B1989 Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 Today is three months nc. Besides subliminal "singials" on her behalf through her blog I haven't heard from her. Today I had a dream about me break nc which is now making me miss her However ,the feeling has been their since day one. I know I shouldn't look at her blog, but would it be breaking nc if I do? Idn what's wrong me with me today I guess I want to be let down.
Author B1989 Posted October 21, 2013 Author Posted October 21, 2013 Also my motives today weren't going to Be a phone call or anything. I just wanted to see her "blog" because I still miss her.
forgetmenot75 Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 The third month itch. It's the worst. Keep it strong and don't contact. Your brain is playing a little game with you, don't let it mess with your healing. I made a mistake of reconnecting after three months and I'll regret it for life. 1
headinthecloud Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 You have not been NC if you're reading her blog. NC is zero contact - no web searches, no reading her posts on social media, no asking friends how she is, nada! Everytime you hear or read of her you go back to day 1. You must cut her out of your life completely. You can't heal and move on until you do. Be strong. Have faith in what will be. There is someone else out there but you need to heal and get healthy again.
headinthecloud Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 The third month itch. It's the worst. Keep it strong and don't contact. Your brain is playing a little game with you, don't let it mess with your healing. I made a mistake of reconnecting after three months and I'll regret it for life. Agreed. The 3rd month is very very hard. Especially if you hear from them. Do not give in!!! You will regret it.
Author B1989 Posted October 21, 2013 Author Posted October 21, 2013 Yeah. Idn why I'm acting manic. Thanks.
headinthecloud Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 Yeah. Idn why I'm acting manic. Thanks. You're going through a BU. it's part of the process. Love is a drug, and it's proven that your body reacts in a similar way. So when you're denied love you go through a withdrawal process. It will pass. Read the breakup recovery guide - it will help you understand. Breakup Recovery Guide
Helloprincess Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 The third month was def the hardest for me. I was driving myself crazy. Please, remain no contact. Do it for yourself. I did it to survive. I did it because it is then only thing you Have to stop getting more hurt. I stayed firm to my decision. He even texted friday and yesterdat, breadcrumbs, and i have ignore! You can do this!!!! Stay strong!!!!
Fufu Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 Today is three months nc. Besides subliminal "singials" on her behalf through her blog I haven't heard from her. Today I had a dream about me break nc which is now making me miss her However ,the feeling has been their since day one. I know I shouldn't look at her blog, but would it be breaking nc if I do? Idn what's wrong me with me today I guess I want to be let down. First of all, don't read her blog and gradually you will kick the urge of contacting your ex.
Lightyear Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 I'm 2.5 months since break up, and just yesterday broke NC and strayed onto his FB page (I know I should delete him, but haven't quite summoned the courage, plus I don't want him to think that I care that much, instead I removed all connections, see no alerts, and rely on my own will power to stay away). Breaking NC was HORRIBLE, PAINFUL, HORRENDOUS, AWFUL!!! DON'T DO IT!! It sent my mind into a whirl of despair, heart racing, felt sick, making up my own narrative, a whole set of horrendous scenarios, none of which are probably true, and the point is it doesn't matter if they're true or not, because it's over and he has his life and I have mine. Learn from my mistake and hold out, resist, fight the urge!! You'll just set yourself back. I know I am going to try as hard as I possibly can to have the strength to not break NC again!! Hang on in there!!!!
aybc123 Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 Honestly I sometimes feel this NC stuff is a little cultish. Yes it works and may speed the process but implying you cant heal without it is ridiculous. All you need to do is not contact her, the rest will take care of itself over time and rebuilding your life. My last breakup after I told my ex i needed some time away and not to contact me for a while. I'd check her Facebook several times daily, look at all the old photos etc, even snoop on her mutual friends to see if there were any new guys. As a month or two rolled by I couldnt be bothered to look at the old photos anymore, id check her facebook every other day and not bother digging until anything had changed. Then as my life picked up around me I would just visit her page every now and again and i would not have an overwhelming urge to check if there was someone else in the picture anymore. Then before i knew it after 6 months I hadnt looked at anything in a month and hadn't thought of her at all for entire days at a time. After about 6months she did get back in contact with me via text to see how I was doing, saying she missed me. And I replied that it was good to hear from her rather than ignoring the attempt to reconnect or misinterpreting it as wanting to get back together. I wasnt totally over her but I was enough to be ok. We began emailing again sporadically (still do to this day 5 years and 2 relationships later) and it didnt make the universe explode or me fall in love with her again. Now she's a valued friend and someone I have absolutely no romantic feelings for (and havent for about 4 years) and couldnt imagine being with. Moral of the story, do NC if it helps, do it a bit if there's bits you cant bring yourself to but dont get indoctrinated by it. The two things that actually help a person move on are time to get emotional distance (not talking to someone is actually useful) and filling your life with new things/people/experiences to replace the old. So go ahead and check her blog if you want to, one day youll be able to read it if you want and not worry that it's bad to whether you do or don't look now.
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