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She doesn't want a relationship, now


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Posted

So I've known this girl for like 2 months. I really love her. I saw her many times as she's a relative (my parents and hers just started to hang out together recently that's why I didn't know her before). Anyway, we had a lot of close moments (she always stays with me even when our parents are sitting together, we find a place to have some close moments, I touch her, she touches me, etc) and we've been chatting since the beginning. My biggest mistake was that I showed her so much love and caring so she was sure that she won't lose me. She even told me that if she was sure that a person loves her then she'll never worry about losing him and she'll stay as she is. Yesterday, we went out with my sister and a friend and her. We sat on the back seats me and her. I tried to touch her , she accepted first then she didn't let me do that. When coming back, I let my sister and the other relative to enter our home, then I told her to wait for me so we can talk. I told her if we can be closer, meaning whether she can become my girlfriend. (This is the second time I ask her; first time was on WhatsApp(a chatting mobile application)). So she told me that she doesn't want a to be in a relationship for now. I asked one more time and she insisted. Then we went in and we sat at the balcony. I was sad and I showed her. She tried to touch my face and then she came and kissed me and she said let's stay friends for now. I asked her before whether it is personal (she doesn't want me?) or she just doesn't want to be in a relationship. She said the latter. We're now at the same university and I just saw her today and we talked normally. How do you think should I act? Oh and she said that she really loves me but not the love that I want, if you know what I mean. So yeah, how should I act? Should I give her some time?

Posted

What do you mean relative? Like a cousin? Man stop it!

Posted

Maybe you need to get out a little more and meet some girls that you aren't related to.

Posted

What is your relation to this girl? Cousin distant cousin or relative?

 

I will advise after I get this information..

Posted

Buddy there's no easy way of saying this, but you've been friendzoned.

 

Next time don't "show so much love and caring". Not only cause it sounds kinda icky when you post about it, but also cause that doesn't give her any reason to take it further.

 

Why buy the cow when you can milk it, and having it rub against you all the time, tell you how awesome and amazing etc. you are for free?

  • Author
Posted
What is your relation to this girl? Cousin distant cousin or relative?

 

I will advise after I get this information..

it would take ages to explain how related she is. Very very distant.

  • Author
Posted
Maybe you need to get out a little more and meet some girls that you aren't related to.

 

 

i hang out with loads of girls.. i love her though.

Posted

You hang out with lots of girls? So they friendzoned you too?

  • Author
Posted
You hang out with lots of girls? So they friendzoned you too?

 

not really.. there is a girl who wants me but i don't want her. i just love this one..

Posted
it would take ages to explain how related she is. Very very distant.

 

Well you better get to it and explain. Is it blood? Elaborate on the relation?

  • Author
Posted
Well you better get to it and explain. Is it blood? Elaborate on the relation?

 

 

To be honest, I don't know. So distant.

Posted

Yes at this point in time it's way to late to show this woman any interest. In fact if you keep showing her interest and she thinks that your trying to be more than just friends than she could very well be offended. Be careful.

  • Author
Posted

I just want someone to tell me how to act. Should I make her feel that I still care about her?

  • Author
Posted
Yes at this point in time it's way to late to show this woman any interest. In fact if you keep showing her interest and she thinks that your trying to be more than just friends than she could very well be offended. Be careful.

 

You mean too early?

Posted
You mean too early?

 

No, you've known her for a while right?

 

2 months is too late IMO.

  • Author
Posted
No, you've known her for a while right?

 

2 months is too late IMO.

 

What to do then?

Posted

Are you sure this has nothing to do with you being relatives? When reading this, I wondered if she was possibly embarrassed about making this public. Even if you guys are distant cousins or whatever, this may be embarrassing to express to family and friends who are aware that you are relatives. She may just not want to go further because of the possible negativity associated with your relationship. Also, you need to do research on how you two are related before taking this further. It's okay to love your relative, but not okay for a sexual and romantic relationship.

Posted
What to do then?

 

Learn from your mistakes and find another woman.

 

When you're interested in a woman you need to gauge if she is interested in you at all and then you need to send her subtle hints right away. Waiting longer than a couple weeks is usually a ticket to the friend zone.

Posted

It's over, she already said to you she does not like you, in the way you like her.

At this point there's nothing you can do to change her mind.

  • Author
Posted
It's over, she already said to you she does not like you, in the way you like her.

At this point there's nothing you can do to change her mind.

 

You're right. But her eyes don't say so. I think mbee is kind of right as well. She insists on the fact she doesn't want "right now". And of course I don't want the relation to be sexual at all.

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