Sugarkane Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 Call me cynical but I haven't seen many success stories on here. I think people are happier when they move on. 2
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 Call me cynical but I haven't seen many success stories on here. I think people are happier when they move on. The ONLY success stories (that is in the realm of getting back with an ex) that ACTUALLY happens are when people MOVE ON from the previous relationship and change as individuals before somehow reconnecting later. Until THAT happens, then people will continue to live with false hopes, sleepless nights, and unwanted dreams. 2
Fufu Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 Personally I feel that success reconciliation comes unexpectedly and it's not something that one holds a high hope and start to neglect oneself.. this will eventually lead to all the crazy emotional feelings. Back then, I shared my story on being dumped by my previous ex that I dated 3 years and during the healing process, I did have the huge hope that he will return to me some day... nope he didn't at all. What's past was past and I accepted the reality. What surprised me most was my another ex that dated about 6-7 years came back into my life and we are together now. It's an unexpected reconciliation and both of us had never hope/wanted/wish that we were ended up together. Yes we talked about what led us to break up and we don't feel like we are stuck in the past. It's a total brand new relationship. So as long as one just gotten a serious heartbreak from a relationship, don't put so much hope into reconciliation. Some things are truly beyond our control, especially controlling the feelings/actions of another person. But, we can control ourselves whether we want to move on or stuck ourselves in the messed up situation. 1
h0000 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 when they get back together they probably wont come back posting things anymore cuz they dont need the forum. so you dont really see any stories.
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 when they get back together they probably wont come back posting things anymore cuz they dont need the forum. so you dont really see any stories. You'd be surprised
hurts2death Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 because if you think like that you will always find someone better...and then an even better will come your way....that is what it is...what makes romance...loving your special one and never thinking about temtation... i dont know you might be correct but just in my opinion i am sick of this western civil influence...relationship aint a product...Why is two people getting back together after a break up a success story? What about meeting someone new, someone better, and having an awesome relationship that sh**s all over the last one? That sounds like a success story to me. And one that has a much higher likelihood of happening...
h0000 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 because if you think like that you will always find someone better...and then an even better will come your way....that is what it is...what makes romance...loving your special one and never thinking about temtation... i dont know you might be correct but just in my opinion i am sick of this western civil influence...relationship aint a product... nah..if they dumped you then most likely they arent the special one. and there will be better ones cuz they are better than your ex who doesnt love you and dumps you.
sambo77 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 So two people should just stick it out, no matter what, even if they're unhappy? That sounds like hell to me. Better to move on and allow both people to find someone better suited to them. You can't stay in a relationship forever just because you loved someone once. By all means, work at a relationship that has gone stale. Strive to save your love. But if it's still not working after that, love is also about recognising when to let go. No one person is perfect for us. But by the same token, you can't stay with someone who is wholly unsuitable for you just because you think it's noble. An ability to recognise this means that you have a better chance of finding the person who is almost perfect for you and sticking with them, and rejecting relationships that are less than that. Your last relationship was not the one for you, John. And the next one might not be either. But if you pay attention and learn the lessons, eventually the right one will come along and it'll stick. But staying in a relationship that's no good, is stupid. Yes, aspiring, I'd completely agree with this. Shows you, we do align on some things huh
melell Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 I consider my bu a success story. But not in the getting back together sense. When two people break up there is usually a reason to justify it. Even if that reason is a ridiculous one. Usually if the reason was good enough to dump, it is good enough to make them stay away. One thing that I don't understand is why would you want to get back with someone that walked away, and picked something else over you. Why would you take them back and be the second choice. It makes no sense. The dumpee makes so many excuses for the dumper sometimes.
barky2 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 Sure they do, I got my ex back. After a year. It wasn't until we both moved on that we came back together. Barky
crazybestie101 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 Sure they do, I got my ex back. After a year. It wasn't until we both moved on that we came back together. Barky Wow, so you maintained NC for year? Did she reach out to you first? if yes , after how many months of NC?
barky2 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 God no, I broke it so many times. I've told my story a million times, I'll say a few highlights but you cannot find any hope it in. Ours was unique like yours is. Together 10 years, I left, regretted it, she played me like a fiddle until I gained self respect back and told her to get lost. 2 months nc I get the inevitable text. The trick is to move on and let go and revive your true happiness. Once you no longer care about it, and mean it,many doors open. Barky
crazybestie101 Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 God no, I broke it so many times. I've told my story a million times, I'll say a few highlights but you cannot find any hope it in. Ours was unique like yours is. Together 10 years, I left, regretted it, she played me like a fiddle until I gained self respect back and told her to get lost. 2 months nc I get the inevitable text. The trick is to move on and let go and revive your true happiness. Once you no longer care about it, and mean it,many doors open. Barky LOL , sorry Barky to make you repeat the story. Well as far as current situation i dont think he wants come back to me. He is too busy chasing other girls. He doesn't want to listen to me , he doesn't care about me. I guess someone have brainwashed him about me. So whatever i do , He think it's all fake. So i am kinda tired now and lost hope in him
JoelBarish Posted October 24, 2013 Posted October 24, 2013 God no, I broke it so many times. I've told my story a million times, I'll say a few highlights but you cannot find any hope it in. Ours was unique like yours is. Together 10 years, I left, regretted it, she played me like a fiddle until I gained self respect back and told her to get lost. 2 months nc I get the inevitable text. The trick is to move on and let go and revive your true happiness. Once you no longer care about it, and mean it,many doors open. Barky I thought you said that when they try to contact you, ignore it. How did you know that you should respond that time?
barky2 Posted October 25, 2013 Posted October 25, 2013 I thought you said that when they try to contact you, ignore it. How did you know that you should respond that time? Only respond when their intentions are clear, and if it's something you Absolutley want. Don't respond to crumbs. Only " I fked up I want u back" but only respond if u want to go down that road again. Barky 1
melell Posted October 25, 2013 Posted October 25, 2013 God no, I broke it so many times. I've told my story a million times, I'll say a few highlights but you cannot find any hope it in. Ours was unique like yours is. Together 10 years, I left, regretted it, she played me like a fiddle until I gained self respect back and told her to get lost. 2 months nc I get the inevitable text. The trick is to move on and let go and revive your true happiness. Once you no longer care about it, and mean it,many doors open. Barky This x100000000. You have to move on and let go and get yourself back. You get to a point where it doesn't matter either way, and you can be happy with any outcome. In my case my ex came back, but I had moved on enough to know that he was bad news for me. The outcome successful, because I am happy. (If I am correct on the story) Barky moved on, let go, they grew, ultimately were still compatible and the feelings still there. The outcome successful. Or, someone moves on, lets go, never talks to the ex again, they get themselves back. The outcome successful. They can be happy. When I was in my hopeful stage I searched and searched for stories of reconciliations, it was a difficult reality to face- the common factor was always moving on first.
barky2 Posted October 25, 2013 Posted October 25, 2013 This x100000000. You have to move on and let go and get yourself back. You get to a point where it doesn't matter either way, and you can be happy with any outcome. In my case my ex came back, but I had moved on enough to know that he was bad news for me. The outcome successful, because I am happy. (If I am correct on the story) Barky moved on, let go, they grew, ultimately were still compatible and the feelings still there. The outcome successful. Or, someone moves on, lets go, never talks to the ex again, they get themselves back. The outcome successful. They can be happy. When I was in my hopeful stage I searched and searched for stories of reconciliations, it was a difficult reality to face- the common factor was always moving on first. This is the light that everyone needs to see, it took a loooooong time before I realized what I'm preaching. I've made more mistakes then each and everyone one of you. But I finally saw what everyone was saying here. I finally got my self respect back. I THROUGHLY enjoyed life. Who cares if she came back or not. I truly couldn't care less. Get there y'all. Barky 4
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