johndo1984 Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 I have trusting issue, because of my past experience. I really like this girl and she told me that she like my personality and would like to get to know me more. I told her that I want to take it slow and get to know each other more. The problem is that, on my mind, that I keep think that she has another person or talking someone behind me.. So lately i stop talking to her.. When I dating someone or like someone, I always have an issue of not trusting them. I agree,she single and she has the right to keep her option open. Should i continue to talk to her or stop? just be her friend?
Assasda Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 I guess you just should just continue to be her friend then. And be everyone else's "friend" You might want to see a professional about your trust issues 1
katiebabie Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 Do you often find yourself assuming that your romantic interest is talking to other people? Or is it just with her? Either way, it sounds as though speaking with a professional might really help you to work through some of your trust issues. In the mean time, if you really can't let those thoughts go - then definitely just stay friends with her. There is no point in getting your feelings or her feelings involved if you cant trust her. I don't know how well you know her, but if your circumstances allow for it, then maybe you should just ask her?
d0nnivain Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 The people who burned you in the past are not the same individuals you are talking to & dealing with now. You have to let people rise & fall on their own merits Trust is earned but you can't start a relationship assuming the other person is already cheating. Keep your eyes & ears open but don't be overly suspicious. Don't give your heart away easily but each day find something positive & affirming in your partner. S/he called me today. We hung out today. S/he said "x". If you constantly acuse the other person of infedility with no basis other than your own unfounded paranoia, you will end up alone. 1
Clay Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 I dealt with this a lot. You have to either get help about this or find a way of letting go of this fear. My brother helped me a lot through mine. He was cold about it but he was right. If a woman is going to cheat then there is nothing really you can do about it. If you focus on it; it will only destroy you and any chance of having a meaningful relationship. Insecurity is really hard to fix once you have been damaged. Find things to help build your confidence. Go to the Gym. Go find fun things to do. Start small and work your way into a active life. Make lots of friends. I know it was hard for me. Still is sometimes. Clay
Author johndo1984 Posted November 10, 2013 Author Posted November 10, 2013 I dealt with this a lot. You have to either get help about this or find a way of letting go of this fear. My brother helped me a lot through mine. He was cold about it but he was right. If a woman is going to cheat then there is nothing really you can do about it. If you focus on it; it will only destroy you and any chance of having a meaningful relationship. Insecurity is really hard to fix once you have been damaged. Find things to help build your confidence. Go to the Gym. Go find fun things to do. Start small and work your way into a active life. Make lots of friends. I know it was hard for me. Still is sometimes. Clay Well I went out w her and finally she told me that am not the only one she dating.. 2 more guys.. I guess my guts is correct. Anyhow now, what should I do? continue seeing her or not? talk to her or not?
Eternal Sunshine Posted November 10, 2013 Posted November 10, 2013 I have trusting issue, because of my past experience. I really like this girl and she told me that she like my personality and would like to get to know me more. I told her that I want to take it slow and get to know each other more. The problem is that, on my mind, that I keep think that she has another person or talking someone behind me.. So lately i stop talking to her.. When I dating someone or like someone, I always have an issue of not trusting them. I agree,she single and she has the right to keep her option open. Should i continue to talk to her or stop? just be her friend? Unless you are exclusive, you should always assume that she is talking to other men. That's just how it works. Don't invest much and stay cautious. Over time you can hope that her connection to you is stronger than her connection to other man. Keep talking to her but talk to other girls as well.
Author johndo1984 Posted November 10, 2013 Author Posted November 10, 2013 Unless you are exclusive, you should always assume that she is talking to other men. That's just how it works. Don't invest much and stay cautious. Over time you can hope that her connection to you is stronger than her connection to other man. Keep talking to her but talk to other girls as well. Ty for your advice. I wont invest to much in her and yes I always stay cautious of who I date. I just don't want to get my emotion and get hurt down the line.
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