LC1JCN4 Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 Hi, hoping you guys can offer some help. I'm 29 and recently decided to try Match. I started exchanging messages with a very attractive 27 year old woman that just moved here to pursue a promotion in her career field. She's very close with her family, so moving 5 hours away showed how dedicated she is to her career. We met for drinks on a Monday, and it went very well. We met 2 nights later for dinner, and that also went well. She on her own would bring up different activities we should go do, and restaurants that we should try, etc. That weekend she went home to visit friends and go to a concert. She called me early that Friday and warned I might get a "Drunk Dial" later. I did get just that after the concert. I was confident at that point. She was to come over the following Wednesday for a dinner I prepared, but she kept calling/texting with work updates and it got so late she couldn't make it. I was nice and understanding and didn't guilt her, although I did make a big effort and was disappointed. We did have plans for that Saturday to go to a sporting event. That also went well. I had made a joke about her favorite hometown team being on a winning streak since she met me and that she should keep seeing me as I'm a good luck charm. She said "as if I need a reason to keep seeing you." We had our first kiss at the end of that date (I'm kind of shy and old fashioned so yea it took until Date #3). All was good and we had plans for Monday to see a movie. Fast Fwd until Thursday...hadn't heard from her since that last date other than some really short msg about her phone getting wet and being in rice. I saw her post a few Facebook posts, 1 even about how the cop that pulled her over that day and had pulled her over a few other times for speeding was cute. I didn't send anything nasty that Thursday, I just sent something about assuming her silence and the fact we had plans Monday and I never heard from her to cancel that she must not be interested. She sent a response saying how her phone was turned off from Sunday until late Tuesday because it got wet (it did basically flood Sunday). She said she was so sorry and wasn't blowing me off she swears and that she had just been so stressed with work. She had to fire several managers below her and she works 14 hour days. She said when things calmed down she'd call me and we'd make plans. I still haven't seen her since the last date and its been a month. She went home for her best friends wedding one weekend, other weekends she worked. I did ask her about a week ago if it wasn't just her busy work schedule and more her just not being interested. She said that she thought I was amazing and that when we first started going out she didn't forsee work getting so crazy and she wasn't sure when it would slow down. She said she couldn't ask me to wait around for her. Seemed like either a polite blowoff or maybe that was sincere and I'd see if in a few weeks or so work did ease up and she'd reach out. All the signs were there she really liked me and I don't see how that could've changed when I hadn't even seen her. Her work stress was legit because she'd post on Facebook late at night about still being working and stressed. Well a little time passes and I see her post about her Grandma having health problems. I send my best wishes to her. I also mention this big family party that was going on that night (last Saturday) and said she was welcome to come. She said she wished I told her earlier cause she just told a coworker she'd babysit that night. I asked her if she'd like to go to one of the restaurants she previously said we should go to the following Saturday (the Saturday 2 days from now). She said tentatively we could but if she could get off work all weekend she was going home to visit her Grandma. She also said in our text exchanges "you're adorable, you know that?" I'm not sure she'd somewhat agree to dinner and call me adorable if she was trying to get rid of me. Anyway...she ended up driving home to visit her Grandma Monday because she went into the ICU. She's staying until tomorrow then coming back here. She said she probably would be working Saturday night now since she missed 4 days of work. She doesn't reach out to me first when it comes to texting. She hasn't called any since the first week or so. She is legit busy with a lot on her plate. However, I do see she's "active with 24 hours" on Match all the time. She has the app, so she at least checks msgs. She also recently added a photo...why would she do that if she was too busy to date? Seems she's still shopping around. Thoughts? I'm being patient and rolling with the punches because I really, really like this one. We had a great time the 3 dates and she's got everything I look for. I'd hate to give up based on pride if she really is interested just needs time to settle into this new job. I've been pretty upfront and given her the chance to say she's just not interested, but she always insists she's just busy and leaves the door open.
TB Rhine Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 A woman will talk a blue streak of bull***** to avoid saying she's not interested in you... the key is not to play along, not to get bogged down in the details. That stuff's quicksand. There's absolutely no way - NO way - that a woman who's interested in you, not only doesn't show up to a date, but isn't able to get in touch and let you know what's going on. (Her phone got wet? There are pay phones. Land lines. She can borrow a friend's phone for 5 minutes. For that matter, if she's a "busy career woman" she wouldn't be able to live without her phone for more than a day in ANY situation). If something like this happens, DO NOT contact her again. Wait for her to contact you, and if she doesn't, so be it. You are handing this woman your balls on a silver platter. 2
Charlie Harper Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 I have a friend who wakes up at 5 30 and runs 8 miles, then goes to make a quick Insanity, and then shower and to work till 3 pm, the eats, and goest to her second job, goes out at 9 pm and I see her at a bar at 10 pm till 12 and her schedule is like that almost always, she is gorgeous and vey smart , but she calls me to say hi almost everyday even I we wont be seeing each other there is communication .... Your case is of someone who likes to keep her options open and have a row of conquests... move on..
Ruby Slippers Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 No matter how busy a guy or gal is, they'll make time for what really matters to them. 1
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