muffinman1127 Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 How do you keep your mind off of your ex when you know he/she is sleeping with other people? I'm pretty much over the phase of wanting to get back together but this still really gets to me sometimes. 1
reddragon588 Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 Having trouble with this too. Just reroute your thoughts. Find something else to focus on whenever those thoughts come into your head. I haven't picked anything super good yet but usually I will just reroute my thoughts to what tasks I have left to accomplish that day. When these bad thoughts come into my head, I say, "That's good, but I have to focus on something more productive. Today I still have to..."
im_thedude Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 Whenever I'm sitting at my computer or in front of the TV and find my thoughts drifting toward my ex in any capacity, I consciously make a decision to change up what I'm doing. Make a sandwich, go play fetch with the dog, video games, a nice drive around the peninsula blasting music - anything. It's not going to erase the part of your memory that knows your ex is sleeping with someone else - eventually you just get over that with time. But as reddragon said, rerouting your thoughts is the best you can do. It seems impossible at times, but you DO have control over your thoughts. 1
ponchsox Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 I stay pretty active between work and working out but the little down time I have makes it virtually impossible not to think about her. 1
BottleofHope Posted October 31, 2013 Posted October 31, 2013 Mind control that's all I'm saying. This is a list of what I did as soon as I knew I had to take charge of the situation. - I removed her feeds from my newsfeed on Facebook but did not block her so that she can see how my life is going, with my great taste in music and interesting things my friends share with me (you can do that by going to their page and there's something you can tweak so that nothing they update or 'like' or 'comment' comes up on your newsfeed) - I removed her from 'seeing me online' on Facebook - And on my iPhone Facebook app, I had to unpin her name or else I could slide the chat to see if she's online - I unfollower her on IG but did not block her (so that she can see how my life is going WITHOUT HER, in a positive way of course, girls, partying, chilling, just doing my thing) - I deleted all chats that we had and the dangling text messages and Whatsapp and other chat apps - I stopped going to her blog and deleted my history so that when I type something I doesn't lures me to click it The main thing is, seeing how she is living life happily without use makes us MISERABLE, reduce your curiosity and manage to control it. I was told by a lady friend that I shouldn't block her from Facebook and other social media sites because we are suppose to act mature and we need to show her too that we CAN live our life WITHOUT them, doing otherwise will only show weakness of not being able to handle the truth that they left you. By removing them from your system such as your phone and such will make you carryon your life much easier, all of it is hard, but doing this will make it just a bit easier. I used to be obsess with checking to see if she's online on her Facebook or what pictures was she liking on Instagram. Leaving text messages only to hope that one day she will reply to what you've sent a week ago. GET RID OF ALL OF IT. Do not initiate any thing through social media, no 'likes', no 'comments', just do YOUR thing, don't care about what she is doing or join in with what she is doing. It made me feel kinda good when she started liking my Instagram pictures even though it might not mean anything but at least she knows what is going on in my life. Remember that if she wants you back, she will have to miss you first, and thats going back to 101, seeing his activities, his pictures, his lifestyle, his cool friends, his interesting hobbies and BAM! She'll start to get interested in what we are doing by ourselves again.
Stryker101 Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 While this thought did hurt like hell at first, it's actually the main recovery reality hit I found when going through the initial breakup phase. Think about it this way. What more confirmation do you need that someone truly is gone than them sleeping with another person? Sometimes the most painful thoughts we have are ones we SHOULD embrace to finally get the affirmation we need. Now is your time to get on with your "activities". 3
Salvatore85 Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 I'll text a friend, sing, work out, go out in my car, run, play with my dogs etc. The moment I start to think about it and get that feeling in the put of my stomach that's when I know I need to have fun in some capacity. I haven't really had much luck dating considering I haven't really tried but a couple times but I would think getting a female friend would help significantly. For me this is the hardest thing as well but I fight it as hard as I can.
oracle Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 You don't You just get more used to it over time. Thats what i learned while living with my ex for 3.5 years and know about it all and talking about it all. How do you keep your mind off of your ex when you know he/she is sleeping with other people? I'm pretty much over the phase of wanting to get back together but this still really gets to me sometimes.
xUnknown Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 If you can't stop thinking of your ex, (I kept thinking about the sex we ussd to have - even though it was less than 20 times the past 9-10 months), I read this tip on here a few weeks ago. Masturbate. Find some good pron - then see if you are so hung up on them. I started feeling "meh" to the thought of her.
2fargone Posted November 1, 2013 Posted November 1, 2013 How do you keep your mind off of your ex when you know he/she is sleeping with other people? I'm pretty much over the phase of wanting to get back together but this still really gets to me sometimes. Oddly enough, I'm not really bothered by that. Sex is sex... It takes place for many different reasons...
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