coffeeloverx Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 So, I was hoping you lovely people here oculd give me some advice as I'm not quite sure how to deal with this feeling I've been having recently. Ex and I broke up a year and a half ago. We've been NC for 5 months now. (I broke our previous NC when I was in the hospital.) and I would say for the most part, I am over him. I do not have the desire to contact him or anything, get back together,etc. I know it is over, and breaking up was the best thing for both of us. However, recently I have been missing us and what we had. I miss the relationship. I miss holding hands and cuddling and you know, being lovey with somebody and having a "person". It seems like everybody is in a relationship and is so happy and here I am the single lady and I don't know what to do. For me it's the feeling of nostaliga for what I had and a kind of longing for something that I just really want. Does that make sense? Like, it makes me want to cry because I feel so lonely and sometimes i feel like I will never find anything with anybody again. I do have friends, I try my best to have a social life (I work two jobs nad go to school.) and I have been dating casually for the past month, but have yet to find a spark or anything with the guys i have been meeting. has anybody else felt like this or am I just crazy? I'm not quite sure how to deal with it, as I feel like I should be feeling really good right now but I don't.
lindsay1990 Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 I was just going to say nostalgia and then I saw you wrote that. To me you seem in an okay place, you don't want your ex back and you don't seem bothered by the fact that you are in NC and since you aren't speculating/wondering about his mindset, the reasons for the break up, etc I would say you are not stuck on the breakup. It's been a long time since you broke up and you do seem to be proactive in trying to build something again in your life, so I don't think you are hung up or crazy. Honestly? I think you are just lonely in a romantic way. You simply sound like some one who is open, and meaning well and just wants to have a companion again. And you say you feel you should be feeling really good right now, well, for many people, even if the other things in life go well (school, work, socially) there is still a desire for a romantic partner, and if too much time goes by and you are feeling you are a in place where you have things to share with another and would like another to share with you well, you feel what I think you are feeling. My advice is to just be patient. You sound okay to me and just keep dating and don't reminisce too much about your ex. Not finding a spark with a new guy yet is DIFFERENT from missing what you had with your ex. Watch yourself that that is not what's holding you back and once established that it's not then I guess just keep putting yourself out there 1
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