Considering selling the jewelry he gave me.

[RespectfullyAlone]

Janni, if you're not sure what to do, then put it in a box under your bed, in your cupboard or some place out of the way. Then you can deal with it another day.

 

I'll say this though, how a relationship ended determines what happens to the stuff. Thus items that were given to me by my most recent ex, only for her to cowardly breakup via a FB msg whilst I was overseas with my Dad on a wilderness camping trip, which she knew about, and also knowing I wouldn't even know about her message for days afterwards until I was back in civilization and able to get on the internet... that says a lot. To then hear she had feelings for another guy, and was already meetings his parents a week or so after she had left me... that says a lot. Thus why would I want to keep anything at all she had given me!? She got me this nice necklace that had both our names engraved on it, and she got a matching one for her as well. I wore it always, I loved it because it was another way to show her how much I loved her. But afterwards, it was simply an empty promise, a piece of metal. I put it away for a few months, and then tossed it in the trash where it belonged. It meant nothing. No amount of time was ever going to make me feel nostalgic for the good times spent with her by looking at that. All I saw was pain, of a life together thrown away by her. I didn't even get a chance to fight for us, or anything, she made the choice for both of us. So F her. And F all the apparent gifts that were given in love. They are all now rotting in the landfill.

 

So Janni, if you don't know what to do with them now, put them away, or sell them if you need the money. But I can't imagine you will ever look upon those things with joy again in your lifetime. And whomever suggested keeping them to give to your kids, that's a horrible idea.

[Janni]

All the reasons why you don't keep any of it. They are "things" that remind you of better times, but pale in comparison to the ugly reality of the person that gave them to you. It's crazy to keep something that reminds you of betrayal, disappointment, etc.

 

Keeping any of it either shows how disenchanted you are with these things or you're unhealthily clinging onto a past better left in the past. Not a good way to move on.

 

Janni, if you're not sure what to do, then put it in a box under your bed, in your cupboard or some place out of the way. Then you can deal with it another day.

 

I'll say this though, how a relationship ended determines what happens to the stuff. Thus items that were given to me by my most recent ex, only for her to cowardly breakup via a FB msg whilst I was overseas with my Dad on a wilderness camping trip, which she knew about, and also knowing I wouldn't even know about her message for days afterwards until I was back in civilization and able to get on the internet... that says a lot. To then hear she had feelings for another guy, and was already meetings his parents a week or so after she had left me... that says a lot. Thus why would I want to keep anything at all she had given me!? She got me this nice necklace that had both our names engraved on it, and she got a matching one for her as well. I wore it always, I loved it because it was another way to show her how much I loved her. But afterwards, it was simply an empty promise, a piece of metal. I put it away for a few months, and then tossed it in the trash where it belonged. It meant nothing. No amount of time was ever going to make me feel nostalgic for the good times spent with her by looking at that. All I saw was pain, of a life together thrown away by her. I didn't even get a chance to fight for us, or anything, she made the choice for both of us. So F her. And F all the apparent gifts that were given in love. They are all now rotting in the landfill.

 

So Janni, if you don't know what to do with them now, put them away, or sell them if you need the money. But I can't imagine you will ever look upon those things with joy again in your lifetime. And whomever suggested keeping them to give to your kids, that's a horrible idea.

 

Thank you both. I agree. I believe these things will always remind me of how horrible it ended. I am still completely shocked at how he cheated on me and everything. Calling me his best friend after cheating on me and leaving me to cry my eyes out. That's not a person I want to built a life with. And it's definitely not the actions of someone who considers me his best friend. I can't believe it.

 

I am leaving the things in a box in the loft for now. Mostly because it will be too hurtful for me to look at the picture from our trip to Turkey, the ring I've worn for our entire RS and still sometimes reach for, the drawing we drew together six months into the RS and all the other things I though promised a life together. The future I dreamed of, thrown away without letting me fight for it. He just threw it away. Forced me out of our apartment, forced me to pay anyway, told me I was his one and only and he wanted me back, he believed in us, while seeing he at the same time behind my back, then choosing her when I found out, harassing me to pay money I don't owe him.. The list is endless..

I don't even get why he wanted to keep the picture we painted together in his old apartment, the card I made him for our 5 year anniversary and the flower his mother gave us when we moved in together. Why'd he keep that? He also wears the neckthing I knitted for him last year. Why? It doesn't make sense.. And how would his new gf (or booty call or whatever) accept that?