brokenhearted9 Posted December 18, 2004 Posted December 18, 2004 Hey all. I have been doing pretty good despite missing my ex. I currently am kind of casually dating 3 men at the same time ( not sleeping with though I do admit it's too soon for me to be dating so much. My ex asked me out to his company christmas party and we had a wonderful time and it was great. I told him about the other guys I am dating and I have been playing hard to get saying I want to see what the possibilities are with the new guys I am seeing. I told my ex he should date too , to see if I am the one wants he truly wants to be with or not. I'm afraid of him finding a lot of distractions and forgetting me. My exes best friend kind of made it slip out that my ex wants to take me out on New years and win me over because he's a hopeless romantic. I was telling my ex I have several plans for New Years and am not sure which one I will take up ( this is true, I am just not feeling it as much with the other guys I am dating) . I took it further and was like I think we should stop all contact until the year is over and my ex was like I can't live and not talk to you. he also said that he has grown a lot and he is not looking to put another notch in his belt but wants to settle down because he's 36 and wants a family and that he will only sleep with women he finds wonderful and not use them for sex only anymore because it hurts people. he says he wishes we had waited with sleeping with each other because now we're getting the the point where we love and respect each other for better or worse. Well I have to admit when we were together this weekend for the party I did sleep with him. had wild sex and I tried to play it off with indifference like he was only good for sex. I don't know what I am trying to accomplish. I guess it was to say I can sleep with you just like a man and not be emptionally involved and it was empowering. Anyways I don't know if this will work on him. He is a very good looking man with tons of options. Also I have to put in , he did not sleep with the call girl he hired. He only made out with her heavily and this is from a source I trust. Basically the source says my ex has been missing me a lot and I drive him crazy which is good for him because it humbles him and he needed it. Anyways, by my telling him I am dating others and seriously finding what is out there have I pushed him away or have I made him check himself? I am not sure if no contact does work. I don't want him to forget me. So do I hang out with this guy slowly and win him back that way or just dissapear and risk the out of site out of mind. When I was with him I could have done a btter job of making him feel wanted and I didn't so I am thinking he cannot have fallen in love with me. I want to try again with him but this time not hold back so much. Please help. How do I get him back? He says he hopes out of all the men I am dating if I ever got into trouble I would run to him. He says he wants to date me again. wanted to ask me out but i said I am booked for the year ( that's me playing hard to get so he doesn't take me for granted) That to me says a lot but I guess it could also be him trying to feed his ego by having a hold on me. I am so confused! I just want him to love me for me. How do I find this out and make it happen where we can truly start over again and he will want to put in the effort that he did when we were first dating?
strange love Posted December 18, 2004 Posted December 18, 2004 ha ha funny I have posted to 2 of your other posts Ok you went on a date with him good stuff Well I wouldnt worry about losing him. Just take a breather and appreciatte what you have already accomplished as tommorow is another day and I am sure he will call you, if he doesnt, looks like its more then cool enough for you to call. You can always play the "find an excuse to call" card. I personally think you have done very well, and you just need to keep postive and keep your eye on the prize. The other stuff you posted comes with developing mor intimacy with him and I see that happening in bits in pieces already, ie he telling you about his problems. strangelove
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