Gingerlee Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 Hello everyone, long time since I've been in this part of Loveshack! I'll try and make a long story short. I met a 25 year old man on POF last Thursday. He took me to the arcade as a first date (as I love games) and then took me for a very expensive meal! (I insisted I'd pay for my share but he wouldn't let me!) We returned to his flat and cuddled on the couch and when I fell asleep he kissed my forehead and turned the fire on for me. It was the absolute best first date ever and we did not stop laughing all evening. He dropped me home and we kissed and it was tender and wonderful. Now it's been 9 days since then and we have seen each other every single day aside from one. He came to mine Saturday and we went for a pub lunch, he dropped me home from work Sunday and I went back to his for a couple of hours. Monday came and I slept around his after work. We had sex and it was phenomenal! We laid awake talking and we shared some very personal secrets. I told him about my miscarriage and he told me about his recovery from drug addiction. He lit candles and told me I had the most beautiful skin and kept kissing my forehead. I told him I was afraid of being hurt because of my past and he kissed me and told me he wouldn't hurt me. We ended up making dinner in our undies at 4am and playing his playstation for a while and then he took a shower in front of me while I sat in the bathroom with him talking. He drove me home before work and even though we'd only had about 2 hours sleep, he told me he really loved me staying at his. We saw each other Tuesday, Wednesday and on Thursday he met my Auntie and Uncle and young cousins as we were at a pub for a birthday. He sat with them and talked with them for about 45 minutes before I went back to his to stay over. We sat playing GTA till about midnight, then we had sex twice. He told I was unbelievably gorgeous and was an insane in bed. We fell asleep holding hands. Friday morning and he seemed a bit off with me. He took me to my Uni and kissed me very briefly and I didn't hear from him all morning. I told him I'd left my purse at his, so he took me back to his and I saw a pair of underwear on his floor when I was looking under his clothes. I didn't say anything because all of his best friends aside from one are female, and I didn't want to act like some jealous shrew. He then took me car shopping again, (we'd been twice) and he kept asking my opinions on the cars, which I thought was nice. He held my thigh on the drive home and I kissed him a few times before leaving. Now it's been almost 24 hours and I haven't heard from him. He spent the night with his female friend (he kept telling me she was talking to her boyfriend all night on Facetime) and he sent me a photo on Whatsapp of her dog. I have texted him three times and whatsapped him twice and he's seen them all and not responded. I'm absolutely terrified that I have seen him too much and it's been overkill. I'm very aware of how immature I sound, but I'm just wondering how to progress now. Do I leave it? Do I respond to anything he sends? This week has been absolute bliss and I'm so terrified that I just wont hear from him again now. (as that has happened to me before ) Thanks for reading guys! x
ExpatInItaly Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 (edited) I'd leave it for now. He knows you've contacted him and he's chosen not to respond yet. Men that come on so strongly tend to burn out quickly, too, I'm afraid. He could very well be dating (and sleeping) other women, which isn't unreasonable given that you've only been hanging out with him for a little over a week. The underwear on the floor and the lack of communication from him don't bode well. In any event, why are you terrified you won't hear from him? You've only just met this guy - don't get so emotionally attached so soon. EDIT: Also be wary of the history of drug addiction. That is an extremely difficult obstacle to overcome, and it tends to rear its ugly head now and again. What did he tell you about that? (ie how long ago, what drug did he use, etc) Edited October 26, 2013 by ExpatInItaly 1
veggirl Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 yes way way way way too fast, wayy too much time together. good god do you guys not have lives outside of a new stranger who comes along? and FIVE unanswered texts? please stop... another chicks undies on the floor, combined with him disappearing, writings on the wall girl. don't rush so fast next time, omg. seriously. 1
Shashasha Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 Definitelt way too fast. Take things easy for now - stop trxting him and be patient. Hope things work out for the best x
Claysmommy Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 Too fast. Hate to say it but I think it's over with. He got what he wanted--which was sex. You gave it up too soon and this is the consequence(no offense). While it isn't the best thing for a guy to move too slow, it also sets off really big red flags when he moves too fast. And since you went ahead with it and got physical early on, he didn't have much invested in you(emotionally) so what's to keep him wanting to spend time with you? Sometimes it's better to keep things balanced--get to know each other, for a while, make sure you're both emotionally invested, and then if you're ready you can move on to a physical level. But getting that physical that soon is really only "ok" in situations where you don't want a relationship, or simply want a FWB. Otherwise I'm not sure what feelings this man could genuinely have for you after only 9 days. 1
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