Puma Posted December 17, 2004 Posted December 17, 2004 ok peeps my ex went out with one of her past ex's and hes tryin to pursue her again basically cause he hasnt stopped after they had broek up two years ago. hewas her first, first love, high school sweetheart..and he cheated on her several times and lied. either way..i found it kinda strange thatnow she coudl feel comfortabel enough to hangout with him when he did that to her and she didnt want anythin to do with him. now whywould she alofa sudden be ok with talkin to him, yet aone hangin out with him??? so we have been broken up for a lil over a mth now andive managed to stay with good amount ofno contactor at least limited. for the past week i have made myself completly unavailable to the point where she dont know anythin of me and doesnt know when im online at all. so i checked her page to this one website friends community and she had put another pic of the two of us on it. she has to care or think of meto do so correct? now that her ex is tryin to pursue her by being "friendly" as opposed to how he treated her and made her feel in their past...what should i do? i feel that i should step things up a bit and maybe contact a bit more then back off. he is constantly gonna be pursuin her now i have the feelin so i have to show interest still then back off yes? any help here would be great!! all genders ages feel freee please
Teag Posted December 22, 2004 Posted December 22, 2004 Was it a nasty break up? Talk to her, dont do the no contact thing or she might go back to her ex, even if he did cheat on her, he was her first love & you don't ever completely loose feelings for your first love.
savethedrama4allama Posted December 22, 2004 Posted December 22, 2004 I respectfully disagree with babyblu, I have zero feelings for my first love, except maybe repulsion. No love or sexual attraction. In my opinion, you should let it go. She's your ex now and she can see whomever she pleases, even if its an ex. She knows he's a cheater/liar so its not like you need to tell her this to spare her feelings. If she gets involved with him, she's doing it knowing this information already. Your post kinda confuses me, I mean she is your ex right? Why would you care if she gets back wtih him? Or do you want her back?
munkeygirl Posted December 22, 2004 Posted December 22, 2004 Puma, I wouldn't worry about it too much (lol Im sure you will anyway). There is nothing you can do. Don't go all NC on her, but don't be too availiable either. If your breakup was recent, it is possible that she is just lonely and/or wants some male attention. It doesn't mean that she has feelings for the dude; she is prolly just using him to make herself feel good. I don't know if that makes you feel aby better, but as a female that is my opinion. Good luck!
Author Puma Posted December 22, 2004 Author Posted December 22, 2004 we had a clean break..wanted space, time,wants to have fun, be young..she said she wasnt ready for a serious relationship although why she continued with it is to my surprise. she knows im a great guy and she doesnt want to see me hurt and it hurted her that she couldnt give me what i expected, but i told her i didnt expect anything ironically. either way yes i do want her back or else i wouldnt care..to postup about it. she still has pics of us on her webpageandshe added a new one so that is confusin as well, but i try not to read too much into it but i know it has to mean somethin. kevin, well it doesnt matter who she sees as nothin has come of it..and i hope it stays taht way. she is free to see whoever she likes it just surprises me that she would hang out with someone that caused her so much pain and hurt, either way i have cometo the point where i know that no one else matters cause they dont compare to me and tahts the attitude i have to have. babyblue, i have kept that in mind so i decided on limited contact..she is in mexico right now and i got the chanceto IM her on mon and that went well..i even told her that we should hang out when she gets back and she said alright. im not expectin or even gettin my hopes up about that though. dramamama, the same feeling u have or dont have are what my ex told me she felt also forhim..hes tried to get back withher for over a year already andsheneverwanted to because he was possesive and very controlling, plus he cheated on her more than once. i know i should let it go..but its just beyond me as to how we were so great and she can be distant now..perhaps its her givin herself that space?
Author Puma Posted December 23, 2004 Author Posted December 23, 2004 munkeygirl, thank u and all for ur input into this..i appreciate it tremendously. im tryin to not worry about it too much..cause it could be possible that she could ahve forgave him..but im sure a girl cannot forget those kinds of things right? cause forgivin is one very diff thing then forgettin..at least in my eyes. i know there is nothin i can do, and thinkin is inevitable inthese kinds of situations unfortunately..ican only try to not think so much. she broek up with me..do u still think she has those lonely feelings? its been over a mth since the break. i felt it was gonna be an honest break as i feel that there is a chance in the future, but she says shes not ready for serious relationship right now..i hope and pray its the truth, plus anyone can change their mind. also she is very beautiful and is quite used to male attention..she is a man hater though haha..doenst trust guys and what not..and she has reason not to..i was the exception and she knew that..but why let go of somethin good??
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