Sugarkane Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 Honestly, does it really matter how you are dumped? There isn't one person on this planet who is happy to be dumped, no matter how it's done. Even if she dumped you in the most respectful way possible (whatever that is), you are still going to feel like sh*t and you are still going to be dumped. I mean Vinny, you are 3 months in and you are rehashing how you were dumped? That's something you should rehash right after it happens, not three months down the road. You really need to learn how to repel these thoughts, because it seems like once they start, you shut down and go into sad bastard mode. You have to start being active in your recovery -- you can't just fall to sh*t every time a thought hits your mind. It makes healing a lot faster if you aren't treated like garbage.
Sugarkane Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 PS: Took me 8 months to deal with my same situation. I asked her over and over why... and got nothing. They always sound really dumb/ psychotic to me. It sounds extremely stupid to dump someone and you can't find a reason?!
Simon Phoenix Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 It makes healing a lot faster if you aren't treated like garbage. Not really. When I've been treated like "garbage" I've moved on a hell of a lot faster. I mean, why would you want anything to do with someone who treats you like garbage?
Helloprincess Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 I got dumped after 5 years by text too......... It really sucks. The thing is, they were probably thinking about leaving us way before they ended it. I know its really hard.... But u have to believe that everything happens for a reason. Think about it: in ten years, do you think you are still going to be depressed, sad, miserable? I think and hope the answer is not. Or even worse, what if you die tomorrow? (Knock on wood). Is it worth it that you are wasting your precious time and being unhappy on something you cant change??? One single person is reponsible of YOUR happiness? Look around you and count your blessings. Youre alive, you have family and friends, you have dreams. Start being happy with yourself. Love yourself first and let the past behind!! My ex texted me today after 4 months nc... And im strong enough to ignore. Because my future seems so bright!!! Dont lose hope! Life is beautiful and short, live it up!!!
tinker683 Posted October 19, 2013 Posted October 19, 2013 I dumped my ex via text and frankly I feel like she deserved it. Why? Because 3 months before our break up she came to me and told me that she was 35 and she didn't want to mess around anymore, that she wanted something serious from me. We had been dating for a little over a year at that point. I had wanted the same thing but I had sensed a lot of ambivalence from her so I was waiting for her to decide when she was ready. So..it was good, for about two weeks after that. Then things started getting difficult in her life and she pulled away from me. I didn't say anything at first, just made it clear to her that I was there for her. Days she kept me away turned into weeks. She lived 10 minutes away from me but only afford an hour or two of her time once a week or two. When I tried talking to her about it, she would either withdrawal further, tell me to just deal with it or break up, or she would belittle or insult me (Telling me she "didn't have time to baby my feelings " or that I was "crying like a petulant child") Kind in mind, I wasn't yelling at her or anything like that, I just kept trying to bring up the fact that she wasn't doing what she told me she wanted...what I had allowed myself to believe she wanted. Bu I stuck around because I wanted to show her that I really was in this for the long haul and that while things were rough in her own life, I would be there. Thanksgiving she wasn't with me 5 minutes before she told me she'd have to bail out early to spend with her friends, she didn't spend Christmas with me because "she didn't feel like it" and she didn't even talk to me on New Years Eve. I ended it mid-January via text and as far as I'm concerned, she didn't deserve anything more from me. I had given her enough of my time and energy. She strung me along for months and and then crushed me. She lived 10 minutes from me but couldn't bother to spend any degree time with me, my relationship with her had been reduced to texts. I felt ending it with her via text was very apropos 1
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