LeXii Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 My ex and I dated for 3 years but we were friends long before then. It's been almost 2 months since he left me and I still cry when I think about him sometimes. He contacts me every 2 or 3 days probably looking for some kind of friendship like we used to have and can't seem to stop myself from texting him back. Every once in a while I even initiate contact myself. I usually keep it short and lighthearted and I always end the conversation when I realize what I'm putting myself through but by then it's too late. He's a good guy and he always treated me well so it's hard to find an excuse to leave him alone. I almost want to be friends but I'll never see him that way again. Also my best friend is a very good friend of his and she says he misses me sometimes but mostly he's ok. It breaks my heart because I still miss him every single day.How do I just ignore him and walk away from everything? I know it's the only way I can get over him but I'm not sure where to start.
Helloprincess Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 I sweetie. Listen to me: i was in a relationship for 5 years. We were the best couple ever. Obviously had our issues like everyone else. He dumped me out of no where via text message. I was super hurt. You can only imagine. I am still hurt, to be honest. The first thing i did after braking up was to stop everything. I deleted him on facebook, then i deleted my facebook. And i just cut all comunication. You know how hard it is right? Me honestly, i was so hurt, betrayed, sad, depressed that the only thing i could do was to stop hurting myself more.... After 4 months of complete silence, he wrote to me to know how i was doing. I ignore. Then he texted my best friend to see if i changed number... Now he is realising that i just dont want to talk to him. No contact is the best thing to do if u use it for yourself. After 4 months you might not want him back because u have realised SO much. Please go no contact. Its the best advice i could give u. You have enough pain to handle. Concentrate on ur healing, your feelings, put yourself first! Keep us posted! Hugs!! Xoxo 3
shineslikegold Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 I sweetie. Listen to me: i was in a relationship for 5 years. We were the best couple ever. Obviously had our issues like everyone else. He dumped me out of no where via text message. I was super hurt. You can only imagine. I am still hurt, to be honest. TEXT MESSAGE? What a *********! Anyway I agree completely. It's hard to start, but you need to just do it. My friend was good friends with a girl for a few years, then dated her for a year and a half, and now is trying to jump back into being friends. There are obviously still lingering feelings between the two of them, but since they don't maintain NC it makes it even more difficult. Do yourself the favor and just don't respond. Delete his number/text thread if you have to. I know there is that desire to reach out, but you'll never heal if you keep doing it.
Mz_sassy_77 Posted October 20, 2013 Posted October 20, 2013 You NEED to break all contact with him. It's the only way you will start to move on. I have been broken up for several months now and really starting to feel soooo much better. I dont even think of them most of the time. And you know what, I credit this to NC. Read through the other posts on this site on NC. It really does work. And its not for him, you need to do this for yourself. How can you possibly be real friends again? Do you want to see them with another person when he starts dating? Do you want to hear about how great his life is? How happy he is? Staying friends is a nice idea but I just dont think it works most of the time. One reasons is one person is always wanting more then friendship. Years from now when you are both in other relationships and truly happy maybe then you can think about being friends. But it wont be for a long time. NC is hard at first. You need to distract yourself with other things. But before you know it months have gone by. It does get easier and you do move on.
Author LeXii Posted October 20, 2013 Author Posted October 20, 2013 You guys are so right, I ought to toughen up and just ignore him. NC is really the only thing that's going to help me get my life together so I shouldn't be wasting all of my emotional energy feeling sorry for someone who left me. I'm really sorry about your breakup helloprincess, if it makes you feel any better, my ex and I broke up over Facebook. I'm out of the country for a few months but the least he could've done was called or skyped or something. I feel so betrayed and there's always this constant battle between his good intentions and my hurt feelings.
Recommended Posts