AHaze Posted November 10, 2013 Posted November 10, 2013 I'm truly single/emotionally available now with no emotional ties to anybody anymore, and recently I've been feeling... lonely? I'm 22 and recently started a new job and last week for example I racked up 50 hours in 1 week, it's an EXTREMELY physically demanding job so the rest of the time I spent relaxing and sleeping... in time I will streamline into regular working hours and get fitter, hopefully have more time on my hands. So what's different? Well now I have money... Still doesn't solve my insecurities, I still haven't got my nice car, still don't have all of the designer clothes I want, I still don't have my own nice appartment, I still don't have the super cut body I'm aiming for... I don't meet the rule of "loving myself" before loving somebody else, and that is how I ended up losing somebody I loved previously. Since then I've set high personal standards for myself and I won't be satisfied until I reach them. I don't doubt that I'm date-able, and I'm sure I could if I tried, I'm young and attractive... but should I? is it worth it in my situation? I've been single for 18 months.. all that time has been spent improving myself and moving on from my ex, I'm taking huge steps in life (for me, personally) and I'm excited, my future is bright... But I'm getting impatient, I'm starting to feel like I want somebody to spend time with, talk to, have sex, wake up next to... but I know that because I'm in the middle of rebuilding myself as a person, and don't have much free time... I don't currently have much to offer in a relationship besides some money and sex/cuddles at night. I've been talking to somebody recently, constantly chatting/flirting/swapping pictures, all of the things leading up to meeting +more, but I cut it off because I'm insecure and know I'm not ready... I feel pretty down about it. Reassure me than dating right now in my situation is a bad idea, I don't even have much of a life for myself at the moment, so I certain don't have enough of a life to share it with somebody else.. right?
charlietheginger Posted November 11, 2013 Posted November 11, 2013 I was in the same boat post divorce over the last 2 yrs i focuses on work working out and now women have taken more of a interest in me. im still buzy running a little biz i own and eating healty staying in shape. THIS IS IN FACT WHAT WOMEN WANT TO SEE. A guy that can take care of himself finacially physically and mentally stability is a big part of making women feel secure so keep working to improve yourself and never stop. Eventually you will meet someone and when you do she will be impressed you have got your life in order 1
Guitarisgood Posted November 11, 2013 Posted November 11, 2013 Then by all means don't date. It's you're fault you're letting woman get into your mind. Go out with friends, take up a new hobby - maybe two maybe three. When you get home from work and you have nothing to do, you're mind will destroy you with overthinking. Now if you go home, relax, pull out the guitar or go for a run or heck take up something crazy, do you think woman will even cross your mind?
crederer Posted November 11, 2013 Posted November 11, 2013 I find it odd how everything that you posted about feeling good about yourself were all materialistic....just sayin that might be something to think about.
Author AHaze Posted November 11, 2013 Author Posted November 11, 2013 (edited) I find it odd how everything that you posted about feeling good about yourself were all materialistic....just sayin that might be something to think about. Wanting nice things and a comfortable surrounding doesn't automatically mean you're a shallow personality... which is what I think you were trying to suggest? They say money isn't everything, but they don't say it isn't most things, that's because it is. Edited November 11, 2013 by AHaze
Eivuwan Posted November 11, 2013 Posted November 11, 2013 Wanting nice things and a comfortable surrounding doesn't automatically mean you're a shallow personality... which is what I think you were trying to suggest? They say money isn't everything, but they don't say it isn't most things, that's because it is. My Ex was insecure. Then got himself a nice job, a nice body, and a nice apartment. He is still as insecure and depressed as he was before... 1
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