lillywaters Posted November 9, 2013 Posted November 9, 2013 Hello there, Tonight I was on our computer and happen a crossed a site for hook ups. I know in the past we talked about spicing things up after we had a friend who talked about his many happenings with his wife and others. He was the first one to say that we didn't need that which is what I was thinking in the back of my own head (and was thankful). I knew he had set up some accounts for us but then we decided not to even try we were happy with just the two of us. I checked out the profile he had set up anyways wondering what he put down, only to see one line that disturbed me a lot. " I had a night stand and it was a disaster" Now he did not state he was with someone else (aka me) and he did not mention when this one night thing happened. It could have been before me or I am now worried what if something did happen. The last half year for four nights I am at college, so its not like I have even been able to keep track of his goings... In a few days will be our 10 year anniversary and I have no clue howto ask him if this happened while we were together or not. We have always been honest with each other.. I could just keep my mouth shut but this is something that could drive me nuts or worry about trusting him. Any ideas...how would you ask when would you ask.. just feeling a bit lost and confused
yellowmaverick Posted November 9, 2013 Posted November 9, 2013 Lilly - I think that you need to just tell him what you found - no tip-toeing around the issue. Watch his reaction closely. 2
whatatangledweb Posted November 9, 2013 Posted November 9, 2013 Open the account, close the window. Then ask him to come see something. Watch his face, open the window , and ask him to explain it. If you don't ask it will eat at you. 1
harrybrown Posted November 9, 2013 Posted November 9, 2013 Ask him today what happened. Show him his comments. How would he feel if you had a one night stand? 1
dreamingoftigers Posted November 10, 2013 Posted November 10, 2013 He'll just lie if the ONS was after you two got together. And since you have NO proof but just the statement from his profile, you'll be stuck believing whatever story he tells you. What I would do is make a fake profile on that website and contact him, pretending you might be interested in the 'arrangement' he's seeking. After one or two exchanges between you both, laughingly ask him what he means by his ONS being a "disaster." That's the only way you're going to get the truth (or a lot closer to the truth than what he'll admit to you if you simply ask him). Cheaters lie lie lie and deny deny deny. This is brilliant. And the most effective way to go about it. Be sure to print off his responses etc. and deliver them to him with papers should you choose to file. 2
Shocked Suzie Posted November 10, 2013 Posted November 10, 2013 He'll just lie if the ONS was after you two got together. And since you have NO proof but just the statement from his profile, you'll be stuck believing whatever story he tells you. What I would do is make a fake profile on that website and contact him, pretending you might be interested in the 'arrangement' he's seeking. After one or two exchanges between you both, laughingly ask him what he means by his ONS being a "disaster." That's the only way you're going to get the truth (or a lot closer to the truth than what he'll admit to you if you simply ask him). Cheaters lie lie lie and deny deny deny. I think this is a great idea, you need to have more proof of what he is doing or he'll just brush it under the carpet and make it seem like nothing 'which it may be' but this way you will truly know Good luck 1
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