Similar Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 my head is spinning for nearly 3 years my best friend (a guy) and I have only met up now and then for one particular reason (not "hanging out" or for social chit chat). met him recently after nearly a year of not seeing him, feeling quite giddy about it (after so long), he told me he felt quite nervous about seeing me too. the same day we decided to do something quite different..next weekend, involving both being alone and chit chat. in fact in my mind it seems like a complete date. we've had a pretty shaky weird yet incredibly strong friendship all along because part of me really like him as more than a friend but he has from time to time reminded me that he has a girlfriend, inbetween the poems and compliments i've got and yada yada. plus, he's still reminding me that i've hurt him (by in my opinion being honest but nevermind, im quite willing to say sorry about it) so i dont really know why he wants to hang out with me. i wouldn't die if it turns out to be a very casual hangout, but im afraid i would perish in Disappointment. since i got to know him i have been single because there is no one i want to talk to other than him. this all sound quite abstract i guess, not wanting to go into details, it would take forever to do that
Criticality Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 The "why" could be either because you're really good in the sack. Or that he has feelings for both you and the other woman, and can't, or don't want to, choose between you. Stuff in what you wrote kinda sounds like he does have feelings for you. But please do elaborate on the whole "has a girlfriend" part...
Author Similar Posted October 19, 2013 Author Posted October 19, 2013 would he know if i'm good in the sack? no.. his girlfriend, well i have a problem of blocking her out of the image, i don't know if his still with her but i guess its best to presume so. when i met him however, recently, i felt like Everything was my fault because sometimes im really not attracted to him. which bother me more than his 'gf'. yet, i keep thinking about him, in ways I shouldn't and not long ago he also invited me to a family party :S its so weird, confusing and tiring that im going to meet him regardless, and say sorry about things i felt i had a right to say, and then im going to go home with a much better image of who my friend actually is, after some hours together, rather than our usual 1 hour meeting.
whichwayisup Posted October 22, 2013 Posted October 22, 2013 my head is spinning for nearly 3 years my best friend (a guy) and I have only met up now and then for one particular reason (not "hanging out" or for social chit chat). met him recently after nearly a year of not seeing him, feeling quite giddy about it (after so long), he told me he felt quite nervous about seeing me too. the same day we decided to do something quite different..next weekend, involving both being alone and chit chat. in fact in my mind it seems like a complete date. we've had a pretty shaky weird yet incredibly strong friendship all along because part of me really like him as more than a friend but he has from time to time reminded me that he has a girlfriend, inbetween the poems and compliments i've got and yada yada. plus, he's still reminding me that i've hurt him (by in my opinion being honest but nevermind, im quite willing to say sorry about it) so i dont really know why he wants to hang out with me. i wouldn't die if it turns out to be a very casual hangout, but im afraid i would perish in Disappointment. since i got to know him i have been single because there is no one i want to talk to other than him. this all sound quite abstract i guess, not wanting to go into details, it would take forever to do that Instead of focusing on his reasons as to why he wants to see you, focus on YOUR reasons to see him. He has a girlfriend, which he mentioned to you in passing. He's mentioned that you hurt him... You being single and having to rely on him is not good! This guy is sort of playing you for an ego feed, he knows you're into him, knows he can call you and you'll come running to him. Find new friends, especially women! He is not good for you, this so called friendship is damaging to your self esteem. Friendships should not be confusing like this.
Author Similar Posted October 22, 2013 Author Posted October 22, 2013 well i've accepted the deal really. find it very hard to have female friends but thanks
SpiralOut Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 It is good to get closure. Please don't put too much hope into this, though. I would not be surprised if this guy has other "friends" that he does this with.
whichwayisup Posted October 26, 2013 Posted October 26, 2013 You gotta kill the good stuff in your heart that you may still feel about him. Rid of the fantasy of who you think / want him to be. Our minds just do that sometimes! Then the emotions make you believe that's who he is. Try making some women friends, it'll make a huge difference in your life. 1
Author Similar Posted October 27, 2013 Author Posted October 27, 2013 I hear what everyone is saying but he is my best friend, will Always be and I want it that way. At times I tried breaking Contact for a coupla months or more, spending time with other friends but I was so miserable without him no Words can describe it. It doesn't matter if he's the same to others, has a girlfriend, whatever, its Ok. I was just curious as to why he wanted to spend more time with me IRL, but it's probably me who has become more accepting than previously and realized that I'm pretty stupid cos even though I get a bit jealous at times, I'm not really attracted to him and I don't know why I keep forgetting it, stupid me.
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