testin Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 Didn't see this one coming... Went on a second date with a girl, I kissed/madeout with the girl during the date and at the end of the date she kissed me good night... She seemed interested all night but two days later I text her and ask her if she is busy tomorrow night and she sends me this: "Listen your a really nice guy and any girl would be lucky to have you but i don't think we would work out" I reply saying basically that its fair, i was just trying to be nice because you've been hurt before so i probably came off as boring and wasnt really myself... i also said how i respected that she was straight up with me... then she sends this: "Not to sound like a cliche, but honestly its me. I thought i was ready to move on & i realized it that night that im not. your the first guy i've been on a date with or even talked to since i've been single. Your not boring at all lol, you have everything going for you i really wish i was at that place but im just not. Thank you for understanding. I think your such a nice guy, not the typical douche bag so i needed to be upfront and not lead you on" Not sure how she sees me as a "nice guy" because I laid my game proper, heavy eye contact, kino'd, kissed her during the date and showed a lot of confidence... Anyway after that long text she sent, I acted like it wasn't a big deal and said "Oh ok, no hard feelings. It was nice meting you" She seems genuine and actually emotionally out of it, I knew she had a bad breakup with her ex and she isn't over him... So for now I am going to man up and move on... But I still want to keep the door open incase she gets her ***** together, do I just break contact and hit her up in the future or do I stay friendly or what? I don't see this girl outside my usual routine... ALSO: the date was first dinner then was suppose to be us two meeting up with her friend and her "bf", apparently the guy bailed on her and her friend third wheeled all night... I knew I was fcked because this girl would just get jealous, so i tried to get the friend to like me and i think i failed... I made out with the girl while we were dancing (this was at a lounge/club) and it was basically in front of her friend, i think it was a bad move... she also tried making things awkward between us, then at the end of the night probably said things about me after I dropped my date and her friend off... Basically I'm asking, is my chances with her over for sure? How can I keep the door open? I thought she genuinely liked me but I really don't know now. Is she just being nice or is she being genuine and actually can't get over her ex?? I mean I crept on her twitter couple weeks back and she did post something about her having a dream of her ex and how she is still not over him... Mind you this was couple days after our first date in which she tweeted "ahh just went out on a date, kinda like this guy!" I decided not to creep on her otherwise i'd get crazy about her so i haven't checked her twitter or anything since.
cif Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 It was only two dates and she was decent enough to explain things to you. Most wouldve just flaked. Forget this one.
Ami1uwant Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 You did nothing wrong. You have no chance. things could change later---but its on her. When you come out of a marriage/LTR and it ends rather unexpectedly or it was hard on you it can be very very hard to know if you are ready to date. The only way to know if you are is by going on a date. Likely in her head she was thinking about how this date was and then comparing it to her ex which isnt good to do. It is also possible this is just a line----either she didnt feel it with you or she found someone she has more interest in. Some believe in doing at least two dates to see if there is something or not. If after she didnt feel anything then she said forget dating you. If she has more interest in someone else then she wants to date that person over you. If you go on dates with different women at the same time you will be on this side where you feel you have to decide which one to choose to pursue.
Author testin Posted October 26, 2013 Author Posted October 26, 2013 You did nothing wrong. You have no chance. things could change later---but its on her. When you come out of a marriage/LTR and it ends rather unexpectedly or it was hard on you it can be very very hard to know if you are ready to date. The only way to know if you are is by going on a date. Likely in her head she was thinking about how this date was and then comparing it to her ex which isnt good to do. It is also possible this is just a line----either she didnt feel it with you or she found someone she has more interest in. Some believe in doing at least two dates to see if there is something or not. If after she didnt feel anything then she said forget dating you. If she has more interest in someone else then she wants to date that person over you. If you go on dates with different women at the same time you will be on this side where you feel you have to decide which one to choose to pursue. I believe she was genuine and is actually going through something. She mentioned I was the only guy in the picture and I was aware of her having a bad breakup because of the twitter thing... It was a red flag I ignored and I guess she just isn't ready... I feel like I should disappear till she contacts me, or at least wait a few months to try again...
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