Yesterday Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 I am a bit of a mess this morning. We had a terrible fight last night because we cannot see eye to eye over my so called "cheating". He is petrified that I will cheat on him and I told him to grow up. I told him to pack his bags and leave if he makes this situation all about him. I am fed up on being the patient dutiful wife!!!! I told him that how he feels is NOTHING to what he has and still is putting me through! Sorry about your fight, and what you must be feeling at this moment. I have to side with those saying he wanted out, and was using this rather petty situation to use as an excuse to check out on you. It sounds like he jumped at the opportunity to leave following your suggestion. Spend time with your son, reach out to family, and family friends for companionship and support at this difficult time. If he should return, be strong, do not show anger and stand your ground that you have done nothing wrong here. His issue of mistrust lies with him! good luck 1
BetrayedH Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 It's an incredibly difficult choice to make but I don't personally think he left you much of a choice. This will either wake him up or you'll be on the way to the divorce you need. Stick to your guns on this argument. 1
Author silverline Posted October 27, 2013 Author Posted October 27, 2013 Oh my God!! He is still cheating on me!!!!! Been told this morning that he was seen with a woman last night and they held hands at one point! Apparently he looked upset and she reached for his hand. He took it and they held hands for a good ten minutes!!! They left together. Oh Jes@s that hurts:( That's not a friendship is it?! Plus the description fits with the woman he had an affair with. That bast@rd!!! Filthy disgusting pathetic man! I hate him I hate him I hate him!! Only last night he sent me a text saying that he is sorry and wants to come home. I ignored it. What a hypocrite?!! I want out of this stupid farce of a marriage! I have lost all respect for this pathetic man. I don't know who he is! He has made me feel so stupid!!I want him out of my life!!! Dear God I feel like hurting him back now. I need to calm down. I want out but I want revenge. I have been through so much sh@t and this is how he repays me?!! He is not gonna get away with this. There will be consequences for his selfish actions!!!
Author silverline Posted October 27, 2013 Author Posted October 27, 2013 OMG I am in a rage?!! I feel awful:(
Author silverline Posted October 27, 2013 Author Posted October 27, 2013 I haven't text him back as yet. Don't know how to play this. I feel like embarrassing him back. Maybe I should stop being mature about this and give him a taste of his own medicine. Maybe I should call that guy and cheat! Then tell my husband that I want a divorce as I no longer love and care for him. Maybe I should pretend that I have been having an affair for an entire year! Make him feel stupid also!
Yesterday Posted October 27, 2013 Posted October 27, 2013 Oh my God!! He is still cheating on me!!!!! Been told this morning that he was seen with a woman last night and they held hands at one point! Apparently he looked upset and she reached for his hand. He took it and they held hands for a good ten minutes!!! They left together. Oh Jes@s that hurts:( That's not a friendship is it?! Plus the description fits with the woman he had an affair with. That bast@rd!!! Filthy disgusting pathetic man! I hate him I hate him I hate him!! Only last night he sent me a text saying that he is sorry and wants to come home. I ignored it. What a hypocrite?!! I want out of this stupid farce of a marriage! I have lost all respect for this pathetic man. I don't know who he is! He has made me feel so stupid!!I want him out of my life!!! Dear God I feel like hurting him back now. I need to calm down. I want out but I want revenge. I have been through so much sh@t and this is how he repays me?!! He is not gonna get away with this. There will be consequences for his selfish actions!!! Sorry for your deep pain, at least now you know his ED and his other rants about you were lies and his defense. He disliked your honesty because he knew he couldn't be honest back to you. He has likely been in contact with her all along. The best revenge is to stick to your guns and begin a new start for yourself and your son. Seek the advise of a lawyer and start protecting yourself financially. If the women is married, let her husband know how he is being betrayed too. Reach out to close friends and family for support. Take care of yourself.
Clay Posted October 27, 2013 Posted October 27, 2013 Silverline, As much as you want to hurt him that way its not worth it. You are a better person than that. Just file for a divorce and find someone that will treat you like you deserve. I am proud to say in my life I have never cheated on a woman and never will. I have more respect for myself than that. Clay
BetrayedH Posted October 27, 2013 Posted October 27, 2013 Ugh. First, please DO NOT have your own affair. It will never leave you if you do. I have plenty of ideas for revenge and they're probably all bad. But I do recommend you read all of the posts by peaksandvalleys. She's our new local hero in that department. For the time being, I would not let on that you know anything (get yourself rational first). But I wouldn't have him come home either, unless it's to get his things off the lawn -- or the other woman's lawn (oops, there's one of those bad ideas). 1
BetrayedH Posted October 27, 2013 Posted October 27, 2013 Oh my God!! He is still cheating on me!!!!! Been told this morning that he was seen with a woman last night and they held hands at one point! Apparently he looked upset and she reached for his hand. He took it and they held hands for a good ten minutes!!! They left together. Oh Jes@s that hurts:( I would bet that he dismisses this event as having called up his old friend, the OW, to get advice and consolation on his marriage since you "cheated" on him. He'll say that nothing happened, which might be true - wouldn't surprise me if she shrugged off his fishing attempt and then he texted you about wanting to come home. Regardless of the reasons/excuses, I hope you get free of him.
atreides Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Oh my God!! He is still cheating on me!!!!! Been told this morning that he was seen with a woman last night and they held hands at one point! Apparently he looked upset and she reached for his hand. He took it and they held hands for a good ten minutes!!! They left together. Oh Jes@s that hurts:( That's not a friendship is it?! Plus the description fits with the woman he had an affair with. That bast@rd!!! Filthy disgusting pathetic man! I hate him I hate him I hate him!! Only last night he sent me a text saying that he is sorry and wants to come home. I ignored it. What a hypocrite?!! I want out of this stupid farce of a marriage! I have lost all respect for this pathetic man. I don't know who he is! He has made me feel so stupid!!I want him out of my life!!! Dear God I feel like hurting him back now. I need to calm down. I want out but I want revenge. I have been through so much sh@t and this is how he repays me?!! He is not gonna get away with this. There will be consequences for his selfish actions!!! First, i am sorry. As for revenge, just give him a D. He seems like a guy that wants "cake" don't let him have it. But build a case with more proof, don't let on you know and serve him the D peaksandvalleys style.
BetrayedH Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 Time for an update, silverline. How are you holding up?
Author silverline Posted October 29, 2013 Author Posted October 29, 2013 Hi I have been busy sorting out my life. I called him eventually and pretended that I didn't know a thing. I asked him very sweetly where he was that night and he replied with "Stayed in with a friend all night". He mentioned one of his male friends. Liar liar liar. I responded by telling him to sort his life out because we are divorcing. He was shocked. So I told him that I knew he was out with a woman who sounded similar in description to the woman he had the affair with. He went silent and then eventually said yes that was the truth but nothing happened as he was just talking to her.I didn't want to hear anymore. I am done and dusted with him. Respect is gone. I don't even love him anymore. I cant live with a man like that. I am divorcing him. And do you know what? I actually feel a sense of freedom?!
Author silverline Posted October 29, 2013 Author Posted October 29, 2013 Last straw for me. I am trying to cry but I am so tired of feeling the way I have been for the past year. I look forward to a new beginning.
BetrayedH Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 I had the same sense of relief once I decided upon divorce. It was like, "Oh thank God that's finally over." Considering that he's still lying, I think you made a great choice. And yes, start looking forward to your second life. It's very liberating. Thanks for the update; I was concerned for you.
underwater2010 Posted October 29, 2013 Posted October 29, 2013 I am so sorry you found yourself in this position. I figured he was either really worried about you having a revenge affair or it wasn't over with his OW to begin with. If you need to talk with people we are here for you!!!
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