sickpuppy Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 How do you respond to or what if anything do you respond to a text received from someone who's rejected you twice for a date in the recent past with no counter offer to their first excuse then no answer to you texting them asking them out a second time? Do you not respond at all? Or do you act like nothing happened? Or reply with something else? (I'm talking about a person you've asked out once who had an excuse, then the second time never replied to your text asking them out. Basically you know they didn't want to go out with you in the first place.) IE: A hey what's up? sent to you.. Most likely an attention whoring tactic. So do you bother to respond? Or act like nothing happened? Or is there a good one word etc. reply and then nothing.
emva07 Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 doesn't want YOU, but likes the attention. Don't be that guy. She will try to see how far she can get with teasing you but not taking it anywhere. People like this LOVE to see how low someone is willing to go for them. 1
todreaminblue Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 let me get this straight .....so if i were to send a text to a guy and say hey how are you .......hope you are well..or a hey how are you going what are you up to.that's seen as a cry from an attention whore?......not just a woman who wants to know they are ok and well or interested in knowing that.. why does everything textual have to have such a negative connotation placed on simple setnences is there no positive interactions anymore/...send me back please scottttttttttttttyyyyy 1980s drop me offfff there..... i have had enough........deb 2
irc333 Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Well, her wanting to stay in touch, could be more of a "Yellow" flag. It could mean she is trying to lead you on. I had quite a few women do this, they'd turn me down, but stillwould want me to hit the night clubs with them or go out and do something with them in a platonic fashion, but yet flirt with me. Eventually that got old and I would probably would've texted her back "not much, what's up with you?" But I wouldn't be as engaging in conversation with her as I would have been with her when she rejected me. Though, some women have been known to reject women on more than one occasion only to finally accept a date from them later. let me get this straight .....so if i were to send a text to a guy and say hey how are you .......hope you are well..or a hey how are you going what are you up to.that's seen as a cry from an attention whore?......not just a woman who wants to know they are ok and well or interested in knowing that.. why does everything textual have to have such a negative connotation placed on simple setnences is there no positive interactions anymore/...send me back please scottttttttttttttyyyyy 1980s drop me offfff there..... i have had enough........deb
todreaminblue Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Well, her wanting to stay in touch, could be more of a "Yellow" flag. It could mean she is trying to lead you on. I had quite a few women do this, they'd turn me down, but stillwould want me to hit the night clubs with them or go out and do something with them in a platonic fashion, but yet flirt with me. Eventually that got old and I would probably would've texted her back "not much, what's up with you?" But I wouldn't be as engaging in conversation with her as I would have been with her when she rejected me. Though, some women have been known to reject women on more than one occasion only to finally accept a date from them later. yeah i see that yellow flag i also see that sometimes women say hey how are you and mean exactly that no cry for attention just a genuine question......i guess it makes it hard on guys to know which is what and where you stand.....but heck makes it hard for women too who try to just say hi how are you with genuine interest ...and build a conversation...... thanks for your reply irc....deb
WhiteButton Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 let me get this straight .....so if i were to send a text to a guy and say hey how are you .......hope you are well..or a hey how are you going what are you up to.that's seen as a cry from an attention whore?......not just a woman who wants to know they are ok and well or interested in knowing that.. why does everything textual have to have such a negative connotation placed on simple setnences is there no positive interactions anymore/...send me back please scottttttttttttttyyyyy 1980s drop me offfff there..... i have had enough........deb Hi Deb, Saying hi to a guy is nice provided you have some credibility with him. The OP mentioned in his post that the girl shot him down two time essentially flaked on him second time he asked her out. And out of nowhere then contacted him again. In that case i would be suspicious of her intentions as well. 2
pyramid Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 She was probably seeing someone else at the time. Make your decision based on how you feel about that.
phineas Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 (edited) let me get this straight .....so if i were to send a text to a guy and say hey how are you .......hope you are well..or a hey how are you going what are you up to.that's seen as a cry from an attention whore?......not just a woman who wants to know they are ok and well or interested in knowing that.. why does everything textual have to have such a negative connotation placed on simple setnences is there no positive interactions anymore/...send me back please scottttttttttttttyyyyy 1980s drop me offfff there..... i have had enough........deb Did you even read the OP? It doesn't appear that way from your response. You seem to of missed the part where she turned him down the first time he asked her out & ignored him the 2nd time then out of the blue sends him an arbitrary text knowing he is interested in her. I've been in your place OP, if it's less than a month since you last texted her you ignore. After a month, "who is this?" then ignore no matter what she responds with. Edited October 19, 2013 by phineas
mbee Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 (edited) I think calling her an attention seeking whore is a bit of an extreme. I get what you are saying but this is why I thinking asking someone out primarily through text can go badly. It's possible she didn't get the text. For instance, I had a guy ask me out via text and my text messaging inbox was full. I looked at my phone bill, realized he texted me and it didn't go through and asked him again to send the text. I also have one friend who sends me texts and they seriously never go through 25% of the time. I'm not sure why, but I only know cause his texts get cut off or he'll send me an odd text where it's clear I didn't get the last text. The current guy I'm seeing... his texts also get cut off. My brother once sent me a text (I know cause he called me warning me he was sending a text) and I never got it. Waited 48 hours and had to ask him to send it again cause it never went through. Texting is really a poor way to schedule dates since things like this can happen. Calling or even scheduling something via Facebook or email at least ensures nothing silly will happen. Also, the guy I'm currently seeing sends very lackluster responses, sometimes things that just say "hey." If i took the advice from this forum, people might say he's not that into me. However, when we talk on the phone and in person he's extremely conversational and interested. He's also explained to me that he's unsure of how to respond via text. However, given she made an excuse the first time and MAY have ignored you the second time, I would come right out and say something along the lines of, "hey it's been awhile. What's up?" This happened to me before with guys while dating and you just never know someone's intentions until you give them a chance. It's not like you are losing anything by texting her. Just don't ask her out again and for the record, if you do ask her out, make sure to call and leave a voicemail. Try not to do it by text anymore. Edited October 19, 2013 by mbee
crederer Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 I dunno I went on two dates with a girl and I truly liked her but between work and many personal things I was going through I didn't keep in touch the way I should. It doesn;t mean I don't like her, it jus tmeans I have way bigger things on my mind than a girl I met 2 times. She got pretty offended though....
todreaminblue Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 Hi Deb, Saying hi to a guy is nice provided you have some credibility with him. The OP mentioned in his post that the girl shot him down two time essentially flaked on him second time he asked her out. And out of nowhere then contacted him again. In that case i would be suspicious of her intentions as well. thanks white button i do see where there would be con=fusion as to her intentions ...but...i think often true intentions can misconstrued and it may be entirely positive her "whats up"... i am not terribly fond of the paring of attention and whore...i think the connotation and meaning are entirely a negative male perspective......a bit demeaning actually.......demeaning a female for making contact on what might be a totally positive build to a conversation....conversations have to start somewhere.......sigh...i do see how it might be a case of hidden objective....i just think there is more of a likelihood there is no hidden objective...and men should stop looking for them and take it on face value...i am always told as a female ...not to over analyse...men should do the same thing and unless proven...react in a positive way...you know i think they should bring hankie etiquette back ...instead of texting if a woman drops a hankie in front of you all is good to go.... if she blows her nose in it first and then drops it..that then is a sure no... then conversations non verbal and otherwise would be so easy dontcha reckon...;0) ...hankies instead of texts rock on...lol...deb
Recommended Posts