krista28 Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 Okay so recently i went out for a drink with this guy. we work together and I've liked him for awhile ..however i only work there part time . so...we go on a date andd i guess i was saying yhings about how i didn't trust guys because of the last one i dated. he wanted my friend too when he was with me. so he said that i was insecure aand had too many issuees...i apologized and told him i didn't mean to take it out on him. i think I've screwed it up now though and i don't think he's into me. is it true if its not meant to be its not? there any hope ? I guess if he really liked me he'd chase.
d0nnivain Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 Sorry to say but you probably did turn him off. It's always best not to air any dirty laundry or negatives on the 1st date. Learn from this experience & move on.
Ninjainpajamas Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 Guys don't typically like to hear about your issues with men or your relationship problems on the first date as necessarily do women either so try to keep that out of the conversation unless you're just really connecting and flowing with someone. But overall that's a pretty well-known dating foul, makes you look weak, possibly desperate and insecure and first-impressions aren't about displaying those personal issues. However If he was really into you though he would either capitalized on it by giving you some fake empathy "I would never treat you like that, you deserve better" or just saw your vulnerability as an open door to playing on your insecurity...you really shouldn't trust a guy so much on a first date either, even if it's a co-worker, you have no idea what his interest may be or whether he's just going for it because he knows you're interested in him...which is what a lot of guys do because they won't turn down an easy thing. If he's interested you should just remain confident and normal, let him make a move or a gesture of interest, let him ask you out again. But if you're going to do what I think you will because of the way you sound (young, naive, insecure and hopeful) then you'll be all over this guy just to "correct the mistake"...you may have made a mistake but don't let it dictate your emotions and actions from here on out, else that just makes you out to be exactly what he said you were...insecure with issues....and in that case he's likely just to take you for a spin (sex you up) then drop you when he's interested...if he's smart/wise though he wouldn't get himself involved with a co-worker, especially since your so open and vocal about your relationship issues....could easily bite him in the butt especially if he's looking at playing the field with other women at your work and he's not that all that interested anyway, which honestly sounds like the case no matter what he does with you IMO...he's already told you what he thinks of you, and that will never change, he doesn't respect you all that much.
Uwaae Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 I dont understand why you think that anyone that is interested in you would "Chase" you like this is some kind of pepe le pew cartoon show. You turned him off, and he's right, it is insecure, but I think you can get back in his good graces. You'd have to put down your guard and be a little more vulnerable though, and if youre not into that... maybe it is not meant to be
todreaminblue Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 Okay so recently i went out for a drink with this guy. we work together and I've liked him for awhile ..however i only work there part time . so...we go on a date andd i guess i was saying yhings about how i didn't trust guys because of the last one i dated. he wanted my friend too when he was with me. so he said that i was insecure aand had too many issuees...i apologized and told him i didn't mean to take it out on him. i think I've screwed it up now though and i don't think he's into me. is it true if its not meant to be its not? there any hope ? I guess if he really liked me he'd chase. if he does like you truly he will let you know regardless of what has been sadi and done...doesnt seem shy to me pretty blunt let him pursue if you pursue this guy he will run....deb
Uwaae Posted November 5, 2013 Posted November 5, 2013 if he does like you truly he will let you know regardless of what has been sadi and done...doesnt seem shy to me pretty blunt let him pursue if you pursue this guy he will run....deb The thing is deb, she made a bad first impression with this guy
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