haggard969 Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 well so its been what 5 days now since i made the mistake of taking her bread crumb bait and sleeping at her house(not having sex) thinking she wanted to reconcile it was just a plan to make her know i was still there . anyways, my attitude towards her has changed slightly from me wanting her back to me hating her completely. i realized she is a coward and pathetic and very immature and a liar karma will get her. as long as i never see or talk to her again i think ill be okay. i wish my city was a bit bigger though. anyways. i cant get her out of my head. i think i will only be satisfied if she comes crawling back saying she made a mistake, just so i can turn her down and make her feel the way i do. i know i probably wouldn't do that but that's how i feel right now. all this thinking is making me tired and giving me a head ache. it sucks because i have no bedroom anymore, or nothing , just this computer so i cant really keep distracted. how do i get her out of my head permanently. i cant even go to the gym i signed up for because supposedly she goes there now too. heres a good video i found this chick explains it kinda Relationship 101: Leaving Someone For Someone Else - YouTube yup im feeling pretty lonely but im finding tones of posts of people screwing up their lives because of the same stupid decision that my ex made, so it gives me some satisfaction. to bad this site doesnt have live chatrooms...
Stealth3 Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Yeah, its called getting a new gf. I'm working towards that since I'm in the same boat....I try to think about her less but I know that its hard unless you have someone else to think of. 1
JDPT Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Your question is the equivelant of "how do I become wealthy overnight?". Essentially, there is no easy way to get over a break up or "forget" someone. It takes work and tons of it, a combination of many things. First thing is to stop wallowing. Indulging in self inflicting pain is clearly no conducive to your recovery journey, you must eradicate the vicious cycle. Know that no one will make you happy by yourself. In other words, the need for substituting the old with the new will only set forth more grief ultimately prolonging recovery. Reroute your thoughts daily, it that becomes too much take it an hournat a time. And if that becomes too much take it a minute at time but rerouting your thoughts is fundamentaly imperative to recovery. Get it all out and talk someone's ear off specially a professional who will render objective and professional advice. Keep busy with productive activities and project ahead. And most importantly don't rely on time. You can wait an eternity and never recover. YOU are the only person who will make this possible no one else. YOU are responsible for your recovery. 3
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 well so its been what 5 days now since i made the mistake of taking her bread crumb bait and sleeping at her house(not having sex) thinking she wanted to reconcile it was just a plan to make her know i was still there . anyways, my attitude towards her has changed slightly from me wanting her back to me hating her completely. i realized she is a coward and pathetic and very immature and a liar karma will get her. as long as i never see or talk to her again i think ill be okay. i wish my city was a bit bigger though. anyways. i cant get her out of my head. i think i will only be satisfied if she comes crawling back saying she made a mistake, just so i can turn her down and make her feel the way i do. i know i probably wouldn't do that but that's how i feel right now. all this thinking is making me tired and giving me a head ache. it sucks because i have no bedroom anymore, or nothing , just this computer so i cant really keep distracted. how do i get her out of my head permanently. i cant even go to the gym i signed up for because supposedly she goes there now too. heres a good video i found this chick explains it kinda Relationship 101: Leaving Someone For Someone Else - YouTube yup im feeling pretty lonely but im finding tones of posts of people screwing up their lives because of the same stupid decision that my ex made, so it gives me some satisfaction. to bad this site doesnt have live chatrooms... In somewhat of what JDPT said, you control your own destiny. My advice is to just stay as busy as possible. Go out, hang out with as many people as you can, and work hard at trying not to think about it. Easier said than done obviously, but you CAN do it. Also, do not wallow in pity and feel bad for yourself. That will just lead to more crap later on down the road. AND FULL NO CONTACT! NO SOCIAL NETWORKS! NO TEXTS! NO CALLS! NOTHING! Let yourself heal man. 5
reddragon588 Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Yeah, its called getting a new gf. I'm working towards that since I'm in the same boat....I try to think about her less but I know that its hard unless you have someone else to think of. This isn't entirely true. It's more important to find happiness from within before entering another relationship. Sit down and ask what makes you happy? Then go out and do it! For me, it was working out. So I renewed my dedication to the gym. It has made me happier! So what makes you happy?
Haydn Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Am i the only guy not to hit the gym! But i agree with this Reddragon. I wanted to enter a new relationship but i am not ready. And i guess not for a long time. Haggard i know what you are feeling. I dont use any other forums just this one and i wont trawl the internet looking for answers. I have been 3 now NC. Its very difficult but i sense there will be an end. Take care. haydn This isn't entirely true. It's more important to find happiness from within before entering another relationship. Sit down and ask what makes you happy? Then go out and do it! For me, it was working out. So I renewed my dedication to the gym. It has made me happier! So what makes you happy?
cristy Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Sorry if i'm bursting bubbles with what i'm going to share but my ex broke up with me like more than a month ago and i've started seeing someone else. He's cute and really nice, always kind and caring... And i still miss my ex lile hell, only quietly. Plus i feel guilty because the new guy might actually get hurt in the future. So yeah, it kind of takes your mind off for a while and it's certainly a self-esteem boost, but it's a poor quick fix...
Chi townD Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Okay dude. This is like, your third thread. Go back and read each one. You'll find that a lot of us are repeating the same thing over and over and over on each one of those threads. The next time you post I seriously want you to say, I understand what you all are saying and here's my gameplan, this is what I'm going to do to heal. Am I faced in the right direction? These are the positive changes I intent to make and I'll keep you all posted on my progress. THAT'S what I want to hear! 1
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