I'mNotYours Posted November 11, 2013 Posted November 11, 2013 I've been reading a lot of the stories here, and it seems like that when a xMM returns after a time with NC, it mostly is to continue the A, and not because he has divorced and now wants a real relationship. So has anyone tried the opposite..that he returned as a single man and ready to start a relationship?
harrybrown Posted November 12, 2013 Posted November 12, 2013 No, because he likes to have his cake and eat it too. He likes getting action in anyplace that he can get it. However, this is not me. You may want to find someone that is available to you and only you.
veryhappy Posted November 12, 2013 Posted November 12, 2013 Look up Summer Breeze's story. Her MM came back divorced, but he had never said he'd leave. They are together now. I would say that in most cases, if he gets divorced without the OW in the wings it's because his W got sick and tired, not because he decided to be done with the M and try with the OW. If you are in this situation, it's best that you work on your life. Even if he gets divorced, it takes years. 1
whereamigoing Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 I've been reading a lot of the stories here' date=' and it seems like that when a xMM returns after a time with NC, it mostly is to continue the A, and not because he has divorced and now wants a real relationship. So has anyone tried the opposite..that he returned as a single man and ready to start a relationship?[/quote'] I suppose I am in this category but not in the exact terms. Maybe it would be better to say I'm headed that way? Our actual affair was a few years in duration a few years back. We did the dday, nc, reunion dance a few times. Then had a good long bit of NC, probably close to two if I remember correctly. When he came back into my life, still married, we had extremely limited email contact only. He lived hundreds of miles away. He had initiated divorce proceedings. For various reasons the divorce issue dragged on and we maintained limited contact. I was in a serious relationship with my boyfriend at the time so I wasn't exactly chomping at the bit to get back involved with anyone else, let alone someone dealing with a messy divorce (no kids fortunately). The divorce is now in its final stages (yes, there is public record of the proceedings) and my relationship with the single guy is moving quickly towards friendship at this point in time, has been for a while and SG knows all about xMM. xMM and I have still not seen each other face-to-face but do communicate on a regular basis via email and occasional phone calls. We are cautiously optimistic about starting a new relationship post-affair, post-divorce, post-everything. It will not be like it was and that's a good thing. I guess time will tell if it will work or not. It's been a long time and an arduous process, his divorce is not the end of the story, just the end of this chapter. Does that address your concerns/questions?
thinkingofhim Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 Red, tell me what that means! I have seen it on a number of occasions and its baffling me because I don't have any knowledge of its connotations......... Crickets chirping in the silence I think...
Author I'mNotYours Posted November 13, 2013 Author Posted November 13, 2013 I suppose I am in this category but not in the exact terms. Maybe it would be better to say I'm headed that way? Our actual affair was a few years in duration a few years back. We did the dday, nc, reunion dance a few times. Then had a good long bit of NC, probably close to two if I remember correctly. When he came back into my life, still married, we had extremely limited email contact only. He lived hundreds of miles away. He had initiated divorce proceedings. For various reasons the divorce issue dragged on and we maintained limited contact. I was in a serious relationship with my boyfriend at the time so I wasn't exactly chomping at the bit to get back involved with anyone else, let alone someone dealing with a messy divorce (no kids fortunately). The divorce is now in its final stages (yes, there is public record of the proceedings) and my relationship with the single guy is moving quickly towards friendship at this point in time, has been for a while and SG knows all about xMM. xMM and I have still not seen each other face-to-face but do communicate on a regular basis via email and occasional phone calls. We are cautiously optimistic about starting a new relationship post-affair, post-divorce, post-everything. It will not be like it was and that's a good thing. I guess time will tell if it will work or not. It's been a long time and an arduous process, his divorce is not the end of the story, just the end of this chapter. Does that address your concerns/questions? Two years? Thank you for your story..and good luck! I hope everything works out for you
whereamigoing Posted November 13, 2013 Posted November 13, 2013 Yes, two years of real no contact. Sorry about that!
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