The Studmuffin Posted November 3, 2013 Posted November 3, 2013 So there's this SUPER cute girl down in the bakery, right now. What do I do? How far do I go in chatting with her? I already started up a tiny conversation, asking about her job in the bakery and what she was studying... wondering if I should return there to talk... or wait until another day, talk to her again... what do you think? how far can I expect to get in a first/second chat?
felicity1 Posted November 3, 2013 Posted November 3, 2013 Every time you go to the bakery chat with her, if possible. But be careful not to stalk her. This will turn her off. If she is not asking you questions or is not so chatty, then you know she's not interested. 1
lovenotwar Posted November 3, 2013 Posted November 3, 2013 Any follow-up yet? If not, you should ask her out as quickly as possible. I have two main reasons for recommending this: 1. Something could change, and you wouldn't have the opportunity to see her again. Don't risk it. Time is not your friend here; spontaneity is. 2. It's creepy and stalkerish to arrange contrived "accidental" meet-ups with a stranger you don't know. By the way, I have some evidence that the 'pickup rate' for chatting up a girl totally cold is like 1 in 10. It's not very good, so prepare yourself to deal with the rejection gracefully and with humor. Don't let the odds get to you though!
truth_seeker Posted November 3, 2013 Posted November 3, 2013 (edited) If she is not asking you questions or is not so chatty, then you know she's not interested. Yes and no. The girl could be very shy and it will take time for her to open up. Light persistence is the key. Go in as a regular, say hi, how is your day, and go. Make her feel comfortable and curious about you. All of the sudden one day, you say hi, she is smiling and wants to chat. I will also add, throw in a nice compliment here and there. If you do, make sure you leave after complimenting her. Something simply and harmless yet sweet. Compliment her on her hairstyle. Example: "Hi, How's everything? [Get your order] The way you styled your hair today looks pretty." Smile. "Have a great day." Leave. Get inside her head that you're a nice guy who is a customer. She'll start to think about you. Then next time in, you smile and hi. Maybe she will open up? Maybe not? Keep the compliments sparse - don't over do it. Edited November 3, 2013 by truth_seeker
Author The Studmuffin Posted November 4, 2013 Author Posted November 4, 2013 I see we have some differing opinions on how fast I should work... which is pretty much what I wanted to ask you about. For me, in the past, urgency has not worked in my favour. I think I come of as needy or pushy. I think I'll give it time and drop in on her from time to time, and hope that a subject comes up on something "we could continue talking about" someplace else, or something like that
mario_C Posted November 4, 2013 Posted November 4, 2013 My bakery has some hot staff too... But seriously, hitting on retail servants is never a good situation. She's basically paid to be nice to you and put up with every kind of sketchy loser man who walks in the door - I'm not saying you are sketchy or a loser per se, I'm just saying what those jobs are all about. It's why you never hit on the bartender, for another example Or not. If you have common interests and get along really well, go for it.
Recommended Posts