He dumped me via fb...

[Gingerlee]

Hey everyone.

 

Not really sure what posting here is going to achieve.

 

For the first time since my ex (together three years, he left me for another girl whilst I was miscarrying our child, he then went on to get a 17 year old pregnant.) I met a guy that I had real feelings for.

 

He was 25 years old, whilst I am 20. Best first date ever (so thoughtful), best sex i've ever had (Waited till date three) and we connected so much. I stayed around his as often as I could and the minute I left, he'd tell me he missed me, could still smell my beautiful smell and couldn't wait to see me again. For three weeks, everything was perfect. We couldn't stop laughing when we were together, and he said I was the best in bed and utterly gorgeous, he couldn't stop stroking my skin and hair and telling me how beautiful I was. We stayed awake till 5am one night talking about our pasts, he told me about his struggle with drugs and I told him about the baby I lost. He kissed my forehead and told me he'd never hurt me. Then we made food in our underwear and he showered in front of me whilst I sat on the bathroom floor talking.

 

He met all my family, including my aunties and uncles, even sat and spoke with them for about 45 minutes. We were pretty much inseparable, never have I felt more comfortable with someone.

 

Fast forward to last tuesday. I stayed around his and we sat playing games all night, having sex and cuddling. He kissed me hard before I left and told me he'd see me soon. He left the city for a family wedding and I texted him asking him if he got there safely. No response. I figured he needed his space and didn't send any more texts. 6 days pass. He sent a few snapchats and that was it.

 

I texted him yesterday asking if he wanted to come over, as he got home Sunday. I got nothing back. I waited all day and then asked him on facebook if he still wanted to see me (it was very casual, not clingy at all.) He saw the message and didn't reply. I messaged him again asking if everything was okay and he simply said "I don't think we should see each other again." I was so shocked I couldn't even react. I asked him why and he told me he "didn't think we would work." I was absolutely inconsolable and cried until I was physically sick. He said he just didn't think we would work, and when I told him this was the absolute worst time to do this to me (Brother got diagnosed with a very serious illness, and my dog could be dying, which he already knew) he told me not to guilt trip him and I asked him why he was doing this and if he was seeing another girl. He saw the message and didn't respond.

 

I skipped uni today because I was so upset. I bore my heart and soul to him and he did the same to me, talking about his relationship with his family and his abusive past. Why would he have done that if he didn't care about me? I never judged him, and for the first time since my horrible ex boyfriend felt so safe, loved and beautiful.

 

I don't even know what to say or do. I feel so utterly deflated. Am I really so immature like a few people on the dating sub section were saying? I don't know what i've done, but i'm actually heartbroken. I really fell for this guy, and after the misery my ex put me through I really thought I had a shot at happiness.

 

A load of my stuff is at his, what sort of time-frame do I allow to pass before asking for it back? The thought of seeing his face right now fills me with sadness and anger.

Edited November 6, 2013 by Gingerlee

[Frank13]

This is why I am giving up on love. It goes from perfect to nothing for what seems to be no reason.

 

It's all a crap shoot. Seems so random. Never lasts. Someone always gets hurt. It just isn't worth it.

[Keenly]

I'm sorry if I missed this part but how long was it from first date until breakup ?

[movingbackwards]

Well, I'm not sure how long you guys dated. I guess that would be the key here. If you didn't know him very long he could have had some other girlfriend or maybe got back on drugs? Who knows, if you don't truly know the guy then you never can tell. Now if you were dating for a while, sometimes you just have to understand that you just may not be the type of girl he's looking for. It's pretty cowardly to break up with you through facebook but I received similar treatment. Right now you're just going to have to ignore him and show him what he's missing out on. He may never come back. You'll be on your feet again soon I promise.

[Sugarkane]

I've been dumped before because of "not being open enough". But this is exactly why I don't like revealing traumatic past experiences to someone I haven't known that long.

[Fufu]

Hey everyone.

 

Not really sure what posting here is going to achieve.

 

For the first time since my ex (together three years, he left me for another girl whilst I was miscarrying our child, he then went on to get a 17 year old pregnant.) I met a guy that I had real feelings for.

 

He was 25 years old, whilst I am 20. Best first date ever (so thoughtful), best sex i've ever had (Waited till date three) and we connected so much. I stayed around his as often as I could and the minute I left, he'd tell me he missed me, could still smell my beautiful smell and couldn't wait to see me again. For three weeks, everything was perfect. We couldn't stop laughing when we were together, and he said I was the best in bed and utterly gorgeous, he couldn't stop stroking my skin and hair and telling me how beautiful I was. We stayed awake till 5am one night talking about our pasts, he told me about his struggle with drugs and I told him about the baby I lost. He kissed my forehead and told me he'd never hurt me. Then we made food in our underwear and he showered in front of me whilst I sat on the bathroom floor talking.

 

He met all my family, including my aunties and uncles, even sat and spoke with them for about 45 minutes. We were pretty much inseparable, never have I felt more comfortable with someone.

 

Fast forward to last tuesday. I stayed around his and we sat playing games all night, having sex and cuddling. He kissed me hard before I left and told me he'd see me soon. He left the city for a family wedding and I texted him asking him if he got there safely. No response. I figured he needed his space and didn't send any more texts. 6 days pass. He sent a few snapchats and that was it.

 

I texted him yesterday asking if he wanted to come over, as he got home Sunday. I got nothing back. I waited all day and then asked him on facebook if he still wanted to see me (it was very casual, not clingy at all.) He saw the message and didn't reply. I messaged him again asking if everything was okay and he simply said "I don't think we should see each other again." I was so shocked I couldn't even react. I asked him why and he told me he "didn't think we would work." I was absolutely inconsolable and cried until I was physically sick. He said he just didn't think we would work, and when I told him this was the absolute worst time to do this to me (Brother got diagnosed with a very serious illness, and my dog could be dying, which he already knew) he told me not to guilt trip him and I asked him why he was doing this and if he was seeing another girl. He saw the message and didn't respond.

 

I skipped uni today because I was so upset. I bore my heart and soul to him and he did the same to me, talking about his relationship with his family and his abusive past. Why would he have done that if he didn't care about me? I never judged him, and for the first time since my horrible ex boyfriend felt so safe, loved and beautiful.

 

I don't even know what to say or do. I feel so utterly deflated. Am I really so immature like a few people on the dating sub section were saying? I don't know what i've done, but i'm actually heartbroken. I really fell for this guy, and after the misery my ex put me through I really thought I had a shot at happiness.

 

A load of my stuff is at his, what sort of time-frame do I allow to pass before asking for it back? The thought of seeing his face right now fills me with sadness and anger.

 

 

I actually think this is a blessing in disguise. He dumped you out of the blue! Don't date this kind of person who don't communicate properly with you. Having awesome sex and being intimate with you does not mean your relationship will be awesome too.

[Gingerlee]

Turned out he left me for single mother in his home city, didn't even have the respect to tell me himself, and it took me snooping on twitter to realize. I asked for my stuff back and he saw the message and ignored it.

 

Onwards and upwards I guess.