Afraid of going through a break up again. ?

[elizabeth21]

I'm afraid of going through another break up. Idk when I'll meet my next bf and I'm not worried on it cause I'm content with my life right now focusing on work n school. I'm happy right now with God's and my family's love. I take relationships seriously and since I'm 18 I feel like I won't date for awhile because of that unless I meet a guy who can take it seriously too and we can work around our schedules. I feel like the younger I am the more prone I am to go through a break up again.. I'm a giver so I want my effort to be towards something that will last. I just can't turn of my emotions and not fall hard like I did last time. I want to date if the right guy comes, but I'm afraid of getting close to him and then it ending. I'm worried on the risk of him falling out of love with me too. I just like people relationships in general n it'd be hard for me to through what I did again. It didn't break my hurt, but it still hurt. I'd do anything for the people who wouldn't do the same back..

 

Me n my first bf broke up in April after dating over a year. I'm 18 and he's 17. He's now dating this girl who used to be my friend n I still feel anger towards him. Not lovey feelings, but pissed off/hurt/taken advantage of. I led the relationship and I think I just got more mature and needed to be treated better. Everyone said I should've let go of him awhile ago cause he was a bad bf but I liked him too much. I really started to fall for him and I got hurt in the end by not letting go. He used to really care about me but got over me pretty fast. It just bugs me cause in he treats his new gf better and he lied to me saying he wasn't ready for a relationship n won't date in hs again. I gave for nothing. He found someone tho who is just as busy as him and for her he's worth seeing couple times a week. I couldn't do it anymore cause we'd barely talk and I was pulling the effort. I guess she seems easier to deal with to him but she's 17 too and has never had a bf. I know how I want to be treated and I guess I just wasn't worth the fight to him. A real bf would probably work things out if they loved you but I guess that's too much for his age..

 

It sucks having someone give up on you when you could've given up on them at anytime but didn't. Are the first break ups the hardest? I don't want to give pieces of my heart away in relationships so I want to date when I know it'll go somewhere. Cause I seem to fall hard and invest in people. I just remember that sucky grieving process and I don't want to go through it again. I know I need to take a risk but idk if it'll just be another lesson or blessing. When I see him I don't have any feelings but I gueess it hurts a bit when I think of him n her all happy.. Advice?

[Shashasha]

Its so nice and good that you take relationships seriously. That's hard to come across these days. But what i have learnt is that relationships come and go unfortunately... And sometimes it takes many wrong ones before you find the right one. I feel exactly the same way as you do - broke up in april and almost promised myself never to get into a relationship gain! Here I am this month, I just asked a guy out and well - he just wasnt onto the whole thing. I am upset, but life goes on and we need to get over it because we cant base our happiness on guys!! Regarding your ex, he sounds like a complete jerk to me. What i would advice is to remove all contact with him. Do this for yourself / you beed a grip and you have to move on. Your next relationship will come at the right time, when you are ready. Make sure you learn from your mistakes and dont repeat them ahain. You will be fine!!! Chin up and you are stronger han this.