hidemyid Posted November 7, 2013 Posted November 7, 2013 Okay so im dating a girl, and I don't even know if I see myself with her for like 'EVER' you know? Like im losing faith in the relationship and its not even 100% her fault, but it is A BIT for sure. Let me explain. Her parents, are 100% EFFED in the head. Shes an adult, she can drink, she can drive, she works, she goes to school, but they manipulate and control her and guilt her non stop. There at a cross roads, and they wont let go of her, even though there making her super depressed and anxious because of it. If she goes out, they call none stop on the phone SHE PAYS FOR, even though she tells them to tone it down. Im not talking, like 2-3 times, im talking like 5-10 times a day to "check on her". She Her mother, has OBVIOUS abandonment / co dependant issues. Her parents ditched her, and worst of all SHES IN DENIAL. She needs councelling, and her daughter (my girlfriend) BEGS HER TO GO WIth her, because she goes all the time to help her with these problems. , I don't know what to do, I wanna leave her because of all this negativity, I wanna confront them and it probably wont be pretty because they wont listen, Im literally so depressed and anxious because the problems with them NEVER STOPS, and im in a relationship with my girl therefore, I maintain one with her parents as well since she lives at home. I don't need this, I feel bad but I might go soon. I don't want her, to have to deal with this alone, but she takes on a lot of her moms characteristics which I cant stand. Idk anymore.
kassy Posted November 7, 2013 Posted November 7, 2013 I would say leave. I mean long term this sounds a disaster. It is making you miserable and there is just no need for all this stress. Go find someone else without the baggage. I know it sounds heartless. But maybe this is something she needs to learn to deal with on her own so that she can grow into an independent person. 1
Author hidemyid Posted November 7, 2013 Author Posted November 7, 2013 I know it feels cold but its coming down to it lately, I don't know if I can handle it.
Balzac Posted November 7, 2013 Posted November 7, 2013 It's not about could you. It's about setting your personal boundaries.
Eternal Sunshine Posted November 7, 2013 Posted November 7, 2013 My parents are like that, my mum is overly attached and texts me on average 10 times a day. Luckily she doesn't call but I silently grit my teeth when she keeps checking up where I am at any point of my day. I managed to cut that down before but now that my mum has serious health issues, I feel bad saying anything. The only difference with me is that I hide it when I am dating someone. I often go to the bathroom to respond to her texts I kind of feel bad for your gf, she is probably too nice to give it to them straight.
Author hidemyid Posted November 7, 2013 Author Posted November 7, 2013 My parents are like that, my mum is overly attached and texts me on average 10 times a day. Luckily she doesn't call but I silently grit my teeth when she keeps checking up where I am at any point of my day. I managed to cut that down before but now that my mum has serious health issues, I feel bad saying anything. The only difference with me is that I hide it when I am dating someone. I often go to the bathroom to respond to her texts I kind of feel bad for your gf, she is probably too nice to give it to them straight. No she gives it to them straight, and she tries hard as hell to get them to go into counselling with her, and they deny they have a problem. The problem is that, its affecting my life now and I feel so bad about it but I just don't think I can handle it, I work multiple jobs, go to school, and its killing my focus and drive.
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