SandL Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 Last night my ex called me and said that he wanted to see me. I said for what, "so I can miss you more?" he said no and the he had road by earlier and wanted to stop but didn't. After a little more convo. I told him to come over and we ended up having sex that was so blissful and brand new. Even as I laid thee looking into his eye and pressing foreheads together I wanted to cry because I love him and I don't know what to think or how to feel. Before we had sex we sat talked about how things were and he said that he's been working a lot and still going to school and thing were going well. But he look so tired, sad and withdrawn and he's even lost weight. After we had sex we sat and talked for a while and as I looked at him I could only think off how much I love him and sent out silent wishes for him to come back. But I didn't say anything I didn't even ask why questions. I just listened and responded to our conversation - he even told me how many times he's seen me since our week-long break up. I've not seen him once and trust me as hard as I've not to, I do looked in every car and hope I see him even if its with a smile and me with a frown ... It was late and he called a cab and as I walked him to the door I just wanted to plead with him but I didn't. I open the door he steps out and I said bye. Then he turned back and came in and kissed me and hugged me like before we broke up and told me he'd see me later. That made my heart jump and I said OK and closed the door. As I walked back to my room I had a Mickey d's grin and laid in my bed feeling victorious. Then I started thinking - our sex last night was the best we'd had. But was that what this visit was all about? Why would he say he'd see me later? Are we going to get back together? Is he ok? I thought seeing him was exactly what I needed but now I'm even more confused because I love him and feel like if he loves me the same he wouldn't put me through this. I woke up in the morning teary eyed because I want him back, I want us back - we were good together. Now there is a big void in my heart and my mind can't stop thinking about him. I haven't called or texted since he left last night even though I wan to. I feel that I shouldn't chase him for answers because he's the one that broke up with me - because so much is going on in his life (which I know for a fact); he should be the one telling me or showing me that he wants to come back. Which I want to say last night was part of him showing me. but I can't think clearly right now because I want him back so bad and I don't want to over rationalize the situation. I don't know what to think, do or say ... HELP! 9
Philosoraptor Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 Hope it works out for you.... but don't be surprised if he slept with you to help him get over you... not back together with you.
Author SandL Posted October 31, 2013 Author Posted October 31, 2013 I told myself not expectations before he came over. I hope it works out too I just don't want to be pushy and I also don't want to wait or waste my time.
Fufu Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 From how you describe, sounds to me like... "hey darling, I'm just here for..... (you know what)" my dear, unless he is really sincerely wants you back (exclude sex), then you should still remain NC.
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