yesterday2501 Posted October 17, 2013 Posted October 17, 2013 A few months ago I met a girl I really liked. We had great conversation leading up to the first date, tons in common, and the first date went really well (I thought). She was much less frequent texting after that, to the point where I didn't think I was going to hear from her again. I asked her if I did something wrong and after days of not hearing anything, she reiterates her interest and it's like everything's back to normal. But this trend continued (including at least one time where she was going to come hang out with me and never showed) until I eventually stopped hearing from her. A couple weeks ago, I decided to take a break from dating since it really wasn't working out. I found her number and decided to send her one last text to the effect of "Hey, how are you, I really enjoyed meeting you, no hard feelings." I didn't expect a text back, but more than a day later, she did. The girl tends to only send like one or two texts a day and cut out mid-conversation, and then I don't hear anything for like a day or several. She claims to be extremely busy with work, just moved into her own place (had been living with her mother), and, I guess, tends to fall asleep a lot (narcolepsy???). And yet, the other night, she texts me completely at random late at night and when I ask her if she wants to get coffee sometime this week, and she says yes. I tell her that I was pretty crazy about her when we met and that I was looking forward to spending more time getting to know her. Her reply was that she hasn't had a lot of self-confidence, which is why dating is hard for her. I said, "Are you kidding?" I told her I thought she was awesome and that I had an amazing time when we met. Then I asked her if that was why she stopped texting, her self-confidence. I realized calling her out wasn't a great move, so I immediately said "Never mind, it's ok, you had reasons I'm sure..." That was Sunday night and I haven't heard a thing since (it's Thursday). Texted her the next day to say good morning, nothing. Waited until last night and apologized for bringing it up, told her how much I liked her, gave her a spot to meet for coffee... nothing. What the crazy hell? I really don't know why she would need to be dishonest with me; if months went by and she still wasn't interested, had a boyfriend, whatever, there was no reason to text me back in the first place. And even after that point, I only implied meeting for coffee to "catch up." And she said yes, so why the silence? It also wasn't like I said "By the way, screw you for never getting back to me!" The girl keeps putting me back on the hook and I can't for the life of me figure out if she's some crazy person who gets off on the attention (which certainly did not seem like the case when we met), or if she's just an incredibly busy narcoleptic whose self-esteem issues keep her from texting on a regular basis, for some reason (also not an initial impression I got). Was she trying to say that she doesn't have the self-confidence to tell me to get lost??? Who is so damn busy they can't send texts for days on end???
Philosoraptor Posted October 17, 2013 Posted October 17, 2013 She's either playing games or not incredibly interested (but keeping you on the backburner just in case). You don't seem very confident. If you don't enjoy the games, don't play them. Just write off women who play games and find one who is direct with their communication.
Author yesterday2501 Posted October 17, 2013 Author Posted October 17, 2013 Why would she be keeping me on the backburner? She hasn't heard from me in months, barely knows me... Why play games with someone you barely have contact with? I am confident... that I've spent a lot of time this year dating, meeting people... and most of them were psychotic, save for maybe this one. Except of course, the fact that she's incredibly flaky. Like I said, I was ready to take a break until I heard back from her (although I have to admit, not dating has been incredibly boring...).
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