONTACT DURING THE SPACE OUT. NONE WHATSOEVER!!!

 

 

Beware of all the fancy books and schemes put out there to feed on your weakness. They claim to have the magic bullet to change the dumper's mind, and have him/her come running back.

 

 

Marriages are more worth saving. You made no vows to be a boyfriend or girlfriend. It is only a verbal agreement, there is no license or legal contract. You don't need a lawyer to move on.

 

 

If they do come running back after "7-Steps," consider that a miracle; and notify the Vatican.

 

 

Most of those claims you see giving the author's of these "GET BACK TOGETHER" books and DVD's big praise; are people paid to endorse his/her product. Negative commentary is simply deleted, or ignored. You will find out the truth, once you're several bucks in the hole. It's hit or miss.

 

The success stories aren't as many as claimed.

 

 

If you're in the process now of trying to get them back, and you've spent the cash only to find out it was all BS, consider it a lesson learned. Dumpers just want to be left alone. They think you're desperate and pathetic. Or just a pain in the ass. Would you want someone desperate and pathetic?

 

 

If you do get them back, does it feel any better than before? Has he/she changed? Have you? How long can you pretend to be "new and improved" before the real you returns? I'll tell you when. The next big fight. All of the past comes back. Who do you think you're fooling?

 

 

Consider any failed relationship a trial. A means to see what you're emotionally made of, and what needs to be tweaked in order not to repeat your past mistakes. Learn from the dumper, remember only the things they said that would improve you. Not the things they said to hurt you.

 

 

CAUTION ALL WHO WERE DUMPED:

 

 

Do not base your worthiness on someone who decided you were an incompatible lover/partner. It didn't work out for the two of you in this particular relationship. If "you" were abusive or insecure, take responsibility and work to change. You don't deserve love until you do. You are doomed to repeat your failure; if you ignore your own weaknesses.

 

 

If you hear the words "you have hurt me" or "I love you as you are" over and over...heed these words. They are a warning to you. People can only tolerate so much of your crap. It doesn't matter if you've been together a week or seven years. If it causes a fight, DON'T DO IT!!!

 

 

As for you happy dumpers. Don't be so smug.

 

 

Carefully weight it out before you break a heart. There is such a thing as compromise and communication. If you don't have the stones to work it out, it speaks loads about your weakness in character. You'll keep dumping until you get dumped on. By the way, thanks for the freedom A-hole!!!

 

 

Someday you'll know how it feels to be rejected, when you finally get dumped by someone "you" thought to be "your" perfect match.

 

 

And when that loneliness takes its full effect; leave your exes alone. They've suffered enough because of you. Your contact will open old wounds. Didn't you say you needed your space? Well now you have sweetie! Piss off!!!

 

 

Go ahead and flaunt how well you're doing after the breakup. Let your ego swell knowing someone is grieving the loss. It will be you someday. Twice as bad, because you were an A-hole about it. That's Karma.

[Natasha94]

Just perfect!