catgirl Posted December 9, 2004 Posted December 9, 2004 hi all, 7 weeks ago i met a guy he gave me his number to call him but i dont call guys and he asked me out several times and i said no..then made a bet if he could figure out where i worked i would go for coffee and even pay.anyways 2 days later flowers show up at my work note said i take mine double double,so when i got home i called him he was so surprised i called.we went out for coffee and had a great time he asked me out again and it took me several days to decide if i wanted to but i did.. we both just got out of bad relatioships 6 months ago and are really scared about how intense this is for use we get along great and have a great time together and the sex is the greatest for the both of us.. he told me hes very sweet on me.well its been going great,he calls everyday and told me last night he feels guilty if he doesnt,i said why he said he doesnt know why.we like seeing each other alot but were both afraid of getting in a full blown relationship even though we act like we are.we both are only seeing each other and no one else even though were afraid to say exculsive.so i said if were not means if another guys asks me out i can say yes (just testing him to see where hes at) he said that worries him and he thinks about it...ive even had panic attacks over this.all other guys i dated this summer after a few dates id run like hell..but with him i felt like it but didnt same for him..so my question is..is there hope for us? are we just scared ****less about whats happeneing and afraid to get hurt again. were both on the fence and afraid to let our feelings out to much..im not sure anymore..tkx signed scared to death
SexiiPinkLadii Posted December 9, 2004 Posted December 9, 2004 Sounds like you've met a great guy. Just take things slowly and see what happens!!! Don't let your scared feelings ruin what you've found. Just relax and take things for what they are. Don't rush and look to put a title on what you two share. Just enjoy it!
LucreziaBorgia Posted December 9, 2004 Posted December 9, 2004 Sounds promising. Enjoy it, and don't overanalyze it. Nothing kills a budding relationship faster than overthinking it.
NatoPMT Posted December 9, 2004 Posted December 9, 2004 you sound just like me 6 months ago, i was petrified. the reason you are both so scared is that you have an intensity of feeling there, you wouldnt be scared if you didnt think the other was something special - its a great start it means you are both feeling the same and feeling this could go somewhere. i agree with the others, keep things slow, make sure you are right together and one step at a time. this is v good, enjoy it and relax!
Author catgirl Posted December 9, 2004 Author Posted December 9, 2004 thx guy.....that helps alot......last night i mentioned he needed a haircut and when was he going to let me cut it he said no,i said i see how it is dont trust me he said not so....he has someone that knows how he likes it..then i go to work today and guess who showed up....him..i said wht the change of heart..he said to please me....omg im scared to death cause i think i may be falling for him...he made me take money for the cut i gave it back but i ended up with it.....he lissed me in front of my partner and clients and will be here soon to take me out to dinner...we both scared to death but not running so far....i think hes great and i know he likes me i just hope we can get over our fear...tkx guys....any other advice would be great!
Author catgirl Posted December 23, 2004 Author Posted December 23, 2004 Hi guys, need more advice again, my last post.http: //www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=362731#post362731 Well its 2 months later we still seeing each other alot 2-5 times a week and everything is great.but last night on the phone i asked if he was coming over tomorrow night and thats when the conversation changed into "you know we were going to keep this casual but its looking like its getting serious relationship and i don't want that right now cause I'm scared said it has nothing to do with me at all he loved being and spending lots of time with me but he's scared" oh and he's done this least 3 times now. he says that but acts like we are in a serious relationship..me so confused!!!I said you cant hold past relationships that were bad against me cause if i held them against him i would of ran long ago and i tried twice to break it off cause i was scared and he talked me out of it..he still calls everyday to see how my day was and on his days off he's here or we go out and we have a great time...but I'm getting confused again cause hes scared and says its not as casual as he planned thats its getting serious and he's not ready or wants that atm...so what am i to do? and a while back like 3-4 months ago i went out with a guy who i liked but we decided to be friends till he cleaned up his baggage i have a post about that too..now the last 2 weeks he calls and says he's got his life straightened out and baggage taken care of and wants to start dating me that he thinks about me all the time....so do i see what happens cause the other guy is to scared to have a committed relationship and wants to keep it casual even though its really not causal and see what happens with the other guy...i like the both of them alot..so now I'm torn on what to do.HELP!
LucreziaBorgia Posted December 23, 2004 Posted December 23, 2004 Originally posted by catgirl so do i see what happens cause the other guy is to scared to have a committed relationship and wants to keep it casual even though its really not causal and see what happens with the other guy...i like the both of them alot..so now I'm torn on what to do.HELP! Since the guy is so intent on making sure that you know that it isn't a 'committed relationship', maybe you could tell him that since it isn't committed - would he mind if you two took a break from each other and dated other people? It would definitely be worth it to talk to this guy about it - whether or not you decide to go out with this other guy. Be honest with him. Just let him know that a timid, scared, unsure, and non-committed thing isn't something that you want to trap yourself in. As long as you keep yourself in this situation, you are losing out your chances at meeting really nice guys who WOULD want that type of relationship with you.
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