The Break Up

[underscore44]

I had posted on here about 3 weeks ago and my story was like many others. After 8 years of dating and being engaged my fiance left me. No warning no sign of problems nothing. I was broken and destroyed and to be honest i still am but here are a few things to help yourself.

 

I Know a lot of you come to these forums to look for help, maybe it's to try and win the ex back or maybe it's to look for support on how to get out of a relationship yourself, move on or maybe you and your ex are reunited and you want to know if it is going to work.

 

No one method is a formula for any one relationship.Every situation is different and unique. I am going to speak a little more on those who have lost someone and are looking for ways to win them back. Will the no contact work, will limited contact work. What if i show them i love them more.

 

My fiance left me 3 weeks ago and i was deeply in love with her and completely blindsided and heart broken. I went no contact and as for speaking briefly over a few texts i left the conversation on terms i felt were right me for.

 

The problem is i think we are all looking for answers to something we can not control which is why we end up here looking for stories of people that may have the answers. I am going to let you in on a little secret.

 

If you go no contact then do so, if you are both strong enough to talk things over like adults, speak clearly about the problems and fix them then do so. If you want to give them space then do so but let me tell you that these are all things that you do not control but here is a key point in helping your situation.

 

The one thing you can control is YOURSELF. Yes i greatly miss my fiance and yes it has been hard on me and still is but I will not let this destroy me because the sun comes up every day whether I choose to do so or not. I have that urge to move forward in my life because being happy is a choice and it is a choice that you must make whether the out come is what you are looking for or not.

 

I do not know what tomorrow holds but i also choose not to fear it. If we sit around living in the past you will only let life pass you by. I cant let you do that you cant let yourself do that. Be the best you can be, go out and have some fun, start to live life again and hell you might even start to enjoy it by accident.

 

I think what i am really trying to say here is don't be afraid of the future. Maybe one day your ex might come back and maybe you two will live happily ever after but to be honest maybe you will find a different path of life that you never thought was possible. Do something with a situation you can control and that is yourself. Embrace yourself and watch what happens because living in the past only hurts you and no one else.

 

Your ex may realize that you have moved on just fine and may actually regret what they have done and come back but by then you may just realize that you are doing just fine without them.

 

Tomorrow you are going to wake up and smile, even if it is a fake one. Tomorrow you are going to say that i will no longer let uncontrolled situations control me. Tomorrow is a new day and damnit if i am going to fear the future when anything is possible.

 

The key to success is believing and starting with yourself

[xUnknown]

Can I buy you a beer? hah this was great. Thanks!

[LostOne08]

This was awesome. Thanks for the pep talk. I'm always amazed by those of you who have the strength to chalk the past up to the past and move forward with this type of attitude. You all are an inspiration to the rest of us who are still trying to cope. My hat is off to you for being able to give this type of insight 3 weeks after the breakup of an 8 year relationship. Bravo.