FoxMulder1 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 (edited) Hey im here looking for some advice. I've been with my girlfriend for the last year and there has always been many red flags that told me to just get the hell out of there but i stayed regardless because she always knew what to say to make me feel guilty and that i was the problem not her. You could say my feelings for her are bordering on resentment and hate because im in love with a liar. About a month ago she was picking fights with me and i never understood her reasons, she was always saying how awful i am and that i drove her to depression and because shes depressed she cant help it if she speaks to me like im a piece of ****. After picking all these fights she used it as a reason to speak to her ex but to do this she went behind my back, used a different account and spoke to him, i waited to see if she would admit to what she was doing and after about a week of talking to him she came over and said she spoke to him, she says her reason was that if she didnt speak to him she would have killed herself, how can i ever question that. She then began reeling off lies about how he told her to go back to me because i love her but thats so far from the truth, she refferrred to me as nothing more than a friend. She rarely makes an effort to see me because she wont go out anywhere and its a hard job getting her to come over. I expressed to her i was feeling down because i miss spending time with her, miss her company and her reply to this was that im uninterested in speaking to her and then she disappeared and stopped speaking to me. Out of curiosity i checked her hidden account and there she was speaking to him again, 5 minutes after picking this fight with me shes talking to him like nothing is wrong all the while i sit upset. She came back online a couple of hours later and at this point she had both Facebook accounts running so she could speak to us both. She began saying how i make her feel like shes not good enough and that i dont appreciate her and now she wants to be alone because i'd be better off if she died and that the future she see's for us involves me been with someone else. When she said she wanted to be alone i asked is this her leaving me and would she like me to not contact her anymore, she said she didnt know and that she didnt want me to stop contacting her. Ive stuck by her this past year no matter what and in return she treats me like a piece of ****, she lies to me and i cant believe that she has any sort of respect for me. We are a same sex couple and im her secret and everything i say or do isnt good enough, ill never be good enough, its like walking on egg shells. She thinks shes sneaky and boasts about how she never feels guilt for anything, every fight ends the same way, her saying shes on the verge of leaving me. I'd love to confront her about the ex thing, when she tells me shes not speaking to him and that he told her to go back to me because i love her. Id love to just say, your a liar and knowing you are makes me question everything. She buys me a lot of stuff, recently a kindle and im grateful for the stuff she buys but she throws it in my face a lot about how much she spends on me and really the presents they dont make up for how she treats me, how she makes me feel. Ive put off confronting her out of the simple fact i dont think she would care if i did, its easy for her to manipulate me and if i confronted her? even threatened to leave her? i believe ehe would replace me in a day and that breaks my heart because im the only one sitting here crying about it, scared of losing her. To be very honest to treat someone the way she treats me i cant possibly see how she can love me. She has no idea i know about the other account, she just happens to be a creature of habit that i found it. Any advice? Edited October 24, 2013 by FoxMulder1
salparadise Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 Any advice? Your post is a catalog of negatives that you can't fix. My advice is to gather up whatever self-respect you have left and do what you already know needs to be done. it's not like you're merely concerned about some little annoying thing... the whole relationship is dysfunctional and it's destroying you. Lies, betrayal, lack of respect, emotional blackmail, no remorse, uncaring and unwillingness to take care of your needs... what else do you need to know?
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