purplepanda Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 So if you recognize my name and you read a couple posts about a guy from this past summer.. well he finally got tired of me. I think everything I was afraid of before was actually true. He cared more about his friends than me, he acted like he couldn't ever relate to me. I know he made up reasons not to be with me, but he would be sweet and stuff still. Sometimes he picked fights, made me feel like I was untrustworthy and I chose to think that it's because he'd been hurt before. Although I never did anything to do that. Just because his friends told him something about me, apparently, he believed them over me. Then he dropped it. Suddenly he was always busy, too busy to answer his phone and yet when I was around him, he was always checking it. :/ I became aware that he didn't ever ask me about my life or how my day was going (since he was too busy to know about it before). When I said I had a rough day, he never asked about it. Once I fell down in the shower and hurt my shoulder, he never brought it up after that. Just said "I'm sorry" when I did. I know I didn't help things by going to his house to try to talk to him about stuff when he ignored me. He blew me off like 4 times when HE asked to see me. Once I went over there and he said he had stuff to do, he'd see me in a few hours. I'd worked that morning so I waited all day at McDonald's for him. Around 8, when he said he would get a hold of me (his phone broke) on Facebook, I just drove over there. His mom's boyfriend answered the door and said he left after I had that afternoon. I had no way to get a hold of him. The thing is, when I was about to leave, his friend came over and they acted like they were going to move furniture. He could help but oh, I couldn't. His friend even said, "I thought you guys were over?" He said nothing. When he said he would message me, I said, "I don't believe you." He grabbed my face and said, "I promise. I love you." Kept saying he loved me until I said it back to him. He did this to me for 6 weeks. He always said he loved me but needed time, he didn't want to be in a relationship, he had a lot going on. He had nothing going on. He's in high school, all he does is smoke weed with his stupid friends. Now, why am I hung up on this guy? I don't know. When we were alone all those times, just hanging out, talking... I fell for him somehow. Maybe I was that lonely that I just latched onto someone. I was so afraid that he was bull****ting me, leading me on. I was afraid that I was on his hook until someone else "better" came along. He made me feel like I was crazy.. he blew up at me a couple times. Called me a psycho, called me a stalker. Then when he apologized, he blamed it on something else. He called himself an ******* and such. When his friends would text me horrible things or yell things across the street at me, he said nothing. He once ignored me in public when I tried talking to him. He said I embarrassed him when I would try to talk to him when I saw him where I work. Then one day he wanted to see me. My friend hung out with us all day. He would put his arm around me, tried kissing me a lot before I finally gave in. He bull****ted to her and to me. I bought him dinner. Then when I dropped my friend off, we went to his house. We talked for a while. I kept telling him no when he would try something. stupid me, I ended up giving in. I hoped all our bull**** was over. :/ He still didn't have a new phone, so I didn't hear from him the next day. His friend told me he used me for sex but I knew she had a crush on him. She also made up "plans" she had with him and a bunch of other people, and told my friend that it's creepy how I thought we were back together, she wanted me to leave him alone. :/ The next night, my friend showed me the message she sent him on Facebook asking if he was for real about me. He said, "honestly I just want it all to end." "Why don't you tell her that?" "I tried to. I've been nice about it, I've been an ******* about it, nothing works." If he left it alone, I would've known. But he would come back and say he was sorry and he loved me. That night he told me in a "nice" way that we don't work or something... like 5 days later he told me he had a new girlfriend and he's "happy" with her. That night the week before, he told me everything that was wrong with his life.. he told me that I bring **** into and onto his mind that he doesn't need, I drag him down, I bring drama. No drama except when he treated me like **** then lead me on... After I saw a picture of them together, I blocked him on Facebook. I can't see that stuff.. I just feel used and trashed. And like everyone's on his side, watching it happen. Like I'm crazy when I got played. The other day he applied where I work then came through the drive thru when he knew I was working in the window. I had a feeling he wasn't dying for a McChicken. :/ I don't know what it means. I just want him gone, I don't want to talk to him, I don't want to see him ever again. :'( But he's trying to work where I do, he's hanging around there after making it clear he doesn't want me in his life. Then why show up where I would see him? I just felt the need to get it all out.. I gave a lot for this guy and he completely crushed my heart. I should've seen it coming but I wanted to believe the best in him, I felt that he truly might've been confused. Now I see that he lied, manipulated me, didn't care about my feelings, his apologies were total **** and yet I came crawling back. :'( He was borderline abusive to me.
Recommended Posts