crazyinluv Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 I'm not new to the dating scene but I never knew how well this really works. A guy could be taking you for granted but if you block him on all social networking sites and do not contact for at least 5 months (or more), you will see his once confidence façade break down before your eyes. I think the key is to let them know you like them however you're not going to put up with their behavior. It's the only thing MEN understand. Good Luck.
Simon Phoenix Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 I'm not new to the dating scene but I never knew how well this really works. A guy could be taking you for granted but if you block him on all social networking sites and do not contact for at least 5 months (or more), you will see his once confidence façade break down before your eyes. I think the key is to let them know you like them however you're not going to put up with their behavior. It's the only thing MEN understand. Good Luck. How would you know if his confident facade breaks down if you are in No Contact? 5
JoelBarish Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Are you saying you are using NC to hurt someone's self esteem? What's the point? 2
r321148 Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 You really haven't grasped the point of "No Contact". It isn't a game you use to hurt and "break down" the other person; it is to give you time to reflect, heal and improve yourself as a person. 4
barky2 Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 Nc is for you and you only. It's for you to have a cave as one poster put it. Getting satisfaction out of another's pain or them breaking down isn't at all what it's for. Nc is to get you to a point where you no longer care,indifference. Barky 3
flight E Posted October 20, 2013 Posted October 20, 2013 I don't think you are cruel lik the last poster said. Maybe because she said men that why some people are finding it distasteful but the truth is we are human. We love to see that the person who hurt us feels something too. And the truth is it works For men and for women. because as human we all have a bit of that narcissist streak in all oof us
r321148 Posted October 20, 2013 Posted October 20, 2013 Speak for yourself. I have never wanted an ex to suffer. I've been hurt badly sure. I've wanted them to miss me sure. But I'd never say that I wanted them to be miserable or break down their confidence. The few girls I've actually loved in my time I really do wish them all the best. I am not in contact with my 2 longest term partners but I really do hope they are both doing well. I would take no pleasure in them being miserable as I think part of loving someone is wanting the best for them even if that isn't you. It wasn't the fact the OP said "men". It was this line: "you will see his once confidence façade break down before your eyes." That sounds a lot like taking pleasure in someone else's pain. This is not the point of NC. I think by taking pleasure in his loss of confidence all you are doing is showing that your NC hasn't worked. Despite not contacting him you haven't healed and are still bitter. Life's too short to waste on bitterness.
flight E Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 I was not saying to be make anyone miserable or suffer. I do not wish evil on any one. But I will love to see her smug and I hold all the aces look fade when she sees she doesn't anymore fade. I think that's wat the OP meant by confidence shaken. If that makes me a bad person. Then sure am a bad person
flight E Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 Oh she said confident facade shaken. Yes I will love that
flight E Posted October 21, 2013 Posted October 21, 2013 And I know that feeling of never wanting anyone to suffer you may be just like me an empath. I am learning to douse down that part of me becos I have learned that people who deserve to suffer should be allowed to its the only way they learn and if you look at the bigger picture you might be helping someelse down the line. Saving someone from mistreatment. If someone treats you badly. It's right to pay them in thier own coin. Moving on and letting their confidence break from noticing they have no control over you is a delight. You didn't go out of you way to hurt them they hurt because they are who they are. I saw an ex and I wasn't hurt even though she was happy and doing very well
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