JDPT Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 I feel like contacting her and asking her that she would rather be alone than with me damn it. Wow she worked a number on me, amazing
Simon Phoenix Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 I feel like contacting her and asking her that she would rather be alone than with me damn it. Wow she worked a number on me, amazing Please don't. 2
barky2 Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Stay strong bro Go for a walk or do something go clear your mind. I promise you, it won't be worth it right this second. Barky
Brown-Eyez Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Funny, I was just thinking the same thing about my guy.. and whatever you would tell me, just look in the mirror while you're sayin it..
Simon Phoenix Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Funny, I was just thinking the same thing about my guy.. and whatever you would tell me, just look in the mirror while you're sayin it.. You really need to change this mindset.
Ireallydontknow Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Don't you dare do it. I've seen you post too much to let you do that. It's suicide. We all miss our exes, or else we wouldn't be here, we'd be out having the time of our lives. What is it we miss? The comfort? Heck yeah, I can picture me wrapped around my ex, my head on her chest, that was comforting. You know what wasn't comforting? Having my heart ripped out of chest. What else do we miss, of the intimacy! Oh yep, that sure was great. You know what wasn't great? Her sharing it with someone else while with me. So don't give into to the comfort way of thinking. It's suicide I tell you. I'm almost 10 weeks NC. It's been hell. My GOD I MISS HER SO MUCH! But I know what will happen if I reach out. Nothing, it's going to be worst. So don't do it for me, for everyone here, yer better than that! 1
StyleOnEm Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Strong urges like that usually pass after a half hour or so. Wait it out... put that damn drink down.. and try to fall asleep. You'll feel better in the morning, Hank Moody.
Haydn Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Do not pick up the phone. Imagine if someone else picked it up!!!!!!! I know what its like to have moments of madness, yes a beer or two my be involved. Stay clean it helps. I sometimes take a walk by the river to take the edge off. But i don`t cross any bridges! Take care, keep going! If i can, you can!
Emma1234 Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Such a difficult feeling to fight! But you know you can do it. The thing that is helping me is to write on a piece of paper: 'Promise you won't, please don't' and imagine it is from my future self who (even if it takes months/years) will be happy again. By not contacting you are essentially helping your future self. Sounds odd, but we have got to do what works.
BC1980 Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 You are going through grief. I had this urge to call my ex last night, and I fought it off. It happens. I am 6 months post breakup, but I am only 7 weeks NC. I feel like I have hit a wall and am now struggling not to be nostalgic and remember the "good old times." I have to keep from blaming myself and trying to figure out how I could fix things. A week ago, I was at my best, and, now, the grief has just hit me. Look, it really is grief. You were together for 4 years. Probably practically married. I was basically married to my ex. We lived together, and I was a primary caregiver to his child (whose mother had passed away years before). You grieve the loss of these people, and it's like a death almost. Just because it was a breakup and not a divorce doesn't diminish how hard it is. You had a life with her. You have to face these feelings by reminding yourself of the reality and by continuing to choose NC. Because NC it essentially a choice for you, and you must always have your own back.
Author JDPT Posted October 18, 2013 Author Posted October 18, 2013 Those moments are so debilitating. It makes me feel like I'm dealing with day one all over again. Need to find better cooking skills when suddenly attacked by those urges. I know deep inside that I don't want her back, I believe it's mostly curiosity to know. But I do know that if I continue to wonder it will eventually lead me to discover something that will set me back big time. To sum it up, I did not contact her and will continue to push forward. Thanks team! 4
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